12-24 weeks pregnant (part2)

mysecretalias

Vickyvics I am very much in agreement with you, as long as things are uncomplicated and straightforward with the birth meaning I'm not in for a few days, it will only be OH and I there for the duration. We haven't told anyone else this yet but we hope they would respect our wishes - if not it's tough really! This will be our time to bond with our baby and I'm not sacrificing that just to stop people having tantrums.

RobotsinDisguse

marywooyeah wrote: »

Robots I'm sorry to hear you feel this way, I know you're having a very tough time right now but please dont let this put a dampner on your pregnancy, people will happy for you that you're having a baby and even if there is a very small chance of downs it doesnt make your child any less of a person or any less worth celebrating their little life. You hold your bump with pride and love and you will both be fine whatever happens. Sending you big love and reassurance and remember, youre not "goimg to be" a mummy, you already are one, and a darn good one already from what everyone here can see keep your head up chick xxx

Thank you Mary. This made me cry. In a good way.

Husband hasn't wanted to touch my belly since the midwife came last Saturday. He wasn't all over it before but would 'say hi' first and last thing at least. I asked him 2 days ago why he hasn't, but he had nothing to say. I guess it's added to me feeling insecure. But you are right. I'll remember what you've said xxx


Ok, posativity re-starts here!
Im going for a bath. I can feel the uterus easily in water. Yesterday I had some weird pelvis pain and could see the uterus / feel it rising above my bones last night. Does that make sense? If it weren't for my collapsed stomach muscles I think I'd be showing a bit now! :rotfl::j

fireyfirenze

I'll be allowing parents I'm really close to my mum and dad and no doubt I'll be feeling rough but I can't wait to introduce their grandchild, it's their first my mum works in the hospital so if shes at work at the time she can duck out and visit

my OH mum can come too if she wants but she works a lot and lives 35 monutes away so I don't know if she'll make it.

marywooyeah

No worries robots, its supposed to be a happy time and its difficult to come to terms with when you feel sad/anxious/upset instead, even more so if youre feeling alone too. I'm sorry to hear that your partner is being a bit distant, perhaps he is trying to take things in in his own but inadvertently being distant in doing so resulting in you feeling that hes not interested?

Could you write him a little note or something telling him how this is making you feel? Or just grab his hand and put it on your tummy?

And re your belly, it shows differently on different people and at different times so its perfectly possible that you can see it now. Which reminds me I love your pic Mrs Tm! Puts a whole new spin on the selfie! Xxx

neverdespairgirl

VickyVics wrote: »

In regards to telling people we told immediate family as soon as we found out at 4 weeks. My feelings were that if anything dad happen I would have wanted them to be there for me and be aware of what was going on. We then told everyone else as soon as we had the 12 week scan. It was getting quite hard not to tell people at that point though because I was showing and a lot of people were beginning to guess!!

I was wondering what everyone's plans were in regards to visits from parents in the hospital. We have been thinking about this and have found we are a little bit torn.even if you are only there for say one night? This is my first baby and I am not even sure how long is normal for a hospital stay. xx

I think it depends - usually just overnight, if a normal delivery. I had an emergency c-section with Isaac, and it was a minimum of 3 days. That's a vast improvement on how they did it in 1978 - when I was born, after an emergency c-section, they imprisoned my mother for 13 days afterwards! That would have driven me completely up the wall.

As for parents, my parents-in-law both died when I was pregnant, so it was only mine who were in the picture. My mother was there quite a lot of the time I was in labour, alternating with OH and one of my best friends. She shared a flat with me and OH for 8 years, and was a doctor who trained at UCH where Isaac was born, so they weren't going to start chucking her out even though she wasn't a relative (-:

My mother would have been there when Isaac was born, except for the emergency c-section bit, as only one person was allowed in the theatre with me. She and my mate both came into the recovery room, so they saw Isaac when he was only a few minutes old. That was midnight, so my Dad, sisters and brother came to see us both the next day. Other relatives (my uncles and so forth) didn't come to the hospital, but came to see us at home a few days later.

