We'd like to remind Forumites to please avoid political debate on the Forum. This is to keep it a safe and useful space for MoneySaving discussions. Threads that are - or become - political in nature may be removed in line with the Forum’s rules. Thank you for your understanding.
Have anyone have had a boss who is a psychopath?
Coraline
Posts: 402 Forumite
Hi all,
This has been on my mind for a while and I think I'm working for a textbook psychopath. I'm no psychologist, but I know enough about the subject to see the traits. All of this crystalised suddenly yesterday afternoon after witnessing her scream and shout at my colleague (3 other people heard it) in a meeting.
Then in my 1-1 meeting had a very strange conversation where most of it revolved the boss telling me that I am too defensive, I take on too much work (huh?), and accusing me of trying to cover up a mistake in the department's vision statment's wording (which crazily enough happened before I even started working there, and I have proof). I'm still not sure what to think of this. My colleague who got the worse end of the stick is thinking of quitting monday, and one of the temps just announced she's leaving as soon as possible.
Anyway I found the 20 traits of a psychopath online and kinda summed up the ones that are applicable.
Has anybody else experienced working for someone with this type of behaviour? It's beyond bullying at this point. I also want to make clear that it's not just about me, the word is spreading fast and at least a dozen people have told me they've been treated the same way, and one person who knows this person from 10 years back said that 3 employees have walked out on the spot because of this treatment and countless numbers have been reduced to tears after one of their "meetings."
Anyway here is what I sussed up...it's long but I just need to get it off my chest as I certainly don't want to talk about it at work...
The twenty traits assessed by the PCL-R score are:
1) Glib and superficial charm: Absolutely, façade of charm and openness in front of superiors and stakeholders. Façade disappears when dealing with subordinates one-to-one.
2) Grandiose (exaggeratedly high) estimation of self: Claims that will “revolutionise this department of the NHS”
3) Need for stimulation: Not sure, but constant, almost frantic pattern of speech, rushing back and forth.
4) Pathological lying: Not sure if it’s lying or complete absent-mindedness. Repeated behaviour of claiming to have said this, but in fact said or written the contrary. Constantly blaming subordinates for not listening.
5) Cunning and manipulativeness: Getting the impression in meetings that words are twisted to constantly make subordinates feel like they are the cause of the problem.
6) Lack of remorse or guilt: Explodes in angry shouting outbursts when stressed, humiliating subordinates (sometimes in front of other people). It is known fact that this person has a large track record of sending people into tears. It has happened to six people (including myself) in the past 4 months.
7) Shallow affect (superficial emotional responsiveness): Hard to explain but seems very disinterested or unresponsive to how people (unless it is someone who is superior/needs someonthing from) feel.
8) Callousness and lack of empathy: Same as #7
9) Parasitic lifestyle: Don’t know
10) Poor behavioral controls: Same as #6—extremely poor control of emotions when stressed, screams and shouts over minor / petty mistakes. Constantly expressing signs of paranoia that a colleague is trying to backstab, that superiors are trying to “stich her up” and says many times that “people are trying to make her look stupid.” Strong physical displays of anger and frustration, slamming doors, pounding head into hands.
11) Sexual promiscuity: Don’t know.
12) Early behavior problems : Don’t know
13) Lack of realistic long-term goals: Not Applicable
14) Impulsivity: Consistent track record of coming up with ideas, ordering employees to carry out last minute tasks, then changing mind next day, or in some cases next hour. Then later time blaming the employee for “taking on too much work.”
15) Irresponsibility: Same as #16
16) Failure to accept responsibility for own actions: All the !!!!!!! time—it’s always someone else’s fault. Belittles subordinates, calls the idiots behind their backs (I have witnessed this as well as others).
17) Many short-term marital relationships : N/A
18) Juvenile delinquency: N/A
19) Revocation of conditional release: N/A
20) Criminal versatility: N/A
Source: http://www.minddisorders.com/Flu-Inv/Hare-Psychopathy-Checklist.html
This has been on my mind for a while and I think I'm working for a textbook psychopath. I'm no psychologist, but I know enough about the subject to see the traits. All of this crystalised suddenly yesterday afternoon after witnessing her scream and shout at my colleague (3 other people heard it) in a meeting.
