Enjoying the Sunshine whilst Saving for the Rainy Day

abba1772

hohum wrote: »

Just to chime in here (sorry, it feels a bit weird when I mostly lurk on your thread and then just stick me oar in) close family member of mine was diagnosed with chronic fatigue, she would have been about your age when diagnosed. The physical symptoms were absolutely real. However she also says looking back now - she has since recovered in that she doesn't experience those symptoms - she says she comes from a background where people don't 'do' depression. She also says that whether she was able to articulate what was going on mentally/ emotionally or not, her body made the choice for her. It was one of those weird ones where the physical symptoms are absolutely, completely real but the cause is a bit murkier. It's also clear looking back that she was under a large amount of stress, with high demands and workload.

She recovered by accepting that her job was to get well, and accepting that 'just getting on with it' actually was detrimental to her health. It was a weird time to be around, and I don't think it was easy for her to not just push on as she normally would. Am sharing because I think it's worth taking what body is telling you seriously, and being well is also worth taking seriously. Wellbeing encompasses mental health too.

However you feel most comfortable addressing it, I'd keep bugging for support and ruling out other medical diagnoses..and also start putting in more things that support your wellbeing into your routine. So housework may slip. So what. So you may slow on debt repayment. So what. It's the spoons thing. You have so much energy, choose wisely where you invest it. Health is the biggest priority.

You might be onto sometime here as I totally can relate to the stress/ not doing the down thing it's me down to a T!!!!! My hubby in the last (before I met him) suffered from depression dealt with it with anti depressants he's now off the tabs but he does occasionally have down days but I just let him ride them out if that makes sense. I stress if I can't keep on top of housework ironing my jobs paperwork so might need to take a look at some things that seem to be a trigger for my tiredness xx

liltdiddylilt

Hohum I think you are absolutely on the nail there. I come from a family of doers and stress and depression is just not the done thing. It has been said that a lot of conditions, such as CFS/Fibro, the 'Spoonie' related illnesses that mean you look fine but feel terrible are actually symptomatic of mental issues. I am not saying anyone is mental or faking it, but just that sometimes when we cope and cope and cope, the body eventually sits down and says 'nope, no more, I am just not doing it'

My little sister has fibromyalgia & what you said Abba, really made me laugh. I have a lot of the symptoms but I refuse to be put in the same book as her and I just get on with it and don't try to be classified. Sister likes the attention, she is a complete fruitloop!

Lucky & DFW you are both superhuman and have so much on your plate is it any wonder you get tired and/or down without anything medically there to clarify the situation. I am not saying start popping anti-depressants... but do try and find a little bit of time in there for yourselves. It is no use busting a gut keeping everyone else afloat only to sink yourself and take them all down with you.

Lots of love... xx

please-let-me-be-lucky

Cheers Lilt. I'm not superhuman (but I do occasionally wear my pants on top of my trousers :rotfl:). Lots to think about in the last few comments though, thank you everyone.

DF(w) the furniture looks great Xx

liltdiddylilt

Oh man I forgot to comment about the furniture!!!

It is absolutely beautiful and I am completely in love with your table and chairs... If you are ever fleabaying them... shout me first

P.S Lucky, I see you with your superman pants xx

*Robin*

liltdiddylilt wrote: »

It has been said that a lot of conditions, such as CFS/Fibro, the 'Spoonie' related illnesses that mean you look fine but feel terrible are actually symptomatic of mental issues. I am not saying anyone is mental or faking it, but just that sometimes when we cope and cope and cope, the body eventually sits down and says 'nope, no more, I am just not doing it'

:wall:
Know you didn't mean to sound disparaging Lilt, but ...

liltdiddylilt wrote: »

My little sister has fibromyalgia & what you said Abba, really made me laugh. I have a lot of the symptoms but I refuse to be put in the same book as her and I just get on with it and don't try to be classified. Sister likes the attention, she is a complete fruitloop!

If that's true, you're doing yourself no favours by 'soldiering on'.


