Starting out in life

paulineb_2

Heres a thread where someone planned a wedding for 3k, the final page shows it went over by about £500 but it might give the OP and anyone else looking to plan a wedding on a set budget, some ideas.

And she got her dress from ebay

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/3811691

Gloomendoom

onlyroz wrote: »

I would have thought you could have a great wedding for around £3k. Ways to cut costs are to have a buffet rather than a sit-down meal, and to only provide soft drinks (with a paid-bar for those who feel the need to hit the booze).

That's what we did. We further cut costs by inviting guests to bring along food for the buffet. There was mountains of it.

We did do a free bar though.

paulineb_2

EmmaBridgewater wrote: »

That. Is. What. I'm. Saying.

If they want to spend it, let them spend it! Some people spend 10s of 1000s, 6k is really not that much comparably.

The OP and his partner dont have it to spare, thats the difference, the whole tone of the opening post was, how are we going to achieve this.

Not everyone has the funds to pay for a wedding without breaking the bank. If this thread had been entitled, Im having a no expense spared wedding, some of the comments would have been entirely different.

FatVonD

We managed to do our wedding reasonably cheaply. My wedding dress was £70 from a vintage dress shop, DSD's 'bridesmaid' dress came from ebay.

We got married late afternoon on a Thursday which meant the registry office was cheaper and our evening venue was free provided we paid for their buffet which was 8.50 per head for 40 people and then that was topped up later in the evening when about 20 or so other guests arrived.

We supplied our own Proseco and paid the corkage charge, wedding cake was cupcakes from Waitrose which we ended up getting for free because they forgot to order them for the day before and had to deliver them on the morning.

We asked one of our guests to DJ for us as a wedding present.

Our biggest expense was putting money behind the bar for drinks (at pub prices though rather than hotel prices!) DH's workmates still say it was the best wedding they've ever been to :rotfl:

This was where our reception was, just because it's a pub doesn't mean it has to be spit and sawdust and sandwiches with curly crusts!

http://www.handandspear.co.uk/

System

Of course you can have the wedding you want and the house you dream of, that's if you don't mind waiting for years to save for it.

duchy

I do think that it is very easy to assume that you "must" do weddings a particular way......... Most of the weddings I've attended at hotels have all been pretty much the samre to be honest and kind of blurr together.

If your fiancee has very set ideas...or you do-fair enough-you are planning far enough ahead to make some savings-fixing the price of venue, photographer etc at this years prices, sourcing a dress at a good price etc (I was idly looking at ebay for wedding dress style ideas with no intention of buying-saw the perfect dress and put in a cheeky bid-and won- the perfect wedding dress in my eyes for £44. Had I not liked it when it arrived it would have gone straight back on ebay however.

If you want a more memorable wedding however -look at non hotel venues -look at hiring a venue and having your own outside caterers, decide if you want a church wedding or somewhere else- for example near me we have several historic sites ....one of our local registry offices is right off a cobbled high street with a castle and cathedral opposite -wonderful for photos.
If you go for a midweek wedding it can reduce the numbers -handy for avoiding WW3 -you've invited them and they've chosen to decline-not your fault and tends to weed out those only coming for the free meal who you have to invite cos they are family but wouldn't miss if they weren't there.

Choose a tiny church that will only hold very immediate family -so smaller sitdown meal and big party in the evening....

There are lots of choices over and above standard wedding venues despite what the magazines claim

My brother had a registry office followed by a bangers and mash party in a local pub that has awards for their sausages - took over the whole pub-everyone had a great time -personally I'd want something more formal than that ....but it suited them and they didn't feel any the less married for it.

I don't really drink so I personally don't feel the need for a free bar - wine on arrival, and with dinner plus something fizzy to toast -then a pay bar is more than acceptable.

Interesting venues for weddings ..... older civic buildings(some town halls have breathtaking function rooms and you can often use outside catering) older schools and colleges are often great buildings and available to hire out for weddings in vacation time.....riverside non hotel venues can be great - with lovely settings etc...think outside the box a bit and work out what your wedding essentials are and how much you are prepared to do yourself (like invitations for example) and start playing with a budget. Every couple has different "must haves" but sometimes you don't realise which they are til you start really talking about it and let go of the idea of what a wedding "should be" and think about what you really want !

Ultimately though if you want a home too -decide your priorities..... is an extra thousand better in the housebuying budget or the wedding budget. Sometimes looking at it that way helps you decide which is the greater priority. In your shoes I'd rather have a dress from ebay and the thousand I saved in the house pot .....and the free bar float would be better spent on adding to the home deposit...... but only you two can decide what your own priorities are and if renting a bit longer is worth it to spend more on a wedding or not.

DigForVictory

Matt! Congratulations on your engagement!
Welcome to your MSE family, happily bickering over what we think you should do. I do hope we make your mother in law seem manageable? (Now if you had to invite & feed all of us lot, you *definitely* would have problems with the budget...)

It's the whole Starting Out In Life idea that has all the hopes & fears out - everyone wants to think they've helped you off to the Best Start and the problem with that is that what the Best Start is varies with the people involved as well as the time of day, government in power & wind speed.

I'm not saying a word - it'll be a special day for you both no matter how much or how little you spend. May it be a happy day of many such, with all the faces you want to see around you & fair weather above you.

And then may the Kindly Ones show mercy. Househunting & buying is a tear-your-hair out job nine times out of eight, but we'll all be here to cheer you on...

picklekin

I had a great wedding for 2k including a night in a hotel for the two of us.

For me the marriage was worth more then one day, its JUST ONE DAY, you have your whole lives together. But, for some I guess its been a lifetime dream to have this magical dream and would feel slighted without it..

Toto

You lot can argue till the cows come home about what is reasonable to spend on a wedding. However, the OP and his future wife have clearly decided what they want to do and where they want the wedding. So suggesting they have a bbq in the garden or hire the room at the top of a pub is a bit pointless.

I think they should be applauded for saving up first, too many people just bung it all on credit and start their married life in a hole. There are things they can do to shave a few quid off though, I got my dress in a bridal shop, but, it happened to be a sample. Ok, so a few people might have tried it on but it cost me £275 rather than the £3500 price, it fit me perfectly so no need to alter but I did have it dry cleaned.

If you can plan your wedding a bit out of season you will find better discounts can be had, you might even be able to haggle a fair bit with the venue.

poet123

picklekin wrote: »

I had a great wedding for 2k including a night in a hotel for the two of us.

For me the marriage was worth more then one day, its JUST ONE DAY, you have your whole lives together. But, for some I guess its been a lifetime dream to have this magical dream and would feel slighted without it.. For me..

You can have an expensive wedding and still be of that view though.:D