Then in my 1-1 meeting had a very strange conversation where most of it revolved the boss telling me that I am too defensive, I take on too much work (huh?), and accusing me of trying to cover up a mistake in the department's vision statment's wording (which crazily enough happened before I even started working there, and I have proof). I'm still not sure what to think of this. My colleague who got the worse end of the stick is thinking of quitting monday, and one of the temps just announced she's leaving as soon as possible.
Anyway I found the 20 traits of a psychopath online and kinda summed up the ones that are applicable.
Has anybody else experienced working for someone with this type of behaviour? It's beyond bullying at this point. I also want to make clear that it's not just about me, the word is spreading fast and at least a dozen people have told me they've been treated the same way, and one person who knows this person from 10 years back said that 3 employees have walked out on the spot because of this treatment and countless numbers have been reduced to tears after one of their "meetings."
Anyway here is what I sussed up...it's long but I just need to get it off my chest as I certainly don't want to talk about it at work...
The twenty traits assessed by the PCL-R score are:
1) Glib and superficial charm: Absolutely, façade of charm and openness in front of superiors and stakeholders. Façade disappears when dealing with subordinates one-to-one.
2) Grandiose (exaggeratedly high) estimation of self: Claims that will “revolutionise this department of the NHS”
3) Need for stimulation: Not sure, but constant, almost frantic pattern of speech, rushing back and forth.
4) Pathological lying: Not sure if it’s lying or complete absent-mindedness. Repeated behaviour of claiming to have said this, but in fact said or written the contrary. Constantly blaming subordinates for not listening.
5) Cunning and manipulativeness: Getting the impression in meetings that words are twisted to constantly make subordinates feel like they are the cause of the problem.
6) Lack of remorse or guilt: Explodes in angry shouting outbursts when stressed, humiliating subordinates (sometimes in front of other people). It is known fact that this person has a large track record of sending people into tears. It has happened to six people (including myself) in the past 4 months.
7) Shallow affect (superficial emotional responsiveness): Hard to explain but seems very disinterested or unresponsive to how people (unless it is someone who is superior/needs someonthing from) feel.
8) Callousness and lack of empathy: Same as #7
9) Parasitic lifestyle: Don’t know
10) Poor behavioral controls: Same as #6—extremely poor control of emotions when stressed, screams and shouts over minor / petty mistakes. Constantly expressing signs of paranoia that a colleague is trying to backstab, that superiors are trying to “stich her up” and says many times that “people are trying to make her look stupid.” Strong physical displays of anger and frustration, slamming doors, pounding head into hands.
11) Sexual promiscuity: Don’t know.
12) Early behavior problems : Don’t know
13) Lack of realistic long-term goals: Not Applicable
14) Impulsivity: Consistent track record of coming up with ideas, ordering employees to carry out last minute tasks, then changing mind next day, or in some cases next hour. Then later time blaming the employee for “taking on too much work.”
15) Irresponsibility: Same as #16
16) Failure to accept responsibility for own actions: All the !!!!!!! time—it’s always someone else’s fault. Belittles subordinates, calls the idiots behind their backs (I have witnessed this as well as others).
17) Many short-term marital relationships : N/A
18) Juvenile delinquency: N/A
19) Revocation of conditional release: N/A
20) Criminal versatility: N/A
Source: http://www.minddisorders.com/Flu-Inv/Hare-Psychopathy-Checklist.html
0
Comments
-
What you describe is a manager out of their depth. That makes them bad at their job, not mentally ill!0
-
My diagnosis, you have a horrible boss.0
-
There have been a number of studies that have shown that company managers have more than the 'normal' percentage of psychopaths - many psychopathic traits such as ruthlessness and lack of compassion, also happen to be those that many consider as being important when building up and running a company.
http://money.msn.com/now/post--your-boss-just-may-be-a-psychopath
Personally, I don't really think it's helpful to self diagnose people and put labels on them though....0 -
jacques_chirac wrote: »What you describe is a manager out of their depth. That makes them bad at their job, not mentally ill!
