OS Singlies - We Do It Our Way!

BookWorm

Evening all

Feeling a bit brain dead tonight (long day at work) and so nothing of much note to say. Just catching up on what I missed today and wanted to let you know I'm here.

Have a nice night everyone x

singlestep

BookWorm wrote: »

Evening all

Feeling a bit brain dead tonight (long day at work) and so nothing of much note to say. Just catching up on what I missed today and wanted to let you know I'm here.

Have a nice night everyone x

Hello, BW. I felt much the same yesterday but had to continue working once home. Rest, relax and feel better soon.

Think a major drawback of being single or living alone is that in such circumstances there's nobody to bring you tea or chocolate and either commiserate or tell you that you've had enough for one day. I'm terrible for not recognising my limits.

I had a busier day today and even more home with me but I don't feel so bad.

BookWorm

singlestep wrote: »

Hello, BW. I felt much the same yesterday but had to continue working once home. Rest, relax and feel better soon.

Think a major drawback of being single or living alone is that in such circumstances there's nobody to bring you tea or chocolate and either commiserate or tell you that you've had enough for one day. I'm terrible for not recognising my limits.

I had a busier day today and even more home with me but I don't feel so bad.

Thanks Singlestep

I think you are right about that and it's often those little things I notice and/or miss most.
Thank goodness for virtual 'families' eh?

Hope you can find some time to chill yourself later on
x

Byatt

debtfreefuture wrote: »

On a totally different topic.................

How much do you singlies spend on "housekeeping" in a week?
I budget for £60. This does seem excessive when I look at the OS board and people manage to live on £25 per week - but then again my £60 incorporates everything I buy, including hair colouring, deodorant, body moisturiser, vitamins etc. I usually only go shopping once a week (at the weekend) and only keep about £3 in my purse (left over from the said £60) for odds and sods in the week.

I am currently trying for £30 a month :eek:, but it is fluid. I have stocks in and some vouchers I can use for a couple of months. It doesn't include cat food, but I try to find the best deal, currently using Ama$on, as my boy is fussy about food. I haven't spent £60 a week for years, well since being divorced. I use money off coupons where I can and often shop around those. I don't buy a lot of toiletries though or vitamins.

melanzana

Im a singleton in the prime of life, I.e. getting bleddy older by the day!

I have a lovely partner but we don't live together....secret to a blissful relationship IMO! He lives in the country, I in the city and we have one night pw and every weekend together, in one place or the other alternately.

So as for food budgeting, well. I do the cooking for both of us at weekends, and myself during the week. Pay back is a lovely meal out during the week, and on one of the weekend nights!

At the moment I spend about 50 on food pw.
I bring my own lunch to work. Just prefer my own stuff.
I use Aldi primarily for most things, and M+S for a treat now and then , and for the Cornish Cruncher extra mature cheddar. Nothing else will do!

I live in the city, so don't have a car. Use OH as taxi if required! That saves an absolute fortune.

I do like my red wine, do that luxury costs another 20 pw. Eeek!

I am working FT at the moment, but am moving to three weeks on and one week off in February (was doing that but had to go back ft recently). I am taking an early retirement package in August God willing, so am trying to get used to a MUCH reduced pay on the work pension!

Just reading back what I wrote, I realise I am a lucky girl. Never really thought about my circumstances much, but now that I have, I'm not going to complain for awhile!

I am a bit concerned about the much reduced income in August, but I've done my sums and am sure I will be ok. No kids, no car, no mortgage or debts, well I am in much better position than many, and am thankful for that.

But have had tragedies in my family aswell, so life has it downsides aswell. Nothing is ever perfect.

Sorry, I've had a bit of a wander there.

Is anyone else in a similar position to me?

Love the thread, but don't always have time to post.

VfM4meplse

Mrs_Bones wrote: »

If you've not got any close kith and kin such as children I think charities that are close to your heart are a perfect place to leave money too. Much better for them to have it than the government which is what would happen to it if you died without a will and no next of kin to claim.

Much better to keep giving it away whilst you're alive, and get pleasure that way rather than the estate being exposed to IHT. Owning property can mean it could easily exceed the threshold without you realising it.

Mrs_Bones wrote: »

Now I see it as just being organized and like you say taking at least some of the stress away from love ones.

I actually think it helps with the grieving process for your loved ones to focus on the task of arranging the funeral, and for that reason I won't be making arrangements for myself. I will however leave quite specific instructions as to what is required, including a list of random and obscure items to be gathered and slung in the coffin (none of which I want or need), so they'll be too busy cursing me to remember to cry!

Mrs_Bones

VfM4meplse wrote: »

I actually think it helps with the grieving process for your loved ones to focus on the task of arranging the funeral, and for that reason I won't be making arrangements for myself. I will however leave quite specific instructions as to what is required, including a list of random and obscure items to be gathered and slung in the coffin (none of which I want or need), so they'll be too busy cursing me to remember to cry!

