Providing spending money for child going on hol

FBaby

pinkladyof66 wrote: »

I cant personally comment on what money is acceptable and who should pay for what as I would not let my 10 year old child away on holiday other people unless it was family...

Even people you know well? Even on the school trip?

FatVonD

Maybe a good way to go about it might be to give both girls £10 pocket money (but then you run the risk that the other already has pocket money so then yours has less.) Perhaps ask in advance what pocket money friend will be getting, if it's a fiver give yours £15 and the friend a tenner and say, in front of everybody, 'there you go, I'm giving you £10 as daughter has £15 so now you both have the same. Have fun!'

Though really you'd already done your bit by gifting the vouchers...

jellyhead

FatVonD wrote: »

Maybe a good way to go about it might be to give both girls £10 pocket money (but then you run the risk that the other already has pocket money so then yours has less.) Perhaps ask in advance what pocket money friend will be getting, if it's a fiver give yours £15 and the friend a tenner and say, in front of everybody, 'there you go, I'm giving you £10 as daughter has £15 so now you both have the same. Have fun!'

Though really you'd already done your bit by gifting the vouchers...

Yes, but I can see how it would be awkward if the host child doesn't have any money for some reason.

I would hand over some money to both of them as spending money, as you said, and ask how much the host child has and make sure that my child had the same ... actually, I'd ask first, in case the host child had more than I was expecting

But also give money towards the food.

I don't really 'get' the posts about how the daughter got a good deal to be honest. It wasn't a holiday that the OP asked for or planned, and who knows whether she could actually afford to hand over £60 for a few days where she might have previously planned for her daughter to play with friends and cost very little. Maybe OP's other child now also wants an expensive treat or extra holiday?

Maybe it even means they can't afford a family holiday this year. I wouldn't assume that just because the other mum is a single mum that she's necessarily any worse off than the OP.

Perhaps I'm looking at it from a different angle because we are really stretched at the moment, and if somebody offered my child a few days away at a cost of £60 my heart would sink and I'd have to work out if we could still afford our family holiday this summer, which is 3 nights in a travelodge, hardly luxurious.

I've just got back from taking my youngest camping with family and I was really worried about how I could try to get out of going due to the cost. I only went because I was offered transport, and my tent went next to family's caravan so I wasn't charged. We spent most of our time on the beach or exploring the woods and streams around the campsite, collecting sticks for the fire pit, having a family barbeque, etc. where the only unnecessary cost was a £1 bag of marshmallows. £2 for a donkey ride and £10 per child total for the arcade and fairground bit. £1 for a crab line and a bit of bacon pinched from breakfast. £2 for an ice cream but not every day. Most drinks were squash or from cheap supermarket multipacks.

Reading about the amount of money some of you expect to get through in an arcade I'm starting to wonder if perhaps I'm too much of a penny-pincher? They had fun though. I did splurge on a pack of top trumps cards because I'd forgotten to bring some from home.

jellyhead

Funky_Bold_Ribena wrote: »

It is quite obvious that the mother was being sarcastic towards your dd by asking her daughter where her pocket money was, and I suspect that paying for the aquarium was her way of getting a dig in to your dd for it.

Why have a dig at a primary school child though? Does she even understand sarcasm?

balletshoes

pinkladyof66 wrote: »

I cant personally comment on what money is acceptable and who should pay for what as I would not let my 10 year old child away on holiday other people unless it was family...

why not? do you have a 10-year old?

Funky_Bold_Ribena

Spendless wrote: »

This has also suggested to me but for what purpose? To make it so my daughter shared her pocket money with her friend or another reason? I admit I didn't understand the comment and neither did my daughter. If I'd asked the same question to my own kids they'd have replied 'you haven't given me any'.

I have no idea...perhaps she and the other adult had been discussing it and she was annoyed that you had given your DD some money and not given it all to her to look after?

jellyhead

FBaby wrote: »

Even people you know well? Even on the school trip?

Mine go for a 4-night residential at the age of 8 ... sob! I didn't want my eldest to go but he loved it. I don't want youngest to go this year, they've moved it to Autumn so he'll be only just 8 whereas my eldest was almost 9.

But of course he'll go, because he wants to.

FBaby

I don't really understand the thought that only you can look after your children. Other parents, assuming you know them and seem to be raising well balanced mannered children will have the same concerns than you in regards to security and well-being. So why wouldn't they be able to look after your child, unless you child has special needs they might not be familiar with?

paulineb_2

jellyhead wrote: »

Yes, but I can see how it would be awkward if the host child doesn't have any money for some reason.

I would hand over some money to both of them as spending money, as you said, and ask how much the host child has and make sure that my child had the same ... actually, I'd ask first, in case the host child had more than I was expecting

But also give money towards the food.

I don't really 'get' the posts about how the daughter got a good deal to be honest. It wasn't a holiday that the OP asked for or planned, and who knows whether she could actually afford to hand over £60 for a few days where she might have previously planned for her daughter to play with friends and cost very little. Maybe OP's other child now also wants an expensive treat or extra holiday?

Maybe it even means they can't afford a family holiday this year. I wouldn't assume that just because the other mum is a single mum that she's necessarily any worse off than the OP.

Perhaps I'm looking at it from a different angle because we are really stretched at the moment, and if somebody offered my child a few days away at a cost of £60 my heart would sink and I'd have to work out if we could still afford our family holiday this summer, which is 3 nights in a travelodge, hardly luxurious.

I've just got back from taking my youngest camping with family and I was really worried about how I could try to get out of going due to the cost. I only went because I was offered transport, and my tent went next to family's caravan so I wasn't charged. We spent most of our time on the beach or exploring the woods and streams around the campsite, collecting sticks for the fire pit, having a family barbeque, etc. where the only unnecessary cost was a £1 bag of marshmallows. £2 for a donkey ride and £10 per child total for the arcade and fairground bit. £1 for a crab line and a bit of bacon pinched from breakfast. £2 for an ice cream but not every day. Most drinks were squash or from cheap supermarket multipacks.

Reading about the amount of money some of you expect to get through in an arcade I'm starting to wonder if perhaps I'm too much of a penny-pincher? They had fun though. I did splurge on a pack of top trumps cards because I'd forgotten to bring some from home.

I do know people are short of funds, Im certainly not loaded or anywhere near that and every penny counts

But if the OP couldnt afford for her daughter to go, they could have said that to the other family.

I do still think 3 nights accommodation, meals for 60 pounds (which was for spends and not towards the cost of the holiday) wasnt a bad deal at all

The OP could have sent her daughter away with £30 to give the family and £10 pocket money, how much you actually give your child to take with them is entirely up to you, unless the family taking the child has said they want a certain amount of cash and that is it.

princessdon

£60 seems very low to me. Drinks at a theme park, ice creams, food all add up.

Personally I'd have given the parent what they thought would cover any outgoing (offering to pay more when back if went over), as your DD having her own money causes issues. Eg as a parent I couldn't buy mine ice creams then leave a friend out if they had no spends left, I'd also not like a friend spending money and mine being left out.

I'd do the same as the other child. Eg, if the mother covered all outgoings and allowed £5 for souvenirs, then I'd treat the same and agree a price in advance with an offer to pay if it went over.