Pyschopathy isn't a mental illness, it's more of a severe personality trait or disorder. I didn't mean psychopath like the one who lived in the Bates Hotel with his dead mum!
http://www.fbi.gov/stats-services/publications/law-enforcement-bulletin/november-2012/the-corporate-psychopath0 -
p00hsticks wrote: »There have been a number of studies that have shown that company managers have more than the 'normal' percentage of psychopaths - many psychopathic traits such as ruthlessness and lack of compassion, also happen to be those that many consider as being important when building up and running a company.
http://money.msn.com/now/post--your-boss-just-may-be-a-psychopath
That's an interesting article--somewhat along the line of this one I was reading this morning.
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/business/comment/brian-basham-beware-corporate-psychopaths--they-are-still-occupying-positions-of-power-6282502.htmlp00hsticks wrote: »Personally, I don't really think it's helpful to self diagnose people and put labels on them though....
Why not? I'm no expert like I said but I think it's very helpful to try to understand who you're dealing with and what makes them tick so you know how to respond. We all do this to a degree with everyone we interact with in our lives.
This is just an extreme example.0 -
Pyschopathy isn't a mental illness, it's more of a severe personality trait or disorder. I didn't mean psychopath like the one who lived in the Bates Hotel with his dead mum!
http://www.fbi.gov/stats-services/publications/law-enforcement-bulletin/november-2012/the-corporate-psychopath
You are thinking of an antisocial personality disorder, but then that doesn't sound nearly as dramatic as 'psychopath' does it?
I do have some sympathy for your manager. They may not be very good at their job, but that must be made all the more difficult when their staff are branding them in such derogatory terms. Perhaps you could focus more on helping rather than deriding them?0 -
Yes I have worked for a psychopath. My advice is to get out as quick as you can. It won't end well otherwise.0
-
I reckon Psycopathy must be a requirement for the job of boss, Coraline.
All my old bosses had those traits.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Any more posts you want to make on something you obviously know very little about?"
Is an actual reaction to my posts, so please don't rely on anything I say.
0 -
jacques_chirac wrote: »You are thinking of an antisocial personality disorder, but then that doesn't sound nearly as dramatic as 'psychopath' does it?
I do have some sympathy for your manager. They may not be very good at their job, but that must be made all the more difficult when their staff are branding them in such derogatory terms. Perhaps you could focus more on helping rather than deriding them?
I think people think of the wrong thing when they hear the word "psychopath" as it's morphed in media to describe a violent murderer or such.
I never branded the manager in this way at work, and certainly don't intend to (as I said in my initial post, I would not want that spread about).
As for the staff, when the boss explode in anger and yells at colleagues...well what else are they going to think? I can assure you it's not a case of the team ganging up against the boss. I've worked in quite a few places over my career and never seen anything like this.
How am I suppose to help this boss? Serious question, if you have any tips or suggestions I really would welcome them.0 -
Yes I have worked for a psychopath. My advice is to get out as quick as you can. It won't end well otherwise.
Thank you...that is my plan. But I have to handle it delicately as obviously my references would go back to her.
I would like to transfer to another area in the NHS...and there is an opening actually in the same building for a role that I have much experience in. But the person that I would be working for is currently working with my current boss on a project, so right away my boss would know I'm looking!
Just up and quitting isn't an option, it's a case of finding something first.0
This discussion has been closed.
Confirm your email address to Create Threads and Reply
Categories
- All Categories
- 348.9K Banking & Borrowing
- 252.4K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
- 452.7K Spending & Discounts
- 241.8K Work, Benefits & Business
- 618.3K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
- 176K Life & Family
- 254.8K Travel & Transport
- 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
- 16.1K Discuss & Feedback
- 15.1K Coronavirus Support Boards