Sensitive first post

System

As far as I am concerned. Its no ones business other than the woman who is pregnant and the person carrying out the termination.

paulineb_2

Arthien wrote: »

The only other option I could come up with was cap, condom, pill, but a bit of googling suggests hardly anyone uses a cap anymore, so maybe not!

Or vasectomy, sterilisation and a condom just incase theres a tiny chance the operations might have failed.

paulineb_2

pops5588 wrote: »

Sorry Tiddlywinks, I must've missed the post where you gave out your medical qualifications. I certainly don't remember my GP telling me in a single one of our conversations over the last 9 years about contraceptive methods to find 3 different methods and use them in a 'belts and braces' fashion.

Good grief...

Ive never in my entire life when I was on the pill been told by a GP to use more than one method of contraception at the same time. In some situations it makes sense to use barrier contraception as well as the combined pill, but the GP has never chased after me going out the door saying, dont forget the spermicide and when you are at it, you could ask your bf to have a vasectomy as well just incase you end up pregnant.

lostinrates

paulineb wrote: »

Ive never in my entire life when I was on the pill been told by a GP to use more than one method of contraception at the same time. In some situations it makes sense to use barrier contraception as well as the combined pill, but the GP has never chased after me going out the door saying, dont forget the spermicide and when you are at it, you could ask your bf to have a vasectomy as well just incase you end up pregnant.

I have had the talk about the pill being no substitute for condoms in certain situations, And I very strongly agree with it. There are situations where if I were on the pill I would also use condoms. As you say, in some situations it makes sense to use a barrier method too, and while we have increasing incident of sti its safe to say these circumstances aren't being taken seriously enough.

However, they are rather removed from OP's situation of pregnancy.

op, despite all the tangents (which I hope have taken the pressure directly off you) I hope you are as ok as you can be.

Person_one

In new relationships until you're a bit more committed and have both had a sexual health check up, it always makes sense to use a condom regardless of what hormonal method you're also using, but that's for STIs more than pregnancy.

The actual failure rate for most hormonal methods (with perfect use which is admittedly not a given!) is less than 0.5%, for the implant its less than 0.1%!

Prothet_of_Doom

There are a number of issues here.
I haven't read all 18 pages but :

1) It sounds like husband is very controlling, and has manipulated your confused and worried state into believing this in the right thing to do. I'm not saying that he's mean or nasty, because he's probably got his own worries and fears to contend with.
If he was delighted and told you it would be fine, you'd cope, and life would be great, and anyway, nobody actually starves in Britain, would you happily make an alternative choice ?
2) Delay, until you have all the facts.
3) When you have ALL the facts, ask yourself what you'd have to give up? (Holidays? Meat? cars? handbags? the dream house? any house? your health?)
4) Finally, what do you know about adoption ? My wife's brother and his wife, adopted 2 babies (his wife has a genetic issue which meant the likely hood of a healthy baby was 20%. Don't rule this out yet
5) Delay. did I say that? Delay.

mumps

Judi wrote: »

As far as I am concerned. Its no ones business other than the woman who is pregnant and the person carrying out the termination.

Maybe some tax payers feel they are entitled to an opinion if their taxes are paying for it? I have never understood why tax payers are expected to pay for contraception or abortions. When I first when on the pill (over 40 years ago) I had to pay for a private prescription and then pay for the pills. I can't remember what the prescription cost but the months supply of the pill was 11 shillings, 55p, which was ten per cent of a weeks pay. I did struggle to pay some months and can remember months when I started a new pack 12 hrs late as I had to wait till the following morning to get paid before I could get the new pack.

Eventually I got my pills from the Brook, which was free, but I can't remember when it became free on the NHS, I think I changed to the coil before that.

heartbreak_star

mumps wrote: »

I have never understood why tax payers are expected to pay for contraception or abortions.

Because it costs less than having to help support the amount of babies that would be born otherwise?

Because we don't want unwanted babies abandoned at hospitals?

Because we don't want women trying to give themselves abortions via gin or less savoury methods?

I know I prefer my taxes going towards contraception.

HBS x

pops5588

Person_one wrote: »

In new relationships until you're a bit more committed and have both had a sexual health check up, it always makes sense to use a condom regardless of what hormonal method you're also using, but that's for STIs more than pregnancy.

The actual failure rate for most hormonal methods (with perfect use which is admittedly not a given!) is less than 0.5%, for the implant its less than 0.1%!

Absolutely. It's only now that I am in a long term relationship that I am happy to take either just the pill or just have the implant. However when single/dating/in a short term relationship I have always been on the pill and used condoms. But 3 contraceptive methods?!

Unfortunately Tiddlywinks appears to be a little hysterical. First thing that popped into my head:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5xkxTfVLSA

System

I'll stick my neck out here. I think not being able to afford a baby is a poor excuse to have a termination. I think if the majority of people waited till they could afford a baby, the world would be pretty empty.