OS Singlies - We Do It Our Way!

bexster1975

Not aware Ellie that the government have a name for single men as a collective ( bet the leftover women do tho' - best not use that sort of language on here ). I think the big problem is that there are plenty of men available, the women just don't want them, and the life they bring.

I couldn't agree more that women are much more judgemental of other women than men ever are. Again, down to their own insecurities. I confess I hate hairdressers. I have one that went self employed so now she comes to me to cut my hair. Wouldn't trust anyone else so hope she never changes careers!!

Bexster

CRANKY40

I've been married...then widowed and I'm in no hurry to repeat the experience. I loved the late MrC but he was away a lot with work - 4 to 5 months at a time. I'm not sure I could live full time with another adult. Our way of life suited us both. If I'd never met MrC I would still have had my own home as I had a mortgage and a flat when I met him (rather late in life compared to some).

I wonder round looking.....interesting most of the time. Nearly all of my clothes are black and my hair was teal blue but is now fading to green. I personally don't give a monkey's armpit what anyone thinks of my appearance or my way of life. I'm clean and happy and my son is clean, happy, well fed and shaping up to be as "individual" as his parents.

I feel sorry for anyone who wants to judge any of us here as lacking anything. We're all doing the best we can to make a decent, happy life for ourselves. That's a good thing and you don't need a "significant other" to do that.

mum2one

Byatt - Sorry to hear about the vision, glad there proactive and getting things sorted, thinking about the cane, reminded me of something DD would say, dont forget the shaky hands, "its called the market syndrome".... when someone gets on my nerves. cuts me up etc then the shaky hand starts and the crutch moves....

We survived the 1st week of the school holidays, thou it was up and down, we had a week in Wales, I picked up tummy bug (cheese on pizza), Dad had the check up with his surgeon, he's got concerns and is now waiting for the results of his mri scan, but thats not till November...

Escaping to Blackpool 2mor till Fri, picked up a cheap break, pre-booked some excursions, should be a nice time.

xx

ellie99

CRANKY40 wrote: »

I've been married...then widowed and I'm in no hurry to repeat the experience. I loved the late MrC but he was away a lot with work - 4 to 5 months at a time. I'm not sure I could live full time with another adult. Our way of life suited us both. If I'd never met MrC I would still have had my own home as I had a mortgage and a flat when I met him (rather late in life compared to some).

I wonder round looking.....interesting most of the time. Nearly all of my clothes are black and my hair was teal blue but is now fading to green. I personally don't give a monkey's armpit what anyone thinks of my appearance or my way of life. I'm clean and happy and my son is clean, happy, well fed and shaping up to be as "individual" as his parents.

I feel sorry for anyone who wants to judge any of us here as lacking anything. We're all doing the best we can to make a decent, happy life for ourselves. That's a good thing and you don't need a "significant other" to do that.

What a great post Cranky...we can't do better than "doing the best we can".

And teal blue hair, sounds marvellous
A few years ago I put pink highlights in my hair...teenage son and mother were not impressed :rotfl:
Sometimes I fancy a complete change of colour (usually red), but I've never had the courage.

I've had lots of puppy cuddles tonight, I wish I had just a fraction of the energy that dog has got!

JustKeepSwimming_2

Sorry to hear about the sight loss Horace, & about the dog experience - that sounds very, very scary. I'm not a huge dog fan & often fret when I see a big dog out without an owner - never had a problem as they've either been quite friendly & licky, or they've just ignored me. Very different when its in your own garden though, that's just not on.

bexster1975 wrote: »

I think it's because coupled up people are uncomfortable with single people. Single women are a particular menace apparently! It's a pity as I know quite a few couples who wish they were anything but. Often due to finance, but also due to fear, people stay together however unhappy they make each other.

I was reading a while ago that the " problem" with women choosing to be single in their thirties and beyond is so bad in China that the government have taken to referring to this group of women as the " leftover women". Imagine a regime so terrified of single women that they have to give the whole group a disparaging name! The women there are not bothered, they live with friends or alone, have good jobs, earn their own money and date men as they choose. Seems difficult to knock it as a way of life really

Bexster

I get told fairly regularly that if I just smartened myself up a bit, or dressed in a more girly, fashionable way & wore make up, then I'd probably get a boy friend. Gotta love my friends, eh....(Not sue if I should be outraged at the only probably getting a boyfriend comment, even if I really smartened myself up the underlying thread is that there could still be something inherently wrong with me for being single ).

Yes, I'm certainly not the sharpest dresser around, but they all seem to think that I must be unhappy in my single life, which isn't true. And what I wear certainly doesn't have any bearing on whether I'm single - it usually depends on what is clean, doesn't need ironing & is comfortable when I'm dashing around.

I quite like the thought of living with a female friend (or more) once all the kids have flown the nest - don't know if it will happen, but I thinks it preferable to living with a partner (for me).

Didn't realise I was part of a group that could be seen as subversive, or dangerous to society :rotfl:

CRANKY40 wrote: »

I've been married...then widowed and I'm in no hurry to repeat the experience. I loved the late MrC but he was away a lot with work - 4 to 5 months at a time. I'm not sure I could live full time with another adult. Our way of life suited us both. If I'd never met MrC I would still have had my own home as I had a mortgage and a flat when I met him (rather late in life compared to some).

I wonder round looking.....interesting most of the time. Nearly all of my clothes are black and my hair was teal blue but is now fading to green. I personally don't give a monkey's armpit what anyone thinks of my appearance or my way of life. I'm clean and happy and my son is clean, happy, well fed and shaping up to be as "individual" as his parents.

I feel sorry for anyone who wants to judge any of us here as lacking anything. We're all doing the best we can to make a decent, happy life for ourselves. That's a good thing and you don't need a "significant other" to do that.