Will say no more as don't wish to de-rail DFw's thread.

debtfreewannabe321

abba1772 wrote: »

I generally keep it myself too as my mum is seriously lazy but blames it on a medical condition :rotfl: when really she loves her bed more than anything xx so I refuse to complain as I will not be compared to her

I think this hits the nail on the head! I've a few members of my family who've done the same and my sister has been diagnosed with fibromalgyia but is a little like me in the fact she will just try and keep going (has to with a job & small kids) and yet as soon as people found out they tarred her with the same brush and I do feel quite sorry for her. When she's bad she is bed bound with it sometimes for weeks

hohum wrote: »

Just to chime in here (sorry, it feels a bit weird when I mostly lurk on your thread and then just stick me oar in) close family member of mine was diagnosed with chronic fatigue, she would have been about your age when diagnosed. The physical symptoms were absolutely real. However she also says looking back now - she has since recovered in that she doesn't experience those symptoms - she says she comes from a background where people don't 'do' depression. She also says that whether she was able to articulate what was going on mentally/ emotionally or not, her body made the choice for her. It was one of those weird ones where the physical symptoms are absolutely, completely real but the cause is a bit murkier. It's also clear looking back that she was under a large amount of stress, with high demands and workload.

She recovered by accepting that her job was to get well, and accepting that 'just getting on with it' actually was detrimental to her health. It was a weird time to be around, and I don't think it was easy for her to not just push on as she normally would. Am sharing because I think it's worth taking what body is telling you seriously, and being well is also worth taking seriously. Wellbeing encompasses mental health too.

However you feel most comfortable addressing it, I'd keep bugging for support and ruling out other medical diagnoses..and also start putting in more things that support your wellbeing into your routine. So housework may slip. So what. So you may slow on debt repayment. So what. It's the spoons thing. You have so much energy, choose wisely where you invest it. Health is the biggest priority.

I think I am coming more and more to your family members way of thinking lately, I just am finding it impossible to actually get up and carry on some days and on those days I am in bed at 7pm. The washing up is not done, the kids are left to DH to sort out and I do very little. I've been tested for a whole list of things and I know what is wrong with me (that has been wrong with me since forever....the borderline anaemia, the low white cell count etc) and all these things added to the constant tiredness just defeats me sometimes. With small kids, a husband away and other obligations I have to sometimes just soldier on (at least until 7pm ) Thanks for coming out of lurkdom by the way

abba1772 wrote: »

You might be onto sometime here as I totally can relate to the stress/ not doing the down thing it's me down to a T!!!!! My hubby in the last (before I met him) suffered from depression dealt with it with anti depressants he's now off the tabs but he does occasionally have down days but I just let him ride them out if that makes sense. I stress if I can't keep on top of housework ironing my jobs paperwork so might need to take a look at some things that seem to be a trigger for my tiredness xx

I've been depressed and this feels different totally. When I get depressed I generally get it pretty bad, feel as if a black cloud is over me, feel suicidal, don't have any happy thoughts whatsoever etc and this is just pure and simple exhaustion and aches. I guess it could be a different type of depression, maybe? I was clinically depressed as well as at other times having had post natal depression (god you may as well just write me off :rotfl:)

debtfreewannabe321

liltdiddylilt wrote: »

Hohum I think you are absolutely on the nail there. I come from a family of doers and stress and depression is just not the done thing. It has been said that a lot of conditions, such as CFS/Fibro, the 'Spoonie' related illnesses that mean you look fine but feel terrible are actually symptomatic of mental issues. I am not saying anyone is mental or faking it, but just that sometimes when we cope and cope and cope, the body eventually sits down and says 'nope, no more, I am just not doing it'

My little sister has fibromyalgia & what you said Abba, really made me laugh. I have a lot of the symptoms but I refuse to be put in the same book as her and I just get on with it and don't try to be classified. Sister likes the attention, she is a complete fruitloop!

Lucky & DFW you are both superhuman and have so much on your plate is it any wonder you get tired and/or down without anything medically there to clarify the situation. I am not saying start popping anti-depressants... but do try and find a little bit of time in there for yourselves. It is no use busting a gut keeping everyone else afloat only to sink yourself and take them all down with you.