On the two funerals I've arranged I'm happy that I knew the wishes of my mum and godmother re their funeral. I personally found it very helpful and I know they got the send off they wanted, which helped me on another level.

As far as me personally I not sure I'll have close loved ones as such when I pass on. At most it will be cousins and my godchildren as far as family goes. All of whom I care about but we don't live in each other pockets so I know they won't really understand specifically what I'd want. That's without the added complication of me following a Pagan faith and them being Christian. The last thing I want is a Christian funeral. I guess that's the whole point about being single, there is less chance of there being any real close loved ones to sort things out. The people who know what I'd like for my funeral are the two I trust most, and neither are the kind to go weeping and wailing both being of a practical nature.

I know through experience that leaving directions about your wishes is by no means a guarantee you'll get it done that way but at least it's a start. I always regret that my grandfather didn't get his last wishes but I was young at the time and over ruled by a family who didn't think it was 'quite the done thing'. I guess that's why I was determined that my mum and godmum got their wishes. Even then some of the family raised their eyes at my mum's funeral, but I was old enough to stand my ground by then.

calicocat

Mrs_Bones wrote: »

On the two funerals I've arranged I'm happy that I knew the wishes of my mum and godmother re their funeral. I personally found it very helpful and I know they got the send off they wanted, which helped me on another level.

As far as me personally I not sure I'll have close loved ones as such when I pass on. At most it will be cousins and my godchildren as far as family goes. All of whom I care about but we don't live in each other pockets so I know they won't really understand specifically what I'd want. That's without the added complication of me following a Pagan faith and them being Christian. The last thing I want is a Christian funeral. I guess that's the whole point about being single, there is less chance of there being any real close loved ones to sort things out. The people who know what I'd like for my funeral are the two I trust most, and neither are the kind to go weeping and wailing both being of a practical nature.

I know through experience that leaving directions about your wishes is by no means a guarantee you'll get it done that way but at least it's a start. I always regret that my grandfather didn't get his last wishes but I was young at the time and over ruled by a family who didn't think it was 'quite the done thing'. I guess that's why I was determined that my mum and godmum got their wishes. Even then some of the family raised their eyes at my mum's funeral, but I was old enough to stand my ground by then.

The two friends I have looking after my 'affairs' once i"m gone are very strong people, and also know me inside out , and am lucky to have them. Due to this I haven't felt the need as yet to specify any funeral arrangements. I've always figured they know me so well that they'll know what to do and what ever they do will be fine by me...and if they get it wrong i'll pop back in and haunt them for a while....and I might now i'm thinking about it request a track or two as I think a random tune wouldn't go amiss....but if i'm honest i don't really think much about the actual funeral, and if I did i'd be more likely to stipulate the buffet being a foodie.

calicocat

VfM4meplse wrote: »

Much better to keep giving it away whilst you're alive, and get pleasure that way rather than the estate being exposed to IHT. Owning property can mean it could easily exceed the threshold without you realising it.

Nice idea, up until you find you need to pay for your care when elderly?...this is also something people (single or not) need to think about now....if you want a choice of where you go that is.

Mrs_Bones

calicocat wrote: »

The two friends I have looking after my 'affairs' once i"m gone are very strong people, and also know me inside out , and am lucky to have them. Due to this I haven't felt the need as yet to specify any funeral arrangements. I've always figured they know me so well that they'll know what to do and what ever they do will be fine by me...and if they get it wrong i'll pop back in and haunt them for a while....and I might now i'm thinking about it request a track or two as I think a random tune wouldn't go amiss....but if i'm honest i don't really think much about the actual funeral, and if I did i'd be more likely to stipulate the buffet being a foodie.

Oh I've already told my two friends if I go before them I'll be popping back to do the odd haunt if I get the chance, I don't think they'd expect anything different off me. :rotfl:

When I say I've sorted my funeral it is only the sort of funeral I want ie pagan if possible, which if I fall of my perch tomorrow I know it could be arrange as such people are in my circle of friends but who knows about the future so a humanist funeral would be a happy compromise. I've also noted some readings and music I'd like etc but that's as far as it goes. Much like my mum who told me what music she didn't want, the dress code she did want and a few other little quirks she'd like but the rest was left to me.

My godmother on the other hand arranged hers in much more detail, even down to the wording she wanted on the headstone and the caterers for the wake afterwards at the church hall. As well as all the music and readings etc. I guess the difference was that many of us don't really want to think of our demise in that great a detail but she had terminal cancer and I guess that sort of thing tends to crystallize things a bit more than most. It may seem strange but I think arranging things herself gave her some sort of peace and kept her busy in an odd way.