Enjoying the Sunshine whilst Saving for the Rainy Day

debtfreewannabe321

maddiemay wrote: »

Hi there, we "bump into each other" on Steph's blog from time to time, I have been away for a few days and just catching up on a few diaries in DFW land.

I am so sorry about the news regarding your dad, and I hope for a positive outcome for him, more virtual hugs from me. (I know, from when the life of a family member of mine was touch and go some months ago, how much the support from virtual friends on one of the threads that I regularly post on kept me going and helped me stay strong to support others).

MM

Hi maddie, welcome I've missed my virtual buddies these last couple of days but DS1 has taken the computer so he could do his coursework ...i've nicked it back this morning before he wakes up so I can catch up on everyone

mummytogirls wrote: »

So sorry to read about the recent news DFW, lets hope its the best outcome, will keep everything crossed xx

:A

PinotGrigio41 wrote: »

Keep posting DFW and dropping by for those virtual hugs.

I disappeared last year when my dad was ill and if Im honest looking back now, it probably would have been better to have had some support on here although Im not sure how I would have had the time to post.. There wasn't much support from RL friends, maybe they didnt know what to say. I was actually shocked and stunned by how they reacted and even now a few months down the line some of them have never even mentioned it or asked how I am. Anyway, enough about me, I just want you to know that I am thinking of you xxx

I haven't told many RL people, it's just not something you bring up in every day conversation really :huh: so I've told a few that I see every day on the school run as they could tell something was up, but they aren't close friends and we only chat on the 5 min walk to and from school ...luckily I have 2 sisters to talk to should I need some support we're quite good at propping each other up. I think you find out who your good friends are when something bad happens xx

debtfreewannabe321

Alice_in_Poorland wrote: »

So sorry to hear the news about your Dad. I do agree with you about keeping it from DS1 at the moment, too many if's, but's and maybe's until after the MRI. Got everything crossed for you all. Look after yourself too.

Xx

My thoughts exactly....2 weeks of waiting, it's bad enough for those of us who know now (all adults....none of the grandkids have been told) so we'll wait and see what is said at the next meeting...

amber03 wrote: »

Sorry to hear about your dad, at the moment you wont know what to do until your dad has the results of the scan. If possible try to carry on as normal, your dad wont want the grandchildren upset. Usually it falls to one member of the family doing all the running and phoning around and I have a feeling its going to be you. Don't be hard on yourself and remember to come onto these boards and let off steam(as they say).

Take care.x

It usually falls to me, not sure why. I'm the eldest Grandchild on both parent's sides so I've always had the responsibility of letting everyone know bad news meaning I get to think about it more than I would like as I have to relay it so many times. I'm trying to carry on as normal but every now and then get waves of guilt that I am healthy and carrying on, and what is poor dad going through. Suppose that's normal though so I just let it pass in it's own time :A

Baldybear wrote: »

Sorry to hear about your dad, my dad had bowel cancer, not sure if they caught it early (dont remember) but he had a colostomy, wasnt great but recovered enough and had a reversal, that was about 10 years ago and he is still going strong so not all bad news

Thank you for sharing that BB that gives me some hope. As I mentioned before (maybe?) I haven't met anyone before with bowel cancer, lots in my family have had cancer actually but generally women and womb and breast cancer but happy to report the majority are still alive or lived beyond the illness so I just hope he hasn't left it too late to get it sorted out now..........

debtfreewannabe321

Good morning, I've been absent because DS1 took the laptop the other night and I never saw it again! I found it nestled under a pillow in his room this morning so quietly stole it back again

I've not heard from dad he's been super busy with work, I admire the fact he's carried on as normal really. My ds1 has his GCSE in a couple of weeks and his prefect interview next week. He's also got a leadership course lined up for one weekend soon so he's super busy which is good I guess because i've been helping him with things so it's kept me busy. I've also had my first meeting with my HS family yesterday (first one by myself anyway) and that went well. Kids are off now for the long weekend and i'm happy, kids at home make me happy

Money is so short, i just can't work out where i'm going wrong on my spreadsheets. It all added up last month and the month before and all I can think is that it's because DH has taken out the life insurances and moved them to my bank account so my DD's have gone up by £100 a month. His wages were £1600 to me this month. I've no idea how much he kept back for himself though and i've tried in the nicest possible way to ask him to move all his wages to my account on pay day as for the mortgage application I thought it would just be easier to show them one bank account with all incomings and outgoings (this makes sense to me anyway!) as at the mo it just looks like he earns whatever goes to me each month which isn't the whole amount... so I worry this could affect how much we can borrow. Well it makes sense to me anyway lol you may all agree with him I told him I was happy to transfer it straight back to him after i'd received it but then at least it shows where it's gone. Oh I don't know, now i'm rambling ....i'll shush up!

So tax credits are due on Tuesday, I would normally transfer straight to the ISA but I am worrying about how low my main account is and my goal this month is to stay out of the emergency funds and build that up asap. I've decided to use the rental income at the end of the month and the child benefit to try and reach the 10k goal (and beyond i hope!) so it's going to be a long, slow slog to reach that elusive goal :cool: never mind. I will get there this month, that I can promise you

I will try and catch up on some of you now before ds1 gets out of bed and tells me he has important coursework to do....and then I spot him half hour later on a game :cool:!!

