OS Singlies - We Do It Our Way!

mum2one

LavenderBees wrote: »

Welcome Mummybobble. For an awful moment, I thought I would be chatting to myself...just like being at home, then :rotfl:

ETA - welcome the others, too! :j

Ok - this must be one of the hardest jobs that a singlie without family has to do...not meant to be morbid, but this year is the year I am going to sort out my paperwork, and by that I mean my will and my living will.

The problem I have is that I have no family at all that I want to leave my worldly goods to, in fact, unfortunately, I feel I need to make it water tight to stop toxic siblings getting anything. I spent a good part of this weekend, trying to think what I want to do, but it's incredibly hard.

Has anyone any experience of this? What sorts of things did you think about?

I will involve a solicitor at some point but clearly I need to put a great deal more thought into what I want my will to achieve, before I involve a professional.

hah!! How to start a new hopeful thread off, eh? Cheerful Charlie, that's me :rotfl:

its a good one, although I have a daughter, the thought occured that (god forbid) that we were both in an accident, have no siblings - DD has a half brother (don't know the legal standing of him) so to make things watertight, if DD not around then everything goes to my friend, with the house going into trust for her 2 sons till there both 21, (over 21) they do what they want.

My solicitor thought it was a good idea as stops it going through cousins etc xx

LavenderBees

silverwhistle wrote: »

Hmm, this has been a bit of a reminder. I've _always_ been single, in the sense of living with anyone, nor any kids (immaculate conception seeming to have gone out of fashion..).:D

I've a similar issue in that I haven't made a will. Close family are older and, to be honest, nephew and niece are pretty comfortable and have better houses than mine already. Although I'd like to leave them something it would only be a smallish proportion.

So I don't know what to do and need to give it some thought. Those of you with kids generally have the answer in front of you, but I'll be interested in various peoples' responses.

It's certainly been a challenge for me. A couple of weeks ago when I was thinking about this, I considered charities close to my heart, and thought how sad and Billy-no-mates it seemed to have to consider leaving my hard earned to these rather than a close and loving family. But as I thought about it, the more I came round to the thought that leaving a legacy to one or more of these is actually a pretty good thing to do. To try to make life better for others...well, why not?

So, there will be bequests in mine to some of these close to my heart. If I can help one person to not go through what my parents have gone through with their illnesses, then quite honestly, that will be worthwhile.

LavenderBees

MrsAtobe wrote: »

Don't LB, I can't have roast pork at all as it makes the OH physically sick

See the benefits of a single life? Bed to yourself and roast pork, hmmm.

:rotfl:

Roast pork it has to be on Sunday :T. I'd make OH sit outside while I ate the pork...but maybe that's why I'm a singlie :rotfl:

Gosh, I must go to bed. Every time I try, I get drawn back in. It's a shame work interferes in my virtual life

Sleep tight, everyone

LB xx

Mrs_Bones

LavenderBees wrote: »

It's certainly been a challenge for me. A couple of weeks ago when I was thinking about this, I considered charities close to my heart, and thought how sad and Billy-no-mates it seemed to have to consider leaving my hard earned to these rather than a close and loving family. But as I thought about it, the more I came round to the thought that leaving a legacy to one or more of these is actually a pretty good thing to do. To try to make life better for others...well, why not?

So, there will be bequests in mine to some of these close to my heart. If I can help one person to not go through what my parents have gone through with their illnesses, then quite honestly, that will be worthwhile.

If you've not got any close kith and kin such as children I think charities that are close to your heart are a perfect place to leave money too. Much better for them to have it than the government which is what would happen to it if you died without a will and no next of kin to claim.

springdreams

MrsAtobe wrote: »

Don't LB, I can't have roast pork at all as it makes the OH physically sick

See the benefits of a single life? Bed to yourself and roast pork, hmmm.

