Noisy people in flat above me.

dodger1

notanewuser wrote: »

How - without gagging them and tying them to a chair - do you control the noise a young child makes??

Actually it's quite easy to do if the parent can be bothered to interact with their child. There are times when you can let them run riot on their own and you can just watch, there are also times when you introduce learning games which can be fairly quiet.

notanewuser

dodger1 wrote: »

Actually it's quite easy to do if the parent can be bothered to interact with their child. There are times when you can let them run riot on their own and you can just watch, there are also times when you introduce learning games which can be fairly quiet.

Or not. As per my example above.

Soleil_lune

Twisted_Cherry wrote: »

Entertain them, as parents it's your responsibility to be in control of your children's welfare, not let them rule the roost!

Can't ever remember being a child who caused 'problems' for neighbours, we played, but we played and had respect for others.

If you have a child in a flat, take him / her to the park, let them run off the excess energy, by the time they are home they might just fall sleep!

Completely agree. It never ceases to amaze me how some people think it's OK to let their children run riot, squeal and hollar, and just generally make life very unpleasant for anyone and everyone around them, whilst citing that they are NOT prepared to attempt to control or discipline them, they're 'just being children,' and that it's not their fault that they are up til 10 or 11pm... yada yada yada.

10-11pm is FAR too late a bedtime for a small child, and they cannot possibly be getting the amount of sleep they need. Even at the age of 10 or 11, I was in bed for 9pm FGS. In many cases, children like the one the OP is having a problem with, who have ridiculously late bedtimes, and parents who don't care, become undisciplined and unruly children/teenagers. Of COURSE, there has to be a certain amount of natural and uncontrollable noise from small children, but this is unreasonable. A child of 3 up til 10pm? Ridiculous. But I am sure the mother thinks SHE is doing nothing wrong, and her child is a perfect little angel!

It worries me that people actually think these things, and think that their parenting is absolutely fine. I agree with dodger, some parents just can't be bothered to interact with their own children, or teach them right from wrong, and get extremely defensive when they're called out on it. Bit worrying really.

I sincerely hope OP that you get this sorted. I also hope that sometime in the future, this inconsiderate woman who clearly cannot control her own children, ends up with noisy neighbours too sometime soon.

melanzana

Children, loud music, footsteps, talking, singing, drinking, banging pots, snoring, should be BANNED in flats. Completely.

I am just saying.....

Flat living is a compromise for all. Some don't get that, and that's where the problems arise.

Children will grow up, but many adults don't or won't either.

notanewuser

Soleil_lune wrote: »

Completely agree. It never ceases to amaze me how some people think it's OK to let their children run riot, squeal and hollar, and just generally make life very unpleasant for anyone and everyone around them, whilst citing that they are NOT prepared to attempt to control or discipline them, they're 'just being children,' and that it's not their fault that they are up til 11pm.

10-11pm is FAR too late a bedtime for a small child, and they cannot possibly be getting the amount of sleep they need. Even at the age of 10 or 11, I was in bed for 9pm FGS. In many cases, children like the one the OP is having a problem with, who have ridiculously late bedtimes, and parents who don't care, become undisciplined and unruly children/teenagers. Of COURSE, there has to be a certain amount of natural and uncontrollable noise from small children, but this is unreasonable. A child of 3 up til 10pm? But I am sure the mother thinks SHE is doing nothing wrong, and her child is a perfect little angel!

It worries me that people actually think these things, and think that their parenting is absolutely fine.

I sincerely hope OP that you get this sorted. I also hope that sometime in the future, this inconsiderate woman who clearly cannot control her own children, ends up with noisy neighbours too sometime soon.

Have you ever BEEN to the continent?

:rotfl:

It is not NORMAL, HEALTHY or in every child's interests to get them into bed early. Parents choose to do that because THEY want their evenings to themselves or because THEY have to get up early for work. Research now proves that trying to get a toddler to sleep at a time out of sync with their natural circadian rhythms is not a good idea.

We spend our evenings as a family, doing all manner of things. We can take her out for meals - even at posh restaurants, we can take her to friends' houses and parties without worrying that she'll misbehave. She gets her 11-12 hours a night, doesn't get tired or stroppy, is advanced for her age and a joy to be around.

My nephew has a strict 6:30pm bedtime and his parents are housebound from 5pm every day. My BIL is lucky if he's home in time to bath him. Doesn't sound like much fun to me.

