OS Singlies - We Do It Our Way!

BookWorm

Byatt - could have sworn I saw a post from you saying you had read The Book Thief - but now I can't see it

If I am not imagining it - what did you think?

If I have imagined it... then :rotfl: and move on nothing to see here :rotfl:

lulabelle

Thanks guys. This has really made me feel a lot better. I know what you mean re whether it's settling or not calicocat - I guess I've had relationships which were much "better" (one or two of which I was the one to screw up in) so comparing against my own yardstick I think I was settling

2 of my closest friends said they didn't think it was the right guy for me since whilst he was "nice" and everything he just didn't have much "oomph". One of those friends said "I never saw him make you laugh and he was quiet". His conversations were the same every time as well. I think I may have got bored in years to come and let's face it, once you've been together a few years the sex dries up so you need someone who is going to interest you and make you laugh

I wonder if really I was buying into the whole "yay, someone who will give me a family" scenario. The reality of that though is that kids are hard work and put a strain on the best of relationships, let alone the ones which aren't exactly pumping from the start

JustKeepSwimming_2

Byatt wrote: »

...I seem to open my mouth and put my foot in it, so have decided not to open my mouth, for some time. :cool:

Is there a retreat somewhere where you can go and not talk?

I'll be on the train next to you going to that retreat Byatt :rotfl: I seem to have a knack of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time & if I'm out with a certain group of women I do stay very quiet, sometimes I don't even say a word apart from hello & bye as I'm so worried I'll upset someone (unintentionally - I don't go out of my way to be rude, but sometimes it just happens).

Sorry to hear the FB admin didn't work out but at least its one less thing to do....

BookWorm wrote: »

JKS - I had to give myself a stern talking to but think I've got the spending urge under control :rotfl:
Getting there with things thanks

I've had a pretty quiet day. Got all my chores done this morning and have spent this afternoon watching films. I have watched Dallas Buyers Club and The Book Thief. Both very different but enjoyable.
Anyone else seen them and if so what did you think?

Not seen either of them BW. I did mean to see The Book Thief, but wanted to read the book first - not got around to that either yet

calicocat wrote: »

...So, i've changed the bed last night, all nice and clean and fresh.

Asbo this morning is purring away sat on windowsill in the sun......then it starts....that (don't know how to spell it)....hurgh, hurgh, hurgh.

Then a projectile vomited hair ball plus a bit of sick lands on the bed!!.......really???

Don't you just love cats.......

They just know, don't they?

Lulabelle - sorry that you're floundering with this single thing & I've no advice as LB & others have said what I would say, & said it more eloquently than I could.

I do understand how much the losing his family hurts though. I'm an only child & have always had a very difficult relationship with my mother, & virtually no relationship with anyone on her side of the family as she fell out with all of them when I was young. I've tried to make amends with them myself, but as money & property were involved, they don't want to know me either . Probably not really a great loss if they're such good grudge holders, but I rarely see the few relatives I have on my Dad's side either. That is due partly to distance & partly because I have children & 2 of my 3 cousins either cant have them, or have really struggled to have one & have gone slightly mad (for want of a better word) & have tried to cut those with children out of their lives. Which makes the weddings & funerals I'm invited to fun :whistle:

So my OH's families became surrogate families to me, & splitting up has been awful as I've lost them too. Losing the last family hurt more than losing the guy TBH, & I still miss them dreadfully even though its been ages. For me its another reason why I think I'll be single for ever as I'll be thinking long & hard about getting involved with anyone else again - it just hurts too much when it all goes pear shaped.

I walked for miles today & enjoyed the weather so I'm off to soak in a clean bath (another benefit of no kids for a while) with a Lush bath bomb glass of red - bliss.

JustKeepSwimming_2

BookWorm wrote: »

Byatt - could have sworn I saw a post from you saying you had read The Book Thief - but now I can't see it

If I am not imagining it - what did you think?

