Please help settle a difference of opinion

Dunroamin

Kayalana99 wrote: »

Its so hard to answer this question without knowing the son ... I mean if he isn't capable of seeing sense to pay his TV licence then you'd pay it...so by coming on here and asking if you should pay it, it gives me the impression that although he has his problems he could see sense if something was to push him to it?

I know these are some strong assumptions I guess my suggestion would be with this in mind to take his TV off him and say he can't have it unless he pays his TV license ...because thats how it works..perhaps you could even have a word with the local police department and explain whats going on and they could 'visit' and say they will be coming back to confiscate it if he doesn't pay? I suppose that might be illegal even to threaten?! lol ideas I guess.

I'm a strong believer in making people stand on their own two feet...but obviously certain situations you need to see the bigger picture..

He's an adult who's mentally ill, not a child or an adult with learning difficulties!

Dunroamin

itsanne wrote: »

There are things I'm itching to say but can't! Aargh!

Go on - everybody else does!:)

con1888

WHY doesn't he want to pay it ? As you said even if he was well he wouldn't pay it... that second bit of info would mean I wouldn't be paying it for him.

duchy

Kayalana99 wrote: »

Its so hard to answer this question without knowing the son ... I mean if he isn't capable of seeing sense to pay his TV licence then you'd pay it...so by coming on here and asking if you should pay it, it gives me the impression that although he has his problems he could see sense if something was to push him to it?

I know these are some strong assumptions I guess my suggestion would be with this in mind to take his TV off him and say he can't have it unless he pays his TV license ...because thats how it works..perhaps you could even have a word with the local police department and explain whats going on and they could 'visit' and say they will be coming back to confiscate it if he doesn't pay? I suppose that might be illegal even to threaten?! lol ideas I guess.

I'm a strong believer in making people stand on their own two feet...but obviously certain situations you need to see the bigger picture..

Not sure why you are LOLing at the thought of treating a vunerable person illegally by going to their home (obviously doesn't live at home or would be covered by parent's licence) and stealing their property. That you have any expectation that the Police would act in the illegal manner you've suggested just shows you are completely off on another planet !!!

Stopping here before I say what I REALLY think -You're unbelievable !!!!

iammumtoone

If he doesn't want to pay for a licence, does he realise you can actually legally watch TV without doing so. You only need a licence to watch live TV, if you view everything on catch up you don't need a licence, could this be an option for him?

Do you know the reason he doesn't want to pay for one, it might be that he doesn't watch live TV.

zzzLazyDaisy

Thanks to the poster above. I was just about to make the same comment.

Are you SURE he is liable to pay a TV licence?

My own brother has mental health issues and worked out how to avoid paying a TV licence by not watching live TV but watching catch up via his PC on his TV. He has gone head to head with the TV licencing over this several times but seems to enjoy the challenge (he is very obstructional, for want of a better word).

Anyway, he would be FURIOUS if I went behind his back and paid it.

I think I would refuse to pay, let him get on with it, but be ready to stand by him and help out if he does end up fined or whatever. That might sound like a more expensive option but it is not because if you bail him out this year, it will happen again and again, and he will never learn to take responsibility for himself.

Sorry if this is not what you want to hear.

EDIT - as for going into his home and taking his TV - I am speechless!

claire16c

It would very much depend on why he wasn't paying that particular bill.

If he's fine paying say his council tax, or water & just being stubborn then no I wouldn't pay it. As he clearly knows he needs to pay bills. Why would he do the same if he was well? If it's just some protest about the bbc or something I'd let him face the music.

But if he's incapable of handling his financial affairs completely then yes I might pay it.

itsanne

For those asking why he won't pay, please bear in mind that son's way of thinking is somewhat different to the rest of us at the best of times. There is no proper reason why he does not want to pay for a licence. He comes out with "I'd rather give the money to xyz charity," or just says he's not doing it. He doesn't believe there could be any real consequence - he knows about the fine but just says he wouldn't pay that either :mad:. He "plans" to move abroad before it would come to that. Sigh . . .

Up until recently he could have watched tv on his laptop as we arranged internet access for him. He would not have been able to take on a contract himself. We had to cancel it and do not intend to redo it. (This is where it's so frustrating to be able to give only a very limited picture of the situation!) So the watching only "not live" tv is not an option.

BitterAndTwisted

He's just out of hospital against medical advice: therefore I doubt that he's competent to make the decision to not pay for his license. Doesn't make any difference (to me) that he probably wouldn't pay it himself if he was well.

If he's caught without a license those Centrica folks are determined to badger, threaten and bamboozle even those who are mentally fit to engage with them.

I wouldn't risk it.

Kayalana99

Dunroamin wrote: »

He's an adult who's mentally ill, not a child or an adult with learning difficulties!

I think any parent would just pay it as its their child regardless of age if they were not able/not in right state of mind to do so...but OP must seem to think he would be likey to pay it himself if the right circumstances arose hence the post of ideas to give him a push...either way I was just trying to be helpful as I said above no one knows the whole situation so I am clutching at straws...yes.

I think the police was abit to far hence the 'lol' but saying I am unbeliveable for giving suggestions....