Its our job to prepare our for adult life, not to squash every joy of childhood out of them.

(During term time we wake DD up at 8:15 4 days a week for playgroup. She's generally in bed asleep by 8:30-9pm but usually sleeps later at weekends and school holidays which leads to a later bedtime.)

GwylimT

Soleil_lune wrote: »

Completely agree. It never ceases to amaze me how some people think it's OK to let their children run riot, squeal and hollar, and just generally make life very unpleasant for anyone and everyone around them, whilst citing that they are NOT prepared to attempt to control or discipline them, they're 'just being children,' and that it's not their fault that they are up til 11pm.

10-11pm is FAR too late a bedtime for a small child, and they cannot possibly be getting the amount of sleep they need. Even at the age of 10 or 11, I was in bed for 9pm FGS. In many cases, children like the one the OP is having a problem with, who have ridiculously late bedtimes, and parents who don't care, become undisciplined and unruly children/teenagers. Of COURSE, there has to be a certain amount of natural and uncontrollable noise from small children, but this is unreasonable. A child of 3 up til 10pm? But I am sure the mother thinks SHE is doing nothing wrong, and her child is a perfect little angel!

It worries me that people actually think these things, and think that their parenting is absolutely fine.

I sincerely hope OP that you get this sorted. I also hope that sometime in the future, this inconsiderate woman who clearly cannot control her own children, ends up with noisy neighbours too sometime soon.

There is nothing wrong with a child going to bed at 10, when our daughter started school part time when she was around 3.5 we put her bedtime earlier as we thought she might be more tired and so need to sleep earlier. It lasted five weeks, she would get herself out of bed at story time and play, the earliest we found her asleep when going in and checking on her was 9:30 pm and she always woke up at around 7.

Now she is at school full time she does goes to sleep earlier, she knows that after story time she can play for ten minutes, but after that she has to stay in bed unless she needs a drink or if she needs to go to the toilet, it isn't uncommon to walk past her room at 9:30 now and she is awake and generally at the moment she wakes up at around 6:30, it is very unusual for her to wake up after 7 am.

If she wasn't getting enough sleep she would likely not be behaving very well due to being tired, she would be struggling in school, she would be sometimes visibly tired/fighting sleep, and she certainly wouldn't be waking up at 6:30 and she wouldn't be sat in bed, sometimes for more than an hour before she goes to sleep.

Twisted_Cherry

I find myself thinking back to the child that had ADHD where I once lived... the child who use to run around it a nappy at 2 years old posting empty yoghurt cartons and spoons through people's doors whilst his mother stood on the step smoking and gossiping to someone else.

Child grew up to be 'out of control' so of course it was much easier to ensure child got a diagnosis of ADHD and mum takes no liability that her parenting skills contributed to child's outlandish and crazy behaviour!

But then of course some of here would think allowing a 2 year old to run around in it's nappy shouting, screaming and being a general nuisance is perfectly ok! It's nice to find a 2 year old posting a yoghurt carton through your postbox!

PasturesNew

I'd guess:

Guest101 wrote: »

1 it's a downside of living in a flat, I'd suggest going for a house next time - they are more expensive
4 why is moving not an option?- to another flat?

When you're on your own you're limited, often, to the cheapest places, which tends to be flats and not houses. There are few 1-bed houses for rent in any case. So to move might not make things any better as it'd still be a flat - and flats potentially have problems with people above/below.

notanewuser

Twisted_Cherry wrote: »

I find myself thinking back to the child that had ADHD where I once lived... the child who use to run around it a nappy at 2 years old posting empty yoghurt cartons and spoons through people's doors whilst his mother stood on the step smoking and gossiping to someone else.

Child grew up to be 'out of control' so of course it was much easier to ensure child got a diagnosis of ADHD and mum takes no liability that her parenting skills contributed to child's outlandish and crazy behaviour!

But then of course some of here would think allowing a 2 year old to run around in it's nappy shouting, screaming and being a general nuisance is perfectly ok! It's nice to find a 2 year old posting a yoghurt carton through your postbox!

Who has said or implied that that is okay?

pimento

If the flats are the same size and the OP and noisy neighbour have the same landlord, the ideal solution would be for them to swap flats.

Has the OP actually confirmed that they are renting?