do i invite my brother or not?

tea_lover

I think you've worded that email really well. I hope they reply, and that they come to the meal.

stormbreaker

You can do no more. Lets hope your friend at work is right!

Funky_Bold_Ribena

bylromarha wrote: »

Same thing happened to me - except OHs sister was 21.

I politely and firmly told MIL no. I didn't want her, OH didn't want her.

Families can make weddings such a pain!

Yeah but this little girl was 3! Not 21.

Crikey - there are some real B'Zillas on here these days.

bylromarha

loopyloouk wrote: »

thank you for all your replies,

thought i had better update the situation, i sent an invite to them both by email as i would not have had time by post due to the table numbers, i attached some new pics of my daughter and included the following:-

'i hope you are both ok? it has been ages since we all had a chance to catch up, ''''''' is doing fantastic and getting so big she would love to see you both as would i. I would like to apologies if you feel that i overstepped the mark in the run up to your wedding day in relation to the comment made, i did feel incredibly hurt that you would say that you did not want '''''' to be bridesmaid in front of her. I hope we can put this behind us and try to move forward. ''''' you are my brother and i miss you and SIL i would like a chance to build some bridges with you and become friends again.

i haven't as of yet received a response but i have asked for an answer by tomorrow to confirm numbers at the restaurant. I am hopefull but i really don't think she will come. My friend at work but a different spin on it and thought perhaps my SIL may be embarrassed by saying that in front of my daughter and her family, my mom, auntie etc. To be honest i hadn't even thought of that so we shall see.

i am sorry i said she was controlling but i was so hurt that she would say that in front of my daughter, my LO was so excited in trying her dress on and parading up and down in the bridal shop her little face was a picture and then to have that said to us was a big shock to the system. I don't regret attending the wedding and my daughter bring bridesmaid it was awkward but i would have regretted not going as i do love my brother.

Saying sorry is hard, especially after so long. :T

Let us know if they come or not - either way have a great celebration.

MrsRogers

I think your wording was fab and demonstrates you are the bigger person. If they don't. One their loss.

Okydoky25

I felt obliged to have my husbands niece as a bridesmaid at our wedding but I would never have taken this out on my sister in law or my husband tbh. I think it would have been very selfish of me and tried to look at it for what it was. A family occasion.

I'm slightly peeved now she is getting married but has not asked my kids but that's another issue!

I would invite them. Be the bigger person x

sexyjacksparrow

Sounds like a good email. I do hope that they will come and you are able to build bridges with her but, even if they don't, you have done the right thing and done all you reasonably can. The ball is well and truly in their court now!

bagpussbear

I like that email OP, think you've done the right thing. Balls in their court now, and I hope they come and you are all able to go forward. Good luck.

Takeaway_Addict

Funky_Bold_Ribena wrote: »

Yeah but this little girl was 3! Not 21.

Crikey - there are some real B'Zillas on here these days.

I don't get the issue with age? If someone doesn't want children in special roles then surely that is their prerogative?

Person_one

Takeaway_Addict wrote: »

I don't get the issue with age? If someone doesn't want children in special roles then surely that is their prerogative?

The groom wanted her, and the age means she wasn't as big an imposition or cost as an adult.