What's going on in this man's head: round 2

meritaten

I cant believe you still think this man is worth the effort you are putting into this relationship! I find him downright creepy! his attitude to you is really very strange...........he wants you for sex alone - its fine if that's all YOU want to - then he strings you along by saying things designed to make you think you have a future (yes, I remember your previous thread VERY well!). its ok for him to see others - but he doesn't like it if you do, every time you try to pull away he gives you a sob story or reels you back in by hinting of a future.
If I were you I would move away! this guy is trouble and I can see a real disaster in your future. if not a tragedy. he isn't jealous because he LOVES you! he is jealous because his property (you sweety, you!) could be taken by someone else! Wise up sweety!

the_pink_panther_2

meritaten wrote: »

I cant believe you still think this man is worth the effort you are putting into this relationship! I find him downright creepy! his attitude to you is really very strange...........he wants you for sex alone - its fine if that's all YOU want to - then he strings you along by saying things designed to make you think you have a future (yes, I remember your previous thread VERY well!). its ok for him to see others - but he doesn't like it if you do, every time you try to pull away he gives you a sob story or reels you back in by hinting of a future.
If I were you I would move away! this guy is trouble and I can see a real disaster in your future. if not a tragedy. he isn't jealous because he LOVES you! he is jealous because his property could be taken by someone else! Wise up sweety!

I don't know about creepy as much as down right whiney... I mean, he tells you he cries about losing you but at the same time he doesn't want you. How selfish can you get.

[Deleted User]

Isnt it Op, that your confused and you don't listen.
He doesn't want a relationship, he doesn't have to whilst your on tap..
How many times, and yes I bet you still go back to him after the holiday.
Get a grip, delete his number, block him on Fbook if you have him on there and ignore him altogether.
I had this with a guy 3 years ago and it took me a whole YEAR to get rid of him, I got bored of the I don't want to be with you, but I don't want to let you go either.
Tough, if he wanted to be with you, he would. Hes playing with you good and proper and your letting him.
You must want this.....

meritaten

it isn't just the OP being naive - I can see this guy is playing her. he is cynical and manipulative and OP is only seeing the 'charm' at the moment. it costs him nothing to be 'nice' to sound supportive and pretend to be 'honest' about not wanting a relationship. er - if he really doesn't want a relationship he would be sticking to one night stands don't you think? instead he has instigated a 'friendship with benefits' and every single time OP has tried to put it on a different level he pulls back. but OP cant - he cries and enviegles her back. he sends out throwaway lines like 'we could have ............' dangling the carrot of a permanent relationship -THAT is what I find creepy!
he wants you for sex on tap. he wants you EXCLUSIVELY to be HIS sex on tap! sorry, but everything you say about this guy is ringing warning bells in my head! What do you really know about his past relationships apart from what HE has told you? is it the truth? I would try to find out.

[Deleted User]

Hes a player.
You know what they say - A Players only a player when he has someone to play with.

eschaton

OP - did you get your no strings attached weekend shag?

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Oh, that's nice.


He can't be arsed to commit to a full relationship, thereby freeing him up to screw anybody he pleases; so assumes that you are doing exactly the same as that.


Remind me again, why exactly you think he is worth allowing into your bed?

dilemma10

eschaton wrote: »

OP - did you get your no strings attached weekend shag?

With him?

Erm yes I'm embarrassed to say.

Argh!

paulineb_2

dilemma10 wrote: »

With him?

Erm yes I'm embarrassed to say.

Argh!

Well if you are happy with the way things are, thats fine

But I hope you do know theres every possibility that when this man is ready to start dating, it wont be with you

And its very easy to kid yourself on that you dont want any serious relationship, but you might just be setting yourself up for heartache, given that you live near him and you might have to see him with his new gf on a regular basis

Some men and women will take advantage of the fact that they know someone likes them and instead of doing the decent thing and walking away, they'll happily sleep with that person

Until someone else comes along.

paulineb_2

You might think that when he works out what he works out, it will be you he wants to be with, it might well not be you.

Sleeping with someone on a regular basis, no matter how good the sex or the connection is, isnt going to make someone fall for you if thats not how they feel.

I personally think if you dont stop sleeping with him and cut him out of your life, you are just storing up a great big heap of heartache for yourself at a later date.