The Trials & Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

tea_lover

Sitting in the garden trying to read and all I can hear is my neighbours discussing baby names. Their son must be a year old at most. As if to add insult to injury they had a big christening for him a few months ago - have never shown their faces at church before or since.

Feeling very bitter, and disappointed in myself for being such a cow.

isla_red

Congratulations jammy! :T

tea you're not a cow at all, don't say that. It's bloody hard going through all of this and yet there are lucky so and sos out there who find it effortless.

*passes the wine around the thread*

My friend who has just had her first cycle of IVF called me today with a BFP. Pleased for her but at the same time...*pours more wine*

codemonkey

My niece is pregnant with her second, my friend is pregnant with her second and another friend is pregnant with her first. All announced in the last couple of weeks. Having a massive "No fair", stompy feet moment.

Also, so sick of bleedin football. I quite like football to a point but DH has to watch every single game and the highlights and analysis and I'm footballed out now.

frozenpenguin

Gah, is there any wine left around here?

Another Facebook 'friend', another blummin annoucement complete with scan picture (and another person swiftly blocked from my news feed only seconds later...)

Hope you're all having a good Saturday and enjoying the lovely weather xxx

mrsvicx

Can I share the wine please? I'm having a 'poor me' moment (which won't last long to be fair!)
I did that stupid thing that women do of having a sneaky look at an ex's Facebook page and he's changed his cover photo to a scan picture - GAH!!!
Note to self not to look again for next few months...

FP, it's good to know I'm not the only one that blocks Facebook friends when they announce pregnancies - I think it's self preservation...

Code - are you married to my husband?? We are currently watching the football, I have no idea who it is as I've lost interest too, after watching three games a day for the past week!!!

And I must just say a huge congrats to Jammy

danielley

codemonkey wrote: »

Congratulations jammy. Hope you have a stress free pregnancy.

Has anyone found that their friends have got weird over this whole infertility thing? I've got a friend and I told her that we can't have children and why and she told me to read 'The Secret, (multiple times). I pointed out that reading a book wasnt going to suddenly make DH produce sperm or develop a way to deliver it and now she doesn't bother with me. It's not like she avoids me or anything she just doesn't make the effort to get in touch anymore. Feeling really hurt by itm

Code maybe she is keeping her distance as she is embarrassed and doesn't know how to act about it. As if infertility wasn't bad enough, it makes us socially awkward!

I have a circle of friends, one or two that I am quite close to and about four or five others as well. In a way it's quite fortunate as not everyone has had children yet, but I still avoid talking about our struggle to conceive as when I do it seems I get a torrent of cliches and pity. I must admit that I would have probably said the same things myself 3 years ago.

I hope that you manage to feel better about it x

codemonkey

Actually, it turns out she'd sent me a message through an app telling me she was pregnant, but I hadn't updated it for a while and didn't get it, and she thought I was upset and needed space to deal with it, and I thought she was avoiding me. :rotfl::rotfl:

danielley

Oh goodness Code talk about ironic!

Are you ok? My sister in law was so sheepish when she announced her pregnancy and I overhead her telling my mother in law that she felt bad. This made me feel worse, that our issues were affecting how other people treat us and making them hide their happiness.

I do feel for those around us, there is nothing they can say that helps, as us lot are so super informed and know the hard facts, so inadvertantly they say the wrong things trying to be kind. In some ways I wish I'd kept quiet about the whole thing but the 'when are you having kids' question was coming up far too often.

Speaking of irony, a colleague from work has passed me on a paperback and it begins with the main character miscarrying on her 2nd attempt of IVF... It's not the focus of the book, I believe it's a thriller, but still...My colleague doesn't know about my treatment and she'd probably be mortified if she knew!

Ps Just got the IVF belief CD on eBay for £5.99 inc postage

mrsvicx

Evening all (I feel like I should raise a cap and do that weird knee bobbing thing that police do in films!!)
I'm feeling much better today, sorry for the moping last night. I'm guessing it was hormones - I got AF today :beer: finally!!! I think it's been about 6 and a half weeks since mc, so hopefully from next weekend we'll be back on the horse (so to speak!)
Perfect timing as DS is on a sleepover on Friday

tea_lover

Ooh derby has popped! Another graduate with an actual baby congrats!