There is also the ability to make spontaneous decisions without having to check if the arrangement suits anyone else too :j

mum2one

LavenderBees wrote: »

No, that's what I'm trying to work out. I think I'll feel much better, all fluffy and light, when it's in place. Thanks for the pointer on price. £100 is not too bad to get peace of mind.

But I'd like to know what I want in the will before I go, and then the solicitor can help me ensure that's what I get.

I agree with Calicocat that my will will be fluid...as friends come and go...as friendships change, as circumstances change. But then I guess it's the same for everyone.

I have a plan, I think -

1. Draft the basics of my will - things I don't want to forget - make appointment. Give sealed copies of will to trusted friends, with name of solicitor. Give solicitor details of friends. I don't want anyone getting ideas of bumping me off surreptitiously...;)


I did my will a couple of years ago, (had to update to family circumstances, I did mine under Will aid, - it usually happens around November, instead of paying solicitor - you make a donation to their charity, - simple will can be around £100. I given 3 friends the name of the solicitors and each diary I transfer the solicitors into the back of the diary. Also left provision that if i have a pet there is a sum of money that can be used for their care.
Also put in a provision for who is to look after DD and arranged for this person to control any money till she is 21

2. Draft basics of living will - make appt with GP to discuss - finalise and get it logged however it can be with NHS/GP. Ensure trusted friends have signed & witnessed copies. Ensure GP and phone has details of trusted friends
Never thought of that, good idea,

3. Draft funeral plan - I thought this would be awful to do, but I'm quite enjoying thinking of how I'd like to leave. Is this a substitute for my never had wedding?:o Anyway, an opportunity to be belle of the ball...ensure trusted friends have copies.
What I have done, is booked an appointment with a local furneral director and made furneral plans with them (was free)
It covers the basics
- Burial or cremation (gone for cremation)
-Ashes - do want them scattered at crematoriam or elsewhere (if there somewhere that means a lot to be scattered there)
Flowers - Asked for family flowers only, donations to be shared between 2 charities (one I have named the other to be choosen after death (incase air ambulance rescued me, I had cancer etc - it takes some of the strss away)
Songs - You have 2 hymns - asked for Old Rugged Cross (family hymn) and 1 to be choosen by DD (if not have put 2nd choice in
Curtains - Asked for the curtains to be pulled around - been to funerals where you go past the coffin, to me its like having to say goodbye again, where as with the curtain its like me saying goodbye


Hope trusted friends don't peg it before I do...will be darned inconvenient if they do ...:rotfl:

Sorry if that sounds morbid, for me I just wanted to take some of the stress away from family, if the worse happens, What really promoted me was 3 years ago I had my 1st anaphalxixs attack (I was a hairs breath away from dying had it not been for the quick action of a GP) and that prompted me to beinng orgainsed a bit more.

---

Apologies again for further morbid...

[B Nowadays we all have mobiles - what was suggested a few times by ambulance, doctors, police etc was to have emergency numbers listed in your phone as

ICE 1 -(in case of emergency) contact 1
ICE 2 - again an't get hold fo 1st person - there contact them.

Its not just for the worst case scenerio, but also if your phone got handed into the police they could at least trace someone who know you.

xx[/B]

springdreams

Mrs_Bones wrote: »

If you've not got any close kith and kin such as children I think charities that are close to your heart are a perfect place to leave money too. Much better for them to have it than the government which is what would happen to it if you died without a will and no next of kin to claim.

Don't forget theaters and museums - many are happy to be left something

mum2one

spirit wrote: »

Some of us have onesies too

I've gone for the onesies style nightdress - if I had a onesies need half an hr notice for the loo... xx

Macadamia

A first hello from me.
I was one of the readers of the last thread. (I don't like to think of myself as a lurker.)
I thought it was inspirational and compelling. (And I was worried the thread might fizzle out....or continue, with the title of ..christmas.. in mid summer)
So I am very glad it continues.
Thankyou. To everyone

MummyBobble

Hmm, it would be fab if I could write a will leaving my debts to my ex :rotfl:

Thinking that this has struck a chord with many of us LB :T xx