Smoking guest - WWYD?

sulkisu

A situation arose today that I have never encountered before, and I just wondered what others would do in this position.

OH and I were invited to a lunch party at a colleagues house. There were probably about 35 people there and it was a buffet type do, with guests milling around inside and in the garden (until the rain started and we all ended up inside).

One guest, a relative of the hosts I think, lit up a cigarette and started smoking in the house. The husband went over and asked him to go out onto the porch as they did not allow smoking in the house. The guests response was a firm 'no'. He said something along the lines of 'I have been smoking x a day for y years, you knew I was a smoker when you invited me and if you didn't want me smoking in your house, you shouldn't have invited me or you should have told me in advance that smoking was banned - I might have stayed at home'. The wife then said 'that's not very polite', and he replied ' expecting guests to stand outside is not very polite either'. He calmly finished his cigarette. We all just stood there open mouthed. He wasn't rude and he didn't raise his voice, he just refused to stop smoking or go outside. I think the couple were caught off guard and didn't know how to react.

It got me thinking. I don't allow smoking in the house and I don't necessarily warn people in advance - I'm not sure if anyone does - although I will after today.

My gut reaction in their shoes would have been to move him with my foot, but thinking about it on the way home, perhaps there was a kind of twisted logic in what he said .

I just wondered what others would do in their shoes.

Funky_Bold_Ribena

I'd say 'in that case, would you please leave our home. Thanks'

System

Guest or not, your house, your rules. I would have asked him to take his fag and get his coat!
I know loads of smokers and every one of them do not smoke or allow others to smoke inside the house.
Linda x

aileth

I would tell him to leave immediately as we shouldn't expect people to be so thick headed that we had to tell them smoking was not appropriate inside a family home, and that he wasn't welcome again.

Tiglath

I'd kick him out immediately - his behaviour is completely unacceptable, and I don't know any smokers who would do anything like that.

ziggy2004

If someone did that they would be asked to leave and not come back.

There are a variety of things which people do in their own homes which others may object to in their house.

I have a collection of smokers in my family and am an ex smoker myself and have no problem in asking people not to smoke in my house.

( kind of the opposite I choose not to visit houses in which someone is smoking with my children, I do not expect them to stop smoking just because I do not like smoke around my children but will make other arrangements to see them)

peachyprice

Arrogant pig.

pinkshoes

Arrogant *$#*

Clearly the guy knows nothing about manners and etiquette and will be excluded from all future events!

CH27

Arrogant oaf!
I would have told him to leave at once.

sulphate

Totally unacceptable. That guy obviously doesn't want any friends.

Melaniep101

Incredibly rude! As a smoker, I wouldn't dream of lighting up in someone's home. I'd even ask permission to smoke outside to be honest.

I would have asked him to leave if it was my home.