If I have imagined it... then :rotfl: and move on nothing to see here :rotfl:

I think you're imagining it :laugh:

lulabelle wrote: »

Thanks guys. This has really made me feel a lot better. I know what you mean re whether it's settling or not calicocat - I guess I've had relationships which were much "better" (one or two of which I was the one to screw up in) so comparing against my own yardstick I think I was settling

2 of my closest friends said they didn't think it was the right guy for me since whilst he was "nice" and everything he just didn't have much "oomph". One of those friends said "I never saw him make you laugh and he was quiet". His conversations were the same every time as well. I think I may have got bored in years to come and let's face it, once you've been together a few years the sex dries up so you need someone who is going to interest you and make you laugh

I wonder if really I was buying into the whole "yay, someone who will give me a family" scenario. The reality of that though is that kids are hard work and put a strain on the best of relationships, let alone the ones which aren't exactly pumping from the start

Sounds like he certainly wasn't the one for you Lulabelle & you've had a lucky escape from a potentially unhappy-in-the-end relationship. Your last paragraph rings a loud bell with me - kids do put horrendous strain on a relationship & they're incredibly hard work (as well as wonderful). Its also jolly hard work being a single parent - ask me how I know all this :rotfl:

BookWorm

JustKeepSwimming wrote: »

I think you're imagining it :laugh:

Nothing would surprise me! I can recommend the film though it was good.


Re: the family thing - you have us now

Byatt

Sorry BW and JKS, I deleted it. Just feeling very unsure of myself at the moment, so very jittery.

I loved the book BW, the reason I read it was because I saw the film trailer. I will probably read it again, but the message behind it is quite subtle in a way (to me anyway)....but when it hits you, it makes a lot of sense. Not sure how the film would work because of course Death is the narrator.

JKS, we can sit on the same train and not talk. I'm ok about not being admin, it was grim, just the way the other admin (who I'd thought of as new friends) responded to me, as what I'd said written down was just misinterpreted. My intention in my own head was very different when read by them. and because I'm overly emotional just now, I walked!

BookWorm

Awww hugs Byatt xx

JustKeepSwimming_2

BookWorm wrote: »

Nothing would surprise me! I can recommend the film though it was good.


Re: the family thing - you have us now

Aw thanks BW :j

Byatt wrote: »

Sorry BW and JKS, I deleted it. Just feeling very unsure of myself at the moment, so very jittery.

I loved the book BW, the reason I read it was because I saw the film trailer. I will probably read it again, but the message behind it is quite subtle in a way (to me anyway)....but when it hits you, it makes a lot of sense. Not sure how the film would work because of course Death is the narrator.

JKS, we can sit on the same train and not talk. I'm ok about not being admin, it was grim, just the way the other admin (who I'd thought of as new friends) responded to me, as what I'd said written down was just misinterpreted. My intention in my own head was very different when read by them. and because I'm overly emotional just now, I walked!

Bless you Byatt :grouphug: have a dodgy hug. It can all get a bit much sometimes, can't it?

About the film/book thing - I've always felt I must read the book first before seeing the film (no idea how this got into my head, but its firmly there). As I'm what could be described as time poor :rotfl: I'm slowly, slowly coming around to maybe skipping the book & going straight to the film :eek: - what do you think? Seems so wrong.... but if I don't I'll end up not reading/seeing anything.

BookWorm

I have got more relaxed about the book/film thing as I've got older and now just watch or read whatever comes first - saves all the worrying about it!

calicocat

Byatt wrote: »

Sorry BW and JKS, I deleted it. Just feeling very unsure of myself at the moment, so very jittery.

I loved the book BW, the reason I read it was because I saw the film trailer. I will probably read it again, but the message behind it is quite subtle in a way (to me anyway)....but when it hits you, it makes a lot of sense. Not sure how the film would work because of course Death is the narrator.

JKS, we can sit on the same train and not talk. I'm ok about not being admin, it was grim, just the way the other admin (who I'd thought of as new friends) responded to me, as what I'd said written down was just misinterpreted. My intention in my own head was very different when read by them. and because I'm overly emotional just now, I walked!

Then they weren't for you...it really isn't worth worrying about. I think forums can be funny and sometimes dodgy places.


So you'll have to come back and play here.