2014: a selfish year

want_to_save

aw hun hugs

lulabelle

Well I at least worked out yesterday morning and had a no spend day too.

Will run tonight as was so tired I couldn't get up this morning and that was despite going to bed at 9pm last night!

Have a client lunch today so that's on the firm and friend just cancelled cinema for tomorrow night so aiming for 3 NSD's (4 if you include Sunday) apart from paying trainer which is in budget

Buffythedebtslayer

hello Lula,


I have to say I find this age very difficult. I was with someone when I was your age but now I am deeply single, love life is rubbish and I have fears regarding children - do I/did I want them do I not? Aren't I lucky to have the freedom and choice?


However, I am deeply lonely - all my friends have paired up and I really feel it now. I no longer go to my friends' kids birthday party as I am the only one on my own and it is difficult to find stuff to talk about - well that is what I say. What I really feel is it's a room full of what I wanted, couples, kids, houses, holidays, a plan, a future and I don't have it plus being older than you it is likely I won't get it (nothing as depressing as dating statistics!) I tried online dating and it was ok, but overall there just aren't the men! and the one I did date did not end well.


I just wanted to write to say I understand how you feel and yes people do make assumptions and then you think well what message am I giving out here!!


I am giving myself 9 weeks to lose some weight develop some of my old interests and look for a new job. Then I shall have another little foray into online dating.


Part of me is planning for life alone and part of me is hopeful


Hang in there hon XXX

lulabelle

Oh Buffy! Thanks for your reply. How old are you? I totally get what you mean about room full of people with the things I wanted (and had a plan for until my fianc! did the dirty 5 years ago). I sometimes come off Facebook because of the endless "my life is wonderful" posts (although I'm well aware there's a lot of window dressing too)

What's the 9 week stop date? Is it a particular point?

Internet dating is rubbish I agree. I live on a rock and there are just no decent single men here.

Let's try and get through this together. I'm trying to lose weight too. X

lulabelle

So I didn't run - arghhhhh!!! Annoyed but had a bit of a mad day with working flat out this morning then a lunch with a potential new client so intense 2 hours of conversation. Also had duck and potatoes (arghhhhh)

Then a "bitty" afternoon of not achieving much before back to office meaning to do some more work then run but got chatting to senior partner and before I knew it it was 7pm and I just wanted to come home

Just had a protein shake tonight to make up for fact had a fat boy lunch and plan on putting nice clean bedding on so should sleep more soundly. Up at 540 for training at 615 then a long hard day tomoz as need to be in office at 8 to clear things before heading off to where we are working out of office for next few weeks. It's really relentless!!!

Buffythedebtslayer

hello,


the 9 weeks runs from today till the 19th of March I think. I am in my very late 30s! I too had a guy who I believed I would be with, Lots happened he was good in parts but not remotely committed - it took almost ten years! I was committed and made a lot of mistakes, hence in debt, skint generally! and sharing a house with my lovely Mum. Hey ho you live and learn. Mum is in Florida for the winter so I can have abit more focus on me, hence the plan


Hope tomorrow is a good day Xx

lulabelle

Keep strong bufster, there is someone out there. I've made a deal with myself if I get to 39 and still single I'm getting a donor.

So this morning I worked out. Again was tough to get self out if bed but did it! I do feel so good having been up 2 hours already and got a workout out the way. Had a protein shake for brekkie then need to get into work in next half hour to clear the decks before heading out to where we are working for the day

I must must must get up and do a run tomorrow or I'll never do this 10k/half marathon!

RainbowBridgeReturns

Well done for sticking to your new year plans, it is very encouraging to see you still going strong.


You can do this xx.

JustAboutThere

lulabelle wrote: »

Going to try to rein in the spending next week. Have a friends surprise baby shower next sat but rather than a spendy afternoon tea out or some extravagant gift my friends have thankfully decided that everyone should just bring something for the tea (which is being held at a friends house) and a practical gift to make up a basket of baby wipes, nappies, things like that which they will find useful in the early weeks so at least that's fairly cheap!

Just catching up with your diary.

My usual gift to anyone expecting a baby is a multipack of babygro's and a rubber ducky!

lulabelle wrote: »

Oh and someone who I thought was a close friend really upset me Friday night saying she thinks I'm a lesbian (want to make it clear I have no issues with lesbians or gays I'm just saying I'm not)

I believe these comments say more about the person saying them than you. Its like they can't comprehend a person can be on their own. I've had one of my own sisters make the same comment to our mother - purely because I wouldn't answer the question "how's your love life?". If I dared ask her, she'd hit me over the head and tell me to "mind your own business". Double standards or what?!

So, a few random thoughts:

1. This person doesn't deserve your time as a 'friend'. She's toxic and don't waste any further effort on her.

2. There is a difference between 'alone' and 'lonely'. For the most part I'm 'alone' - but, occasionally I have been 'lonely'. But I'm secure in the knowledge that I'd rather be on my own than in a relationship for the sake of being in one.

3. I'd like to lose a little weight - but I enjoy food and if I eat a little less and exercise a little more, it will happen. In the meantime - "I have a women's figure, not a child's".

4. Being a little selfish and looking after yourself is not a bad thing. Investing in a personal trainer will help in the long run.

Take care of yourself.

lulabelle

Thanks guys for your kind and motivational words

Today has been another relentless day work wise and going to be under a lot of pressure/need to put some long hours in over the next few months

Been good on the diet today though so pleased with that and watching Bletchley circle from the other night whilst trying to figure out my new watch so I force self to run with no excuses tomorrow morning!