*Robin*

Sorry to read your worrying medical news, DFw; but good that you're going to meditation group, which will help keep your equilibrium.

Hope DH offered to look after the kids this weekend, giving you the opportunity to visit Dad in peace (rather than imposing a horde of visitors on him, who need entertaining / keeping away from any conversation re Dad's diagnosis).

Cross-posted! Great kids, sleeping in late for you, lol.
Reckon mortgage provider will want to see all bank records - but why hasn't DH increased his contribution to household funds, to cover payments for insurance he has taken out?

debtfreewannabe321

*Robin* wrote: »

Sorry to read your worrying medical news, DFw; but good that you're going to meditation group, which will help keep your equilibrium.

Hope DH offered to look after the kids this weekend, giving you the opportunity to visit Dad in peace (rather than imposing a horde of visitors on him, who need entertaining / keeping away from any conversation re Dad's diagnosis).

Cross-posted! Great kids, sleeping in late for you, lol.
Reckon mortgage provider will want to see all bank records - but why hasn't DH increased his contribution to household funds, to cover payments for insurance he has taken out?

DH looking after the kids allowing me to drive to Oxford would have been marvellous, as it happens DH is at an Army Rugby game as that's seemingly more important (:mad:) every night this week he's been working till 5ish (usual time) then going to play rugby for 2 hours. Kids are missing him and i'm missing adult company! So, no, there won't be a trip to see dad

As for DH upping his contribution, he feels he pays enough and it just causes arguments. I really hate his attitude sometimes but have just learnt to ignore it otherwise I think I will blow up, which is no good to maintaining that equilibrium !

xx

debtfreewannabe321

I've just converted my tesc0 vouchers into restaurant vouchers for the nice little french red cafe in town £5 worth of vouchers was £20 to spend in there and I think I am due more vouchers soon so will wait and see how much and also convert those. Could be a cheap-ish meal out for DH and myself and some quiet time away from the kids, which I think is needed atm :cool:

grannyx2

I love that restaurant and often use my Tesc0 points to buy their vouchers

Hope you have a good weekend and OH manages to spend some of it with you

Lots of love & hugs

Granny x

Sun_Addict

Sorry to hear about your dad being ill DFW. I found it a great help posting on my diary last year when Mr SA was ill (and am still continuing to do so actually). Hope you get to enjoy the vouchers and hope everything is ok with your dad.

brizzledfw

Hope you have a good day today, despite all the various stresses.

Have to say that with the new MMR rules OH not showing all his regular income will probably not help your application...but maybe a broker or the bank needs to tell him/remind him of that rather than you?

Sorry you can't see your dad, but on the plus side you can see him next week when you know more and it saves you a long drive on a Bank Hol weekend..can you Skype or FaceTime him instead?

Stay posting..can only concur with what PG says..the unconditional support from the folks on here can be worth a few friends in RL. Shouldn't be like that, of course, but so often is.

X

debtfreewannabe321

Thanks for dropping in Brizzle, SA & Granny :hello:

I spoke to my dad on Saturday he was sat in the pub with a pint (suppose I didn't expect any less really!)

I've had a good weekend really, all in all. On Saturday DH was in London for the entire day so we just chilled out at home and watched t.v. I got a phone call at 9pm from a drunken DH that he was stranded and the coach had left without him :mad: I ended up driving all the way to Twickenham and back which took me 4 hours. I could barely keep my eyes open by the time I got home. I was so annoyed with him, he can't handle his drink and stupid things like this happen all the time, I just wonder why a 36 year old man hasn't yet twigged to the fact he can't handle his drink and learnt to curb it (Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr:mad:) Anyway, Sunday was much better and we went to the cinema after chilling out in the garden in the morning. Spiderman 2 was great and we watched in 3d which was a first for DD, DS2 & DH they all loved it (even though I felt like leaving DH home on the naughty step!!!) and we took a little picnic in with us to minimise expenses. Also used my 0deon card and parked a mile away from town for free parking, still though cost was around £38! Yesterday we ended up at a national trust place even though we hadn't set out to go there, we kind of stumbled across it :rotfl:. DH's sisters' came up for the day with their partners and kids so we took a picnic and went to the river, was very odd though as one of the husbands decided to throw a complete strop and walked off and left us all :huh: we carried on and between us we 4 times spotted him by bushes a few hundred yards behind us?! How strange?!!!! He'd got into a fight apparently with DH's sister (his wife) in the car and so decided to be an utter fool and do this instead of forgetting the argument and carrying on with the day?! Oh the argument was about where to park .....:rotfl: it reminded me of arguments i've had with DH but we have never done anything as strange as this :rotfl: When their two children kept throwing tantrums to get their own way all day long, I could see where they had gotten it from! Anyway aside from that strange part to the day and the unexpected trip to London it was a good weekend overall Petrol spends are not great though thanks to all the BIG and little trips so will have to have a look at the bank account today and see how it is :cool:

Hope everyone has had a good weekend