Noisy people in flat above me.

Twisted_Cherry

pimento wrote: »

If the flats are the same size and the OP and noisy neighbour have the same landlord, the ideal solution would be for them to swap flats.

That was suggested to me, but it was not practical due to medical reasons.

dodger1

notanewuser wrote: »

We spend a lot of time out of the home (a detached house).

However, with the best will in the world I can't/don't want to "control" my daughter. She can be sitting quietly doing a jigsaw puzzle when a high pitched squeal of excitement at completing it will escape from her. I can't stop it, but were I in a flat or somewhere else where it could cause an issue I would explain to her calmly why that behaviour wasn't appropriate or kind to whoever it affected. I can't physically stop her from doing it without some sort of gag, and I don't want to squash her excitement at having achieved something (she completes puzzles for age 5+ so puts quite a lot of effort into it!).

If we were in a flat I would explain to her why stamping around or banging saucepans wasn't very thoughtful to others around us, but I wouldn't tie her hands or feet together to physically stop her doing it.

dodger1 wrote: »

Actually it's quite easy to do if the parent can be bothered to interact with their child. There are times when you can let them run riot on their own and you can just watch, there are also times when you introduce learning games which can be fairly quiet.

notanewuser wrote: »

Or not. As per my example above.

With the jigsaw example that's absolutely fine, she's been playing quietly and then gets excited when the job is done. With the saucepans, well if your daughter does what she likes and doesn't take any notice from her parents (something wrong there though) then put the saucepans out of her each, problem solved.

Stamping around, nothing wrong in a house but if you lived in an upstairs flat you'd control the amount by doing as I said, interact and find something else for her to do.

dodger1

GwylimT wrote: »

My nine month old is crying because he isn't too keen on his breathing tube and as he does quite often he has given it a good yank and hurt himself, but now all I need to do is tell him to be quiet and it will work a treat.

That's a baby, OP's story is about a three year old, completely different situation.

dodger1

Frankly I don't believe bedtime is an issue as long as the child gets enough sleep and there is some kind of a routine. The issue is noise, all children, well the vast majority, will be noisy at times and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

The problem is that some parents will just let their children run riot at all times simply because it's too much bother to spend time with their kids playing with them just for fun or using educational toys.

OP states that for two weeks the noise was unbearable, if we believe OP then that sounds like a child out of control without any parental guidance. If we don't believe OP then why comment in the first place.

rosyw

Twisted_Cherry wrote: »

Your child's mother sounds identical to the one I tried to help!

For many reasons I did NOT go into detail about what did / did not happen. I DID report the family to Social Services. I also reported them for benefit fraud since her partner was living there and working but they failed to declare it (I know this to be a fact not an educated guess!) They in turn made my life hell, both at home and in work.

Because I did stand my ground this family and others made the lives hell for me and others living in the area who ALSO made reports to the housing and police. As I result I became very ill, and I had to leave my job because of them, and eventually I moved away from my home after years of begging for a move! Several bad families all tried to say 'we' were the ones with the problems, but add up how many people moved away because of this family and others where I lived, you can clearly see who were the trouble makers. It was named the close from hell in my eyes!

AND for the record, I also wrote to the school the child went to, but the Head Teacher failed to reply, so it was clear the authorities really cared!

If I feel something is wrong, or someone is at risk I would always report it, regardless of the outcome expected. However reporting this family resulted in them subjecting me to many years of abuse, which resulted in my health taking a turn for the worse, to the point of a suicide attempt. I was desperate to move out of where I live, but no one would help, and 'THIS' family tormented me AND got away with it.

The child in question ended up in a 'Special Needs' School because of his behaviour.

So please because someone comments, don't make the assumption they sat back and did nothing! At the end of the day some families care for there children, whilst others don't give a toss what they get up to.

Apologies if I caused offence, it wasn't intentional, but at present this is a subject very close to my heart and tends to make me "go off on one"!

It sickens me that it seems almost impossible to get anyone to listen and take action when children are in situations such as this, and kids that haven't stood a chance from day one are the ones that suffer the most.

slenderkitten

unfortunately i am experienced in this,

1 any conversations you have with the neighbors secretly RECORD it, you never know what they say may help your case, careful of what you say you want them to TRIP themselves up.

2. speak to their landlord

3 speak to environmental health ensure you have kept a couple of weeks diaries before speaking to them, if possible, they will ask you to do this anyway. If deemed necessary they will put you down for a recording instrument (they are useless anyway) at which you keep a diary to go along side the recording. WARNING they will tell the neighbour in question that a recording instrument will be going in the next 4 months, they have to BY LAW! Stupid i know.

In this case if you have a smart phone try recording them using a an audio app, along side the environmental health dept own recording - i have been through all of this three times, where there instrument didn't record anything its not strong enough and that my iphone recorded alot more.

But it's likely the environmental dept will say that they cant do much, Ive dealt with far worse than a kid jumping around etc until 10 pm, meaning noise going on all through the night and got NOWHERE, I've moved 3 times to get way from it.

I would suggest that you save up HARD and move elsewhere so you are above other people, but be careful of those who are at the side of you and if you are bedroom to bedroom.

On the other hand you may get your way, but by all means DONT do nothing. in the very least consider ANNOYING them with noise; fight fire with fire, that is the one thing i did NOT do and should have done instead of listening to what my housing officer (council housing) told me.

thequant

I've had the same problem, ground floor flat, young child above with parents who didn't give a fly fkcu.


Noise went on till same time I went to bed and was eventually affecting my mental health.


After trying the reasonable route which didn't not work I was left with no other option but to stop getting mad but get even.


The only way to make these people understand what you are going through is to make their lives a misery.


Turn that music up! Bang on the ceiling! 2 am in the morning? wake that kid up!


Let them know how you feel, it's the only way.


Does it work ? Yes it does!

Twisted_Cherry

rosyw wrote: »

Apologies if I caused offence, it wasn't intentional, but at present this is a subject very close to my heart and tends to make me "go off on one"!

It sickens me that it seems almost impossible to get anyone to listen and take action when children are in situations such as this, and kids that haven't stood a chance from day one are the ones that suffer the most.

I know the feeling. I cannot stand to see children being mistreated, and I have witnessed it all too often!

I can relate to the 'going off on one...' very much!

Twisted_Cherry

thequant wrote: »

Turn that music up! Bang on the ceiling! 2 am in the morning? wake that kid up!

Ha Ha I can relate! I turned to banging on the ceiling in the early hours when they kept me awake... I also used my computer in the early hours of the morning and played music through it as the room was directly under the child's room. I reached a point where revenge was the only option!

Me and my neighbours exchanged several letters... thinking back now it was rather comical, but at the time it really did affect my mental health, to the point I flipped out one evening after a letter they sent me and I got very drunk, cranked up the music and started banging on there door - think I scared them a little... then the police and ambulance took me away, I officially had reached breaking point with the neighbours and spent 4 weeks in hospital - which whilst not great, gave me some much needed space from my horrible neighbours!

Norman_Castle

We should start a thread called "Revenge is Sweet". I find I can fall asleep with the TV or radio on very loud if I wear earplugs. If the problem neighbor is a drunk, being noisy when they are, is generally pointless. Wait until they are sober, early mornings are good, then enjoy your music or knock their door at 7AM to ask them to keep the noise down. One current noisy idiot is being entertained with Radio 4 throughout the night on a timer which switches on and off at 1/2 hour intervals whenever he causes me problems. It seems to be working.
Don't get mad. Get even.:D