My ex still thinks we're together

itsanne

Indie_Kid wrote: »

Bit rude not to when we're with other people. No-one else is aware of what's gone on.

Indie Kid, your Aspergers is causing you problems here. IT IS NOT RUDE NOT TO SPEAK TO SOMEONE WHO IS HARASSING YOU OR WORRYING YOU IN ANY WAY.

If no one else is aware of what is going on, you need to tell them. IT IS OKAY TO TELL EVERYONE.

Someone needs to tell him he must stop behaving the way he is and must not go to places where you are going. Your coach really should do that. If he won't, your parent should, and both of you should speak to the police if he doesn't stop.

Indie_Kid

meritaten wrote: »

I think this man is not going to be put off by you. I think you need to go to the police.
Why? because he is planning ahead. you are going to be in Bournemouth in October - and he is going because YOU are going.
Indie - I know its not PC but, is your group composed of people with mental health issues? because this guys MHIs are dangerous. He sounds like he is 'fixated' on you?

Yes, some of us (including him) do / have had mental health issues.

My coach has said he will have a word with him if I want. I have considered the police; but they were rather crap when I had similar issues last time - person harrassing me (although it didn't seem as though he liked me in that way) has Autism and I was told he doesn't know what he's doing, therefore, his behaviour is ok.:mad:

I spoke to mum earlier and she did say that if I did change running clubs, there is a chance that he may try to follow me there. Having thought about it, this is something that scares me. Along with what another poster said about him following me to Bournemouth. I actually wonder now if that's why he asked where it was.

He hasn't, thankfully, tried to text me again yet.

yvonne13_2

OP I don't mean to be funny but haven't you put yourself in this situation? You blocked his number then stratigically you both managed to go out for something to eat.

You need to tell him straight that you need your own space and stop all contact with you straight away. You giving him mixed messages is no good and will only end up with two people getting hurt and confused.

Caroline_a

Person_one wrote: »

Hang on, she was punished for his actions? That's not on at all, what a terrible message to send to a group of young people!

The OP should not change her running club, if his behaviour is enough of a problem that she feels she needs to do that, then he should be told to leave.

Sorry, missed this before. She wasn't punished, it's a little complicated, but as I run a specialised group and she isn't a specialist - she just remained in her generalist group for more sessions. It was actually a better option for her anyway.

It depends in this case on whether the OP has access to other coaches - and other groups within the club.

Indie_Kid

Caroline_a wrote: »

It depends in this case on whether the OP has access to other coaches - and other groups within the club.

There's only one coach at the club. We're a tiny club.

I may have worked out who this girlfriend is - sometimes, he phones this woman who he tells me is his ex and he clals her darling? I am convinced it's her. Unless I am being deluded here and people who are still in contact with their exes call them things like darling? He actually calls her in front of me and it sounds as though they're more than friends.:mad:

thorsoak

Indie_Kid wrote: »

There's only one coach at the club. We're a tiny club.

I may have worked out who this girlfriend is - sometimes, he phones this woman who he tells me is his ex and he clals her darling? I am convinced it's her. Unless I am being deluded here and people who are still in contact with their exes call them things like darling? He actually calls her in front of me and it sounds as though they're more than friends.:mad:

Why is this bothering you? He's not your boyfriend - you're not having a relationship with him - or are you? Quite frankly, I'm beginning to wonder!

Listen to your mother - she amongst others have told you not be be alone with this man. Make sure that you follow her advice.

fireyfirenze

Indie_Kid wrote: »

There's only one coach at the club. We're a tiny club.

I may have worked out who this girlfriend is - sometimes, he phones this woman who he tells me is his ex and he clals her darling? I am convinced it's her. Unless I am being deluded here and people who are still in contact with their exes call them things like darling? He actually calls her in front of me and it sounds as though they're more than friends.:mad:

why does that matter?! you want well rid of the guy so the fact that he has a girlfriend is probably a good thing. or are you secretly bothered because you won't get the same attention?

Indie_Kid

Woulfn'tt you be !!!!ed if someone was clearly leading you on?

barbarawright

Like every other person here, I am confused about the title. Why will you not answer this question - is he actually your ex?

Georgiegirl256

Indie_Kid wrote: »

Woulfn'tt you be !!!!ed if someone was clearly leading you on?

Leading you on? But you don't want a relationship with him, so how can he be leading you on?