People Judge Me for my Wedding, but I Love It

tillyenna

So, reading through the threads here, I figure there's quite a few of us that are having 'alternative weddings' y'know, the kind of weddings where we tell people what we're doing, and they have a right old laugh and then say "No really, what are you actually going to do?" the kind of weddings where people say "You mean you're not having XYZ? But you CAN'T do that for a wedding"


And you're just reply with: "My wedding is going to be ACE"


So, 'alternative wedding ideas' what are people doing that make vogue-style brides go all "judgeyface", or what DID you do? Or, if you are only planning your hypothetical wedding at the moment, what are you planning?

tillyenna

I'll begin shall I? LOL


So, my wedding is going to be at my church (I'm a regular church goer) nothing special there, except that there won't be flowers. Apparently that's contentious. Also I'm not wearing shoes. And it's casual dress (not smart casual, actual we don't care if you wear jeans and a t-shirt casual). Oh, and I'm just going to walk to the church from my hotel (its like 15 minutes, seriously. Although I may wear shoes for this bit), apparently you're supposed to have a car, but meh, I like walking.


Clothes wise - The Groom is wearing jeans, because he wants an excuse to buy some cowboy boots. The bridesmaids are all wearing widely different things, because I told them they could design whatever they wanted and I would make it, and the 8 and 9 year old ones have some CRAZY ideas. The adults are a little more conservative, and slightly along a theme, but still will look completely different.


The reception (which is also another 'walk-to' moment) is held in a cafe/bar at a nearby play park, which we have exclusive use for, there will be a bouncy castle and (if room in the budget) a facepainter. Food is consisting of a barbeque, a sweetie table, and jelly and icecream. No cake. NO CAKE.


There's no dancefloor, and therefore no DJ, we might have a playlist going in the background for atmosphere, mostly it will be the beatles. We're not having a first dance, we may have a first bounce on the bouncy castle together (although 'first bounce' does sound dirty)


There's probably other stuff that people have gone all judgey-face over (my mother in particular). Before, when I was trying to organise a wedding that I thought was 'weddingy' and that she would like, I was DREADING the day, completely dreading it (except the bouncy castle, which is the only thing which I've always been set on having), now it's MY wedding done MY way, I am SO FREAKIN EXCITED. It's going to be an AWESOME DAY.

Sazzarella

My wedding isnt going to be as 'Alternative' as some yet ive still had bad comments about the following things:

Felt flower boquets instead of real flowers
Pink/Blue hair
Blue shoes instead of white satin
Boots with a kilt instead of ghillie brogues
Felt flower buttonholes instead of Heather
Not having it in a bowling club
Not inviting 785755432156 cousins to the wedding breakfast to make room for friends I actually like
Lego placenames
Bacon/Sausage rolls for the evening buffet

Now that all seems tame to me but still people have felt the need to comment on them.

tatabubbly

I'm having a 'normal' cookie cutter wedding per se but people seem to be quoting me on how much I'm spending on stuff. Like, what does it matter to them?

And also that I'm sticking to my guestlist numbers and won't be giving invites to our parents to invite whoever they want.. I don't know them so why would I want them there??

Apart from that nobody has said anything, but I think its due to the fact that we're in a different country to all of them so they can't chat about us!

Sazzarella

tatabubbly wrote: »

And also that I'm sticking to my guestlist numbers and won't be giving invites to our parents to invite whoever they want.. I don't know them so why would I want them there??

This! Why would people want to go to a wedding of someone they have never met? Don't understand it either.

daisyparr

Hi ladies I thought I would drop you a line. I love the sound of your weddings! that is exactly how I would have mine - something fun, personal and intimate but I think I should really find a boyfriend first! LOL!

So I am casting for a taster tape for a Documentary which isn't actually going to be televised at this stage; we make a taster tape and present it to the channel and if they like it we then go into production. We are doing the documentary taster tape on Brides-to-be that are currently planning their wedding. I thought I would get in touch to see if any of you would like to know more?

Really love the ideas you have, I was thinking (if it ever happens for me-violins please, I'd like an old fashioned fete type with a carousel!)

quidsy

Registry office in thailand in jeans & tshirt, staff witnessed, no flowers, no party, no cake, no family, no friends, not even a wedding night as we got hammered with some friends later on who wandered where we had been that morning & both of us crashed out in separate rooms .

Called my mum at 9.30am Uk time to give her the happy news & she was surprised to say the least, esp as she hadn't actually met the groom, none of my family had, I hadn't met his family either. 15 years later we are doing ok, even with the lack of a single photo from the day.

We literally have nothing to mark the day except two exceptionally beautiful thai wedding certificates & the later translations.

A wedding is about 2 people only. Do it how you want & sod everyone else.

tillyenna

Sazzarella wrote: »

My wedding isnt going to be as 'Alternative' as some yet ive still had bad comments about the following things:

Felt flower boquets instead of real flowers
Pink/Blue hair
Blue shoes instead of white satin
Boots with a kilt instead of ghillie brogues
Felt flower buttonholes instead of Heather
Not having it in a bowling club
Not inviting 785755432156 cousins to the wedding breakfast to make room for friends I actually like
Lego placenames
Bacon/Sausage rolls for the evening buffet

Now that all seems tame to me but still people have felt the need to comment on them.

They sound like fab ideas! I especially love the felt flowers! I'm trying to decide if there's anything I could hold in my hands whilst walking down the aisle instead of a bouquet... I'm thinking maybe a bouquet of lollipops at the moment! LOL.


Also Lego placenames? That's legendary! Who would complain about that.

tillyenna

quidsy wrote: »

A wedding is about 2 people only. Do it how you want & sod everyone else.

Quidsy, your wedding sounds ACE. I'm a bit of a pinterest addict, and yet the only pin that I've found that I love which is wedding inspired has been the phrase 'I want a marriage more beautiful than my wedding' It's about what comes after, not the day itself.


Glad to hear you're still happy :-D

Mrs_Huggett

I love this thread, although as I am in the game of hiring out stuff for weddings and providing alternative music, I bloominwell should love it, have a look at rock n roll bride for lots of alternative inspiration, not to copy, but to let you see that it's OK to do what you want, and to make different choices.

redfragglebiker

We're having a traditional(ish) feel but we have a few definite quirks (some of which have horrified my mother!!)
I'm not havingf "proper" wedding shoes. I've designed a pair of converse trainers on their website and will be having those. I can wear them afterwards and I will be comfy on the day. Plus my dad's a bit on the short side so I don't have to worry about towering over him in heels!
We are not having placecards - each guest instead will have a lego figure on the table holding a flag with their name on which they can take home. We're also making legobrick chocolates as favours.
I'm working out the cost of a bouncy castle but we're also having giant games such as giant jenga and connect 4 in the grounds of the reception venue.
The cake is not a traditional cake but is in the shape of a drumkit (my OH had been a drummer since he was 10)
Our first dance is a reggae song (don't ask - odd in-joke with me and the OH but it's definitely not a tradtional lovey dovey song)
I'm walking down the aisle to a Pink Floyd Song (me and my Dad are big fans!) and walking back out to Muse!
We don't have a guest book. We instead have some plain juigsaw puzzle pieces for people to write a message on and these will be put together and set in heatproof resin when the day is is done so we can use them as placemats and coasters
I'm NOT having a top table cos our family is too complicated
There's more but my brain is fried right now!