How are you getting on with the blue hair Cranky? DD has just had hers done last week (bleached then dyed) & she loves it so much she doesn't want to wash it in case it fades horribly. There are a few greenish streaks where the bleach didn't completely lift the old red dye, but the whole effect is fab. How often do you have to redo the blue?

ellie99 wrote: »

What a great post Cranky...we can't do better than "doing the best we can".

And teal blue hair, sounds marvellous
A few years ago I put pink highlights in my hair...teenage son and mother were not impressed :rotfl:
Sometimes I fancy a complete change of colour (usually red), but I've never had the courage.

I've had lots of puppy cuddles tonight, I wish I had just a fraction of the energy that dog has got!

Blonde eh, Ellie? How exciting - I'm still mouse brown with grey streaks, but am hoping the get around to dying it a slightly darker brown next week to cover the grey (wow, aren't I exciting). I've been blonde (too much upkeep) & red (think it would make me look too washed out now) but not tried anything very exciting.

Am trying to do the best that I can, but feeling a little fed up with battling on several fronts . Can't seem to get any plumbers out to even look at the shower - they seem to want to fit a completely new shower straight off without considering that the old one may be fixable. Must be because there's more money in it for them, but I can't help feeling a bit ripped off before I start. I phoned 5 on Thursday - 3 haven't even bothered to get back to me & the other 2 seem to want to cash in as 1 of them has even said he thinks the problem may be the boiler (my shower runs off the boiler). I know this isn't the case since the water flows quite happily through the pipes at the correct temperature & pressure - its just the bit from the pipes onwards into the mixer unit & then the hose. But when I told him all this he said it didn't necessarily work like that :mad:

Oh, really? bet he wouldn't have dared to say that to a man :mad:

So were still managing with the over the bath shower, which is playing havoc with my back. Honestly, how hard can it be to find a decent tradesman?

Tried to have a long chat with Mother last night - not very successfully as she moaned about everything for over half an hour. There's quite a bit of work that needs doing on her house, but she can't bring herself to do much about it & hasn't for some time now. I've suggested I organise a few people to come & give quotes (since I'm so good at it :rotfl:) then all she has to do is be there, but she says she may be out. She's struggling with the house & garden, & is just tending to live in 3 of the rooms. I've broached the whole warden controlled flat setup, but she won't hear of it, & obviously I can't force her to.

I've tried the wouldn't it be better to investigate other ways of living now, rather than wait until a change is forced on her (& it will come, as she's 79 & getting frail) but she might as well be sticking her fingers in her ears & going laa laa laa.There is a limit to what I can do being so far away & not driving, but it looks like I'll just have to pick up the pieces when it all goes wrong

Really stumped how to handle her situation - I understand why she doesn't want to think about it, but that attitude won't help her in the long run.

3forholidays

Hi everyone :wave:

Back from my holiday in South Devon.

Horace Sorry about the vision loss. It must have been so alarming to be confronted by the dogs. I have hearing problems and hate people who cycle on pavements - I don't hear them. At least if you use a white stick people will be aware you have a vision problem - it is not so obvious when you have hearing aids (even though I have the standard NHS behind the ear ones).

I'd really like a chauffeur as I don't drive ... Thinking about it I've already got one ... My dad Is it greedy to want another one as a spare?

Weddings are a nightmare for me as a single person as you can't engage anyone in conversation because they can't hear you due to the music. :mad: I don't have anyone to go with so have to go to family weddings on my own and spend the night staring into space wishing I was at home watching TV!

JKS Sounds like your mum is scared of losing her independence and perhaps doesn't want to admit that she might benefit from some assistance. Regarding the works needed to the house and garden, could your mum be worried about the cost?

Keep well everyone!

BookWorm

Hi everyone

It's lovely to be at home and not have to dash off somewhere this week ... normal routine has been resumed...

I'm another one who has been having tradesman troubles. I have used a particular plumber for the last couple of years to do a few jobs including servicing the boiler. He's been fine and I've had no issues. However, this year he's just gone off the radar. Been trying to contact him without success since early June - via phone, text and emails. I finally gave up last week and decided to find a new one. I managed to get a short list of two and have picked the one after making enquiries locally and with the boiler company (he's noted on their site as a recommended engineer) He's coming tomorrow so fingers crossed he's ok (assuming he turns up of course!)

Horace - sorry about the vision deterioration and hugs for your scare with the dogs

Ellie - have you got used to your new haircut yet?

BW

ellie99

JKS, sympathies for trying to help your mum and getting nowhere, it's difficult, isn't it? Sometimes all you can do is pick up the pieces.

You do make me laugh...of course if you put something girly on the men will be falling over themselves :rotfl:
I'm sure your friends mean well, but really, who would want a partner who doesn't like it when you dress like yourself?

3forholidays wrote: »

I'd really like a chauffeur as I don't drive ... Thinking about it I've already got one ... My dad Is it greedy to want another one as a spare?

no, not greedy at all :rotfl:

BookWorm wrote: »

Ellie - have you got used to your new haircut yet?

BookWorm, I'm just not looking in the mirror!

Byatt

My counsellor said, look at you Byatt...pause...you'd think you were in your 90's...:eek: admittedly I was in my work gear...well, casual, comfortable...couldn't care less look...but

I was a bit sad for a few hours after, not a good thing from a counsellor to produce, and considered briefly taking myself in hand, but then I thought...!!!!!!...I'm ok with the way I look. Well except for wanting to lose weight, have thicker hair and longer legs...;)

Aside from that...uhmmm...being 20 years younger...:p

She did suggest a dating site too...this was me :eek::eek::eek::eek::rotfl:

elona

Maybe she thought a makeover would make you feel better about yourself?

Trying to be charitable about her intentions, but what kind of a fool thinks insulting someone is beneficial?