My Mama stayed for about a fortnight after he was born, and that was great - OH and I were still at the stage of handling Isaac as if he were an unexploded bomb which might go off at any minute, and it was really helpful to have my mother there. She mostly did things like cooking meals, putting washing on, and just being around and reassuring and helpful, and it was really nice.

neverdespairgirl

cllola wrote: »

Hi all and happy new year! We are all having babies this year!!

Mrs tm that's a very tidy bump for 16 weeks, I'm very jealous, I still just look podgy unless I'm wearing anything 'over the bump' to smooth it out a bit.

On the subject of finding out the sex, I'm desperate to know because I'm just too impatient! DH and I have 3 boys between us from previous relationships. I have DS 4/5 days out of the week and we have DH's twin boys every weekend so there is usually a house full of boys most of the time! It would be lovely to join the flurry of girls but we will be happy with either. A boy would definitely be cheaper as we have 5 years worth of boy stuff!

We are having a lazy day today, DH went out to a friends house last night and I stayed in to look after the boys, he came home at 8:30 this morning having not slept but drank an awful lot so I'm reluctantly playing nurse!

Are your 3 combined sons roughly the same age? Do they get on well together?

I don't look that much different, really. At nearly 21 weeks, I feel I ought to be all out there with the bump, but I just look like I scoffed far too many mince pies over the Christmas holiday! Which is particularly annoying as I ate very little compared with everyone else, as I still feel queasy a lot of the time.

You are very patient, I'd not have had an ounce of patience with OH doing that lol. I think he is entirely knackered from New Year's Eve, as he's giving Isaac a bath, and then going to bed himself once Isaac's tucked up.

neverdespairgirl

sophiasmum wrote: »

Hi Vickyviks - with DD1 I was induced and had her 3AM and DH sent home (in a proper hospital). Was allowed visitors the next evening and I couldn't wait to show her off tbh and see my mum and dad! MIL visited as well...- went home the next day.

Isaac was born just before midnight, and OH got chucked out pretty soon afterwards, which annoyed him. He said the attitude was, "congratulations, you're a father - now f*** off." Which was pretty accurate, really!

marywooyeah wrote: »

Sending you big love and reassurance and remember, youre not "goimg to be" a mummy, you already are one, and a darn good one already from what everyone here can see keep your head up chick xxx

Mary's absolutely right there, robot - you are a Mummy already. And a great one.

I know it's really easy to say when you aren't in the position yourself, but the odds are still really substantially in your favour <hugs>

RobotsinDisguse

What you said mary really did help, I had a relaxing bath, held my belly and talked to bean a little. I am it's mummy, I'm its food a shelter and all it knows of the world
I then got out of the bath, put on bra & leggings and took a selfie! :rotfl: (both standing naturally and pulling my stomach up - and there's certainly a bump!:D) thanks mrsT for the inspiration! And your photo is FAB
then I called a close friend who is a nurse and told her everything. (I hadn't been able to speak to her in the narrow time I was feeling elated). And I feel so much better.

neverdespairgirl - wow you have such an amazing relationship with your mum! It's nice to know that's real and possible and just not in the movies

mrshappy

Robots-glad you are feeling a bit better, you have had so much to take in over the last few days you must be emotionally exhausted. I think men go in to some form of shut down when it gets a bit too much emotionally for them.

I'm hoping for a fairly quick discharge from hospital all being well, even if I am in overnight wild horses couldn't keep my parents from visiting! When I had my son my parents lived in the next street to the hospital and I couldn't wait to show off this wee miracle I had produced-I wanted to shout it from the rooftops

cllola

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

Are your 3 combined sons roughly the same age? Do they get on well together?

I don't look that much different, really. At nearly 21 weeks, I feel I ought to be all out there with the bump, but I just look like I scoffed far too many mince pies over the Christmas holiday! Which is particularly annoying as I ate very little compared with everyone else, as I still feel queasy a lot of the time.

You are very patient, I'd not have had an ounce of patience with OH doing that lol. I think he is entirely knackered from New Year's Eve, as he's giving Isaac a bath, and then going to bed himself once Isaac's tucked up.

They are 2 years apart Ds is 5 and the twins are 3. At this age there seems to be quite a large age gap because my son gets frustrated that the twins can't 'talk' to him like he can but they get by! I think in a couple of years they will be a lot closer.

Lol well I don't let him forget it so he will make it up to me :-P