Culture of getting engaged young/ quick

Gloomendoom

Morglin

EmmaBridgewater wrote: »

I'm interested in older people's (sorry!!) opinions..

It seems every day someone from my school year (21) is getting engaged. We are in about 10% engaged and a further 10% with children, some more than one. Two marriages (and one soon to be divorce...)

I'm wondering whether it was like this for people my parents age too? Obviously you didn't find out about it on Facebook! My parents, and friends parents all met in their mid twenties and got married mid-late, I'm sure there were people who got engaged younger but were there as many as now?

Years ago, in the 60's/70's, you were expected, as a female, to find a nice boy, get wed and look after him and the babies lol:eek:

I got engaged at 17, married at 18 and divorced at 48 - so dunno if that was a success or not lol

Lin

Alias_Omega

Mrs AO became preggy after the old... "i cant have babies - ovary cists?"...

Marriage followed before baby was born. Baby nearly 7

System

I'm 52 and in my final year of school there were three people in my class who were pregnant. As far as I remember, none of the girls got engaged/married. They just became 'unmarried Mums'.

I got engaged at 16 and married at 17 but I wasn't pregnant and the marriage only lasted 5 years. I was the only one in my year wearing an engagement ring though.:o

Floss

Similar to Judi, I'm 50 and met my ex-h when I was 17 3/4, was engaged before the end of my A-levels, married on my 20th birthday, had DS1 at 22 & DS2 at 24, separated after 15 years and divorced 2 years later.

I don't recall any unmarried mums at school, but there was a unit in our town that they attended.

Worry_Wart

I moved in with my first proper boyfriend, when we were both 17 as things in my own house weren't great. We agreed if the relationship lasted until we were 27 we would get married then!! He lived in a big dilapidated house in Clapham and his batty but lovely hippy mother lived in the basement (she had ME and was only awake at night, watching old black and white films, and almost never left the basement), so we had the rest of the crumbling house to ourselves. We both went off to uni at Manchester, but drifted apart naturally after a couple of years.

It took me another 16 years before I moved in with someone again. Despite being young it was a fairly serious relationship.

pollypenny

Almost all of my friends did the college/ uni then got married soon after thing. Kids a few years later. No fancy holidays, saved like mad for a deposit.

We are mid-sixties to seventies. No living together without the ring, then.

ladymarmalade

I am 26 so not to disimilar to your age. I personally think alot of people my age and younger do rush into things a little bit and pay the price later on. I have been involved in the planning of countless of my friends' weddings that never actually happened because they couple split up. Having said that, of course there are some people who meet and marry very quickly and have very successful relationships. Or people who take their time and still end up getting divorced or splitting up. So I guess there is no 'right' way of doing it.

As with one of the above posters, my husband told me he would marry me within the first month of dating, however, we decided to wait 8 years, and finaly married last year.

For us it was a perfect time ... I was 18 when we got together, the 8 years allowed me to get my degree and masters, qualify in my job, live in two other countries and generally get some life experience. It also meant at the point of getting married, we both had professional jobs and so could have the kind of wedding we wanted, without getting into debt which was important to us. I am glad we waited...I know he is the one for me

themull1

Im nearly 46, i got married at 22, then at 39, then at 45!! I got married at 22 because i thought i would be left on the shelf...too quickly, only knew him 7 months, second husband knew 12 years, got married, went downhill fast after that. Third and final (hopefully) husband, man of my dreams....

Indie_Kid

My parents got married when mum was 23 and dad was 26. Their eldest child (my brother) was born 4 months later.

27 years later, they're still happily married.