Does it make parents look better' if their child goes to university?

carebabe

the only person ''failing'' is the neighbour in her role as a mother by the way she is acting.

olibrofiz

In answer to the OP, I guess the parents think it makes them look better, but it's a 'pride' that's a bit archaic IMO. These days the % of people who take it as a given right they should go to Uni is too high, and some of them really shouldn't be there! Saying that tho, the amount of jobs where a degree is required - even if it has no bearing on the job - is silly. Someone that has the experience is overlooked for someone that doesn't, but has a degree (admin role - Zoology degree ???)

There are more things to be proud of your children for.

And I think that the woman telling all and sundry that her child has 'failed' is so sad. Poor kid!!

midnightraven3

i agree with carebabe
this isnt a "parent" thing, its a specific to your neighbour thing. she boasted about her daughter going to uni, daughter failed and is now claiming benefits. So she does look a fool, but its her own doing
all 3 of ours are at uni, and yes i am incredibly proud of them for it, i am proud of WHO they are, as much of what they do

Person_one

maman wrote: »

Is it just me that thinks who talk about 'uni' shouldn't be allowed to go there!;)

I expect so.

pukkamum

Funky_Bold_Ribena wrote: »

Incorrect. I trained in a trade [civil engineering] and was on £14k. I scrimped and saved and worked all the hours I could to send myself to uni, got a mickey mouse degree [yes, combined honours and it included media] and was earning £50k within 2 years of getting my degree. I was already on £35k by the time I graduated.

Just getting a degree [ears or no ears] shows your abilities and puts you further up the earnings ladder by giving you an actual ladder. Which just having a trade doesn't do by any stretch of the imagination.

But you clearly had a goal in mind and the determination to suceed, by mickey mouse degree I am referring to the easier degrees taken purely because someone wants the uni experience of drinking, socialising etc or they think it is a way into a guaranteed high earning position.
I know many people who went to uni, racked up a mountain of debt, ruined their livers, only to be doing a job they could have got straight from college and be much further up the ladder.

Poppy9

Soleil_lune wrote: »

Interesting responses thank you!

Oh yes indeed my neighbour has been blathering to everyone in the street about how her daughter has 'failed' and now has to sign on the dole, and she made it clear that she has brought embarrassment to her. When I was younger, very few people went to uni, so this is all new to me, but this woman says that she doesn't know how she is going to tell people (peers/family,) that her daughter has 'failed.'

I agree that having a trade or an apprenticeship is just as good, and she should be supporting her daughter, not berating her for failing to make the family look 'middle class!' She would not do well at uni anyway if she only achieved 2 U's and one E, and probably 'was' only applying to appease her bossy mother, Wouldn't surprise me if she didn't flunk her A levels on purpose!

Is the mother annoyed because her DD had the ability but wasted 2 years in college sitting A levels that she then failed, either by choice or lack of effort.

As a mother I would be annoyed if my DD had wasted her time and been downright lazy for 2 years. In DD 6th form they were not allowed to register for A levels if they didn't have a B in the subject and you usually know by AS level if they are coping with the step up.

The girl in question had gone to the trouble of applying to Uni and picking firm and insurance. If she didn't want to go she should have spoke up not failed the exams on purpose.

Does it reflect well on parents if their off spring go to uni, I'm going to go with yes it does. But it also reflects well on a parent if a child leaves school at 16/18 and starts on a a training course or gets a job and shows maturity and a sense of purpose.

In other people's eyes and to a degree your own, everything your child does is in part a reflection of how you have raised and supported them. I have heard from my mothers lips "that's not how I raised them" when one of my siblings made a very bad choice in life partner and changed but my mother raised us all to have the strength and courage to live our own lives and that is what my sibling was doing!

Funky_Bold_Ribena

pukkamum wrote: »

But you clearly had a goal in mind and the determination to suceed, by mickey mouse degree I am referring to the easier degrees taken purely because someone wants the uni experience of drinking, socialising etc or they think it is a way into a guaranteed high earning position.
I know many people who went to uni, racked up a mountain of debt, ruined their livers, only to be doing a job they could have got straight from college and be much further up the ladder.

You didn't mention anything about that, you stated that media was a Mickey Mouse degree. Whatever that's supposed to mean. If you think any degree is easy then be my guest...it's a hard slog and people like you who disrespect people who have done their degrees just because you read the Daily Mail and picked up a slogan should keep their noses out of commenting on other people's hard work. As you have absolutely no idea what you are blathering on about.

Bennifred

Tropez wrote: »

.......................................
Parents who feel that their reputation is at stake if their kids grow up and do something they disapprove of generally seem to want to live vicariously through their children - I don't believe this is healthy.

I wouldn't be best pleased if one of my children turned to crime - I would think it reflected on me, reasonable or not

poet123

Like it or not there are "easier" and "harder" degrees. Architecture for example, is an extremely demanding degree, as are Dentistry and Medicine.

Every child is different, all ours went to university, and it is likely the youngest one will too, but had any of them not wanted to or not had the academic ability to get there and graduate we would not have pushed them to do so.

That said, having made the decision to go down the route leading to uni we did expect them to choose a degree which was career orientated rather than one done from interest with the hope of it leading to a career.

pukkamum

Funky_Bold_Ribena wrote: »

You didn't mention anything about that, you stated that media was a Mickey Mouse degree. Whatever that's supposed to mean. If you think any degree is easy then be my guest...it's a hard slog and people like you who disrespect people who have done their degrees just because you read the Daily Mail and picked up a slogan should keep their noses out of commenting on other people's hard work. As you have absolutely no idea what you are blathering on about.

I certainly do not read the daily mail and I know for a fact that certain degrees are a lot easier to get than others.
If you truly believe that every person out there with a degree is highly intelligent and deserves a highly paid position, then you have no idea what you are talking about.
My sister did a media degree and quite frankly the work she put in to acheive it was minimal.