Lots of love... xx

:rotfl: @ the fruit loop....sorry I've only once heard that phrase before and it was from my mad neighbour screaming it at me (and texting me it!!) :rotfl: Perhaps I am one :eek: I wish I were superhuman.......alas, not quite

please-let-me-be-lucky wrote: »

Cheers Lilt. I'm not superhuman (but I do occasionally wear my pants on top of my trousers :rotfl:). Lots to think about in the last few comments though, thank you everyone.

DF(w) the furniture looks great Xx

:T DS2 often wears his pants over his trousers, perhaps he is some sort of superhero and I can get him to help around the house :rotfl:

liltdiddylilt wrote: »

Oh man I forgot to comment about the furniture!!!

It is absolutely beautiful and I am completely in love with your table and chairs... If you are ever fleabaying them... shout me first

P.S Lucky, I see you with your superman pants xx

:T:D

debtfreewannabe321

*Robin* wrote: »

:wall:
Know you didn't mean to sound disparaging Lilt, but ...



If that's true, you're doing yourself no favours by 'soldiering on'.


Will say no more as don't wish to de-rail DFw's thread.

:T Say what you like Robin! Everyone is entitled to their own opinions . With DH away now until mid-Oct I've no choice but to soldier on to a certain extent....although DH will argue it's him that's doing the soldiering on :rotfl:

debtfreewannabe321

Evening all!

Well none of the kids are in bed yet. DS1 is at a parent's evening doing tours around the school. A privilege reserved for prefects! SO with DH away I have had to keep kids up to collect him at 8pm. Today I planned on having a quiet day. Hmmmm well it didn't really happen and now i'm wiped out again and also have a cold. I ended up going in to town with a couple of friends (one who is leaving in a couple of weeks asked me as it might be last chance we get to do something together) it was fun and breakfast wasn't expensive so a nice treat. I bought some bits I needed from my spending money for the month and also a few household items so saved a few pennies there as I managed to get them in the cheapy shops rather than the SM.

I have also bought another big present for ds1 for his birthday. He has been after an 1phone for years! So when I saw a friend selling one (4s so not a new one) in excellent condition I jumped at the chance. It means I can cancel my phone contract next month, take on ds1's old one until his contract runs out and let ds1 have this phone with a payg sim. However at just over £100 I have had to juggle the budget a little as I wasn't going to put money into the savings for birthdays/christmas until the tenancy money came in! All done now though and ynab up to date with bills going out/money in and out and transfers to savings

This afternoon I went to my meditation group only to find the lady running it wading in water! So we had a cuppa whilst the washing machine repair man fixed her washer for her :rotfl: I've bought a new cd and downloaded it to my phone for meditations as was getting a bit bored with the ones I have so I am going to set time aside every single day to do this as I always feel better for doing it. I'm determined to be back to full health before DH is back!

Right gotta run as ds1 has finished a little early and text me demanding to know where I am!!

debtfreewannabe321

My days just seem to run away from me at the moment! I can't believe it's Friday already tomorrow!

Had a busy day again, volunteering, shopping (a1di & sainsbug), picking up and dropping off friends to shops because their car was out of service, dog walking, dinner, swimming lessons (not for me thankfully :rotfl:) and washing up and cleaning. I've only just put the washing machine on which is a little annoying as we've had a lovely breezy sunny day, perfect for drying washing! I've reconciled bank and budget and all is well so far. I've had £25 confirmed on TCB so just waiting for it to move to payable so I can claim it. I also have around £180 still pending, which would come in handy if it is paid before xmas :cool:

I'm volunteering again tomorrow and will be running around a soft play centre after 2 kids whilst their dad has some respite and a chat with a member of HS, I think he's disabled but not been told much so will find out tomorrow. Will make a nice change from the office, i'm definitely not an office girl I get so bored looking at a computer and a blank wall and i'm only there for a few hours !

Food shopping today was around the £100 mark and I got lots of dinners so am pleased with that :T Also a bottle of pinot blush fell into the trolley, unsure how that happened :whistle: but now it's there I suppose it'd be rude not to drink it

I am sorry I haven't caught up with you all, I get through some diaries and i've noticed it seems to be the same diaries each time I work from the top down and I must be logging on the same time as certain others each day and so get around to posting on their diary as they're pushed up and neglecting everyone elses very sorry and I will try and rectify once I get 10 mins to myself .
I hope you're all ok anyway?! :A