Weddings - evening invite

Person_one

notanewuser wrote: »

None of them were married.............. :huh:

You mentioned living with etc.

I wouldn't invite someone and ignore the person they were living with, especially at an event that's about the importance of a relationship! If nothing else it's a chance to meet them and include them.

If a wedding is too expensive to invite partners, have a cheaper wedding.

duchy

paulineb wrote: »

The term wedding breakfast was never used by any of my friends when they got married and some of them had pretty big and expensive weddings, who knows, terminology may have changed in the last 15 years or so since I was last at a wedding, was always just referred to as a meal.

Ive also only ever been asked to go to the full day and evening reception or the reception itself, never the church and then to the reception at night.

Maybe the term is regional ...... It was always called the wedding breakfast in my living memory (of over fifty years).

Nothing annoys me more than a ceremony -then a long wait.....then the wedding meal/breakfast ....then more hanging around .....and then the evening do. When my first husband's cousin got married they stuck us in a hall for three hours with absolutely nothing...between ceremony and reception...with no warning (we'd have gone to the pub and sat in comfort and had something to eat had we known). I do think sometimes brides and grooms forget the people they have invited are actually their guests and a bit of thought for their comfort isn't a bad thing

Torry_Quine

duchy wrote: »

Maybe the term is regional ...... It was always called the wedding breakfast in my living memory (of over fifty years).

Nothing annoys me more than a ceremony -then a long wait.....then the wedding meal/breakfast ....then more hanging around .....and then the evening do. When my first husband's cousin got married they stuck us in a hall for three hours with absolutely nothing...between ceremony and reception...with no warning (we'd have gone to the pub and sat in comfort and had something to eat had we known). I do think sometimes brides and grooms forget the people they have invited are actually their guests and a bit of thought for their comfort isn't a bad thing

Known as the wedding breakfast to me too.


That's terrible expecting people to hang around for hours and thankfully I've never experienced it. Usually when the bridal party go for photos then people go to the reception venue and get a welcome drink while waiting.

daisiegg

paulineb wrote: »

The term wedding breakfast was never used by any of my friends when they got married and some of them had pretty big and expensive weddings, who knows, terminology may have changed in the last 15 years or so since I was last at a wedding, was always just referred to as a meal.

Ive also only ever been asked to go to the full day and evening reception or the reception itself, never the church and then to the reception at night.

Just because you didn't hear them using the term, doesn't mean that isn't what it was 'officially' called by their venue etc.

FBaby

I never thought of inviting evening guests to the ceremony too, however, I did have one such friend who asked very nicely if I'd mind if she came to the ceremony. I said that was absolutely fine. She didn't in the end but came to the evening.

notanewuser

Person_one wrote: »

I wouldn't invite someone and ignore the person they were living with, especially at an event that's about the importance of a relationship! If nothing else it's a chance to meet them and include them.

If a wedding is too expensive to invite partners, have a cheaper wedding.

I invited a group of close work colleagues. Only 1 had a partner, that nobody had met. Said colleague actually kept his partner away from work events as he had a tendency to "act up" for attention. Friend had no problem coming on his own - I think he enjoyed it more because he wasn't worrying constantly that he'd be shown up.

Another 2 single friends got together at our wedding - that wouldn't have happened if we'd given them "plus 1s".

duchy

Or maybe the plus ones would have got together too-Who knows

I do think as people are getting married later so the odds of having a partner you live with is higher -and simply that in your early twenties say you're often happy to go out as a group of singles with workmates -that the plus one is more complicated. I wouldn't dream of not giving a plus 1 to a married person...just living together is more complicated -especially if they are a long term couple who have chosen not to marry as if they don't think marriage is relevant why would I be spending £50 on a meal for someone I've never met who thinks marriage is irrelevant ?

I don't live with my partner although we are engaged -(two houses, adult kid at home scenario -one day we'll sell both houses and get married ) If he was invited to a wedding by someone I didn't know without a plus 1 I wouldn't be bothered but HE would be offended and wouldn't go as he thinks that as we're a couple it should be automatic to invite both (Good thing we're having a destination wedding - we'd never agree on the guest list LOL)

Georgiegirl256

duchy wrote: »

I wouldn't dream of not giving a plus 1 to a married person...just living together is more complicated -especially if they are a long term couple who have chosen not to marry as if they don't think marriage is relevant why would I be spending £50 on a meal for someone I've never met who thinks marriage is irrelevant ?

I would totally have to disagree with you there. I have two friends who have been with their partners for 20+ years, but I certainly don't think their relationship is any less relevant than mine just because I'm married and they're not. If we were all invited to a wedding, and my husband was invited, but their partners not, well personally, I'd be offended for them.

Some people agree with marriage, some don't, I certainly wouldn't treat anyone who wasn't married any different, because to me, the above two couples that I mentioned are two of the most dedicated couples I know.

If someone had only been with their boyfriend for a short while, then I can understand, but for long term relationships, I think it's totally different.

Person_one

notanewuser wrote: »

I invited a group of close work colleagues. Only 1 had a partner, that nobody had met. Said colleague actually kept his partner away from work events as he had a tendency to "act up" for attention. Friend had no problem coming on his own - I think he enjoyed it more because he wasn't worrying constantly that he'd be shown up.

Another 2 single friends got together at our wedding - that wouldn't have happened if we'd given them "plus 1s".

Then what I'm saying doesn't really apply much to your wedding does it?

newcook

My friends brother is getting married next year – as they are both from big close irish families there is no way they can afford loads of ‘plus 1’s ‘ for everyone (plus there wont be enough room for everyone to have a ‘plus 1’ ) so they have decided that for those who have a partner of less than 6 months wont get a ‘plus 1’ unless said partner is a friend of both bride and groom.
The way they see it is with the huge family list they have, they only have limited number of friends they can invite so they would rather invite friends than someones girl/boyfriend who they’ve never met.

As for the church invite but not to the breakfast – how was it worded on the invite? Ive had a couple of wedding invites for the evening but have been given details of the church incase I wanted to see the ceremony.