Parents want to do a "House Swap".

AlexLK

Person_one wrote: »

Yeah, but it is though, isn't it? Morally, if not legally.

In my opinion it is not morally "cheating" at all, in fact I'm all for any legal loopholes to avoid paying tax and anybody who says they aren't is most likely lying.

lostinrates wrote: »

How does one define scrounger?

As well as the other points you suggest are philosophical musing Alex, perhaps this bears some consideration?

Very much so.

AlexLK

Hermia wrote: »

I am concerned about that too. I remember telling my parents that I did not want the heirlooms they had saved for me (all enormous things that would have cost me a fortune to store) and it was a shock to them. Whilst inheriting is lovely being told that your family wants you to live in the house and then leave it to your child would be a burden I could do without. Bearing in mind he might also feel the burden of the grandparents paying for the education. My friend works in a private school and says some of the kids feel this enormous family burden on them when everyone has gone to the same school, but it's not actually right for them. Are your parents accepting of the fact that you may need to sell the house one day or that your son won't want it or will follow his own path? If the answer is not yes proceed with caution.

My parents would not want me to sell the house, nor would I want to. As for my son (their grandson), they have most likely not gave an awful lot of thought into those issues.

Person_one

AlexLK wrote: »

In my opinion it is not morally "cheating" at all, in fact I'm all for any legal loopholes to avoid paying tax and anybody who says they aren't is most likely lying.

Be careful about judging other people by your own standards.

I'm struggling to see the point of this thread now. Clearly the only opinions that matter to you are your own and your parents'.

I wish your wife the best of luck.

barbarawright

Do your parents really want to do this house swap? On your other thread you say

AlexLK wrote: »

Thank you.



I suppose in many ways I, like my father, wish I was something other than a "mere pleb". I try to "make up for" my shortcomings by "playing a part".

If truth be told, I want to do the house swap more than my parents who like the idea of the house being passed down but don't really want to let me have it as much as I want it. I am their only son and shouldn't have to be pushed aside in favour of their grandson.

AlexLK

Person_one wrote: »

Be careful about judging other people by your own standards.

I'm struggling to see the point of this thread now. Clearly the only opinions that matter to you are your own and your parents'.

I wish your wife the best of luck.

There's nothing wrong with my moral standards, thank you very much. I, too, have a sneaking suspicion this thread is not going my way, either.

My wife does not need luck, thank you.

barbarawright wrote: »

Do your parents really want to do this house swap? On your other thread you say

Admitted, I want the house more than they wish to do the swap. However, they want to avoid tax and the swap (to me) seems a good idea.

mountainofdebt

AlexLK wrote: »

Thank you for all your input. I don't think it is relOswald Bailey Outdoor Expertsevant to bring up what my mother calls my wife's family. Frankly, there is "history" between the two set of parents.

So far as affordability goes: parents wouldn't be bothered about paying moving costs and would help with upkeep of the house as ultimately they wish it to be passed to my son and to his future first child. If I could sort my (and wife's) spending out then I think it is doable, although we would have to cut back and wife would certainly not like that. Admittedly, if anything happened between my wife and I, at least until I'd "got back on my feet", my parents would end up paying the essential bills for the house . They know I don't earn very much money.

Mrs. K. frankly doesn't have the first clue as to the benefits of this swap and sees our house as "really nice". I'm not still tied to my parents and am sorting my finances out myself.

Alex - I said before you were happy to sell your soul and you asked me what I mean by that.

The above post confirms it for me - YOU want to do this house swop YOU want your son to have private education and if mammy and daddy are willing to pay for it then whats wrong in allowing the apron strings to be firmly attached.....and in the meantime the woman you married has no say in the matter at all.

Perhaps wife is fully aware that the swop will mean mummy and daddy have control over YOUR family unit.

The way I see it is that your parents should keep hold of their existing house as when your wife decides she's had enough of being married to someone who is only playing at being a grown up, they'll need to have the extra rooms to accommodate you, and on weekends your son

Hermia

AlexLK wrote: »

My parents would not want me to sell the house, nor would I want to. As for my son (their grandson), they have most likely not gave an awful lot of thought into those issues.

But what if you change your mind about wanting to sell the house? You may not want to now, but things could change in 10/20/30 years. I know that the place I want to live now is very different to the sort of place I wanted to live 20 years ago. That is not unusual. Have you really thought about how you will deal with that situation. I cannot think of anything worse than being stuck somewhere I had grown tired of forever.

Your parents do need to think about their attitude to your son. You don't want him to be made to feel guilty when he is older because he doesn't want the ties of property or wants to run off to another life.

AlexLK

mountainofdebt wrote: »

.....
The way I see it is that your parents should keep hold of their existing house as when your wife decides she's had enough of being married to someone who is only playing at being a grown up, they'll need to have the extra rooms to accommodate you, and on weekends your son

That's not really funny.

Hermia wrote: »

But what if you change your mind about wanting to sell the house? You may not want to now, but things could change in 10/20/30 years. I know that the place I want to live now is very different to the sort of place I wanted to live 20 years ago. That is not unusual. Have you really thought about how you will deal with that situation. I cannot think of anything worse than being stuck somewhere I had grown tired of forever.

Your parents do need to think about their attitude to your son. You don't want him to be made to feel guilty when he is older because he doesn't want the ties of property or wants to run off to another life.

Thank you, give me something to think about.

mountainofdebt

AlexLK wrote: »

That's not really funny.
.

Who said I was try to be ?

AlexLK

mountainofdebt: I'm not some stupid little boy who needs mummy and daddy to sort everything out for me, thank you very much. Therefore, I presumed you were trying to make somewhat of a sick joke.