Parents want to do a "House Swap".

HPoirot

Wow. The house is only worth £1m, not some ancient pile bequeathed to your ancestors by William the Conqueror, why should "scroungers" be kept away from it?

I am honestly very shocked at how uncultured the OP is to speak in those terms.

AlexLK

HPoirot: Please be kind enough to let me be, thank you.

lostinrates

HPoirot wrote: »

Wow. The house is only worth £1m, not some ancient pile bequeathed to your ancestors by William the Conqueror, why should "scroungers" be kept away from it?

I am honestly very shocked at how uncultured the OP is to speak in those terms.

A million buys different things in different parts of the country. What I'd say is that we live in a comparatively highly valued but not grand wreck, and even though to our choice I some times feel tied and restricted here.

Choice is so much less with 'property'. My parents and grandparents generation were ones who stopped feeling such guilt about selling up. IMO, breath of fresh air. They also replaced antique furniture with new classics.....

peachyprice

AlexLK wrote: »

mountainofdebt: I'm not some stupid little boy who needs mummy and daddy to sort everything out for me, thank you very much. Therefore, I presumed you were trying to make somewhat of a sick joke.

Sorry, but that is exactly the impression you are giving.

You want mummy and daddy to give you a big house
You want mummy and daddy to educate your son
You're more loyal to mummy and daddy than your wife
House swapping with mummy and daddy will help you pay your debt off
Mummy and daddy have already bailed you one once before because you're so hapless
You're crapping on your wife because mummy and daddy think you married beneath yourself (is that even possible for nouveaux?)

mountainofdebt

AlexLK wrote: »

mountainofdebt: I'm not some stupid little boy who needs mummy and daddy to sort everything out for me, thank you very much. Therefore, I presumed you were trying to make somewhat of a sick joke.

No Alex .....call me the ghost of christmas future unless you start acting like a grown up and starts taking serious notice of what your wife wants rather than what mummy and daddy wants him and his family to do

HPoirot

lostinrates wrote: »

A million buys different things in different parts of the country. What I'd say is that we live in a comparatively highly valued but not grand wreck, and even though to our choice I some times feel tied and restricted here.

Choice is so much less with 'property'. My parents and grandparents generation were ones who stopped feeling such guilt about selling up. IMO, breath of fresh air. They also replaced antique furniture with new classics.....

I am not unfamiliar with the passing down through generations and how choices are curtailed although my parents and the pile in question are not in the UK.

The value here is not so material as the attitude of the protagonist.

AlexLK

lostinrates wrote: »

A million buys different things in different parts of the country. What I'd say is that we live in a comparatively highly valued but not grand wreck, and even though to our choice I some times feel tied and restricted here.

Choice is so much less with 'property'. My parents and grandparents generation were ones who stopped feeling such guilt about selling up. IMO, breath of fresh air. They also replaced antique furniture with new classics.....

Thank you for your balanced posts.

peachyprice wrote: »

Sorry, but that is exactly the impression you are giving.

You want mummy and daddy to give you a big house
You want mummy and daddy to educate your son
You're more loyal to mummy and daddy than your wife
House swapping with mummy and daddy will help you pay your debt off
Mummy and daddy have already bailed you one once before because you're so hapless
You're crapping on your wife because mummy and daddy think you married beneath yourself (is that even possible for nouveaux?)

Erm, no.

- I want to inherit without losing the house due to tax.
- Parents have offered and I'm currently in a rather awkward financial position at the moment.
- Not at all.
- Again, not at all, this has nothing to do with my debt.
- I'm not hapless and I was ill when my parents bailed me out before.
- OK, they think I married beneath myself. If you must know they wished me to "marry up" when I was younger. I didn't.

mountainofdebt wrote: »

No Alex .....call me the ghost of christmas future unless you start acting like a grown up and starts taking serious notice of what your wife wants rather than what mummy and daddy wants him and his family to do

Why has this got to be all about my wife? Frankly, I don't see her opinion any more valid than my own.

Tryingagainandagain

But you are constantly denying the validity of her opinions as you have professed them in your posts.

lostinrates

HPoirot wrote: »

I am not unfamiliar with the passing down through generations and how choices are curtailed although my parents and the pile in question are not in the UK.

The value here is not so material as the attitude of the protagonist.

My 'not posh'side was uk. While not 'posh' there was a small estate built up over many years, farms, and a very small 'house' more a smart farm house than anything, and, quaintly, a couple of Other community buildings, and some literary stuff. As the daught of a son of second son, of second son, of a second son none would have been ' 'ours' and its mainly all under or swamped by an industrial development now. The literary stuff is almost out of copywriter, but it has been nice to give an appreciation photocopies copies of original stuff (i only have photocopies) so they can enjoy that.

The money...was never mine. The property, was never mine. The other side was all abroad and some years ago it turned out something should have been given that wasn't. After a long talk with my DH about the animosity this would create and the cost of perusing this, and the emotional problems, we let it go. DH also suffered inheritance problems and chose family unity over ' rights'. His situation was different and not sure I would have done the same in his shoes, but I share his reasoning for not.

Tbh, nothing is worth what we have achieved together. Could we have had more, well, probably. But it would not be so sweet.

Alex, the blessing I would feel we had were we able to have health, a child would be tremendous. Rejoice in these things you have.

Person_one

lostinrates wrote: »

Alex, the blessing I would feel we had were we able to have health, a child would be tremendous. Rejoice in these things you have.

Thanks X a million, very well said.