How do I curb wife's spending

heartbreak_star

Ahhhh so wants not needs then.

She desperately needs to wise up. She's spending £200 a month on nothing.

HBS x

Pay_no_attention

borkid wrote: »

Do you shop on the high street? If you use a supermarket then she pays with her credit card and you transfer the correct amount of money to pay off the food element of her CC bill. Alternatively you could shop online and just give her small amounts of money to get say a loaf of bread or something little in the middle of the week or she could buy the small bits out of her £50 and you reimburse her..

We are still living outside the UK (do not want to say where at this stage) but things like Internet banking and credit cards are still pretty primitive here. Most people are still using cash for everything.

Pay_no_attention

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Ahhhh so wants not needs then.

She desperately needs to wise up. She's spending £200 a month on nothing.

HBS x

Oh yes definitely wants. Last week a designer coat for the winter. It's 40+ degrees where we are at the minute!

DCFC79

OP well done on working on bringing the debt down.

Id explain to her that theres no need for designer coats even in this heat but also ones that are available that are less costly.

DCFC79

Pay_no_attention wrote: »

Most people are still using cash for everything.

Apologies but have you said before that you give her the money in cash ?

Dimey

When you're out of your teens /twenties you don't need to keep buying designer bags etc. You have wardrobes full of them.

Maybe you can divert her addiction to selling her designer gear instead of buying.

Pay_no_attention

dawyldthing wrote: »

I'd tell the 19 year old the bank of dad is now closed and she needs to start fending for herself, but if she wants to save towards a mortgage possibly if you can afford it you will match half again and put it in a pot if it will save you long term. for the wife sounds like you need a heart to heart that you really do only have x amount per month and she needs to budget if she wants to go out as often

I did try and do this when she turned 18. I have fended for myself since I was 15 and worked nearly 60 hours per week back then. I have always worked hard and tried to give my kids the best I can, I felt at 18 she becomes an adult and she should fend for herself. Don't get me wrong she has worked since she turned 16 and studied for her A levels. She had a year off and has been working full time.
I have made the exact offer you suggested regarding saving for her future. At the moment it's fell on deaf ears. I don't think she is mature enough yet.

barbarawright

You say it was your business that went into debt. Was your wife involved in the business? Does she blame you for the debt? Maybe she doesn't feel the debt is her responsibility or that you should be controlling *her* finances when the debt appears to be yours and she's already had a tough time of it. Not saying that she would be right but I think I might feel like that if my partner was doling out pocket money to me

Pay_no_attention

DCFC79 wrote: »

Apologies but have you said before that you give her the money in cash ?

Yes it is in cash.

Dimey

Would this weekly spending diary be of any use?

www.mabs.ie/fileadmin/user_upload/documents/Information...
Edit - the link doesn't go to the diary I'm afraid. You'll have to browse the site.


And this average expenditures may help perspective:-

http://www.ons.gov.uk/ons/rel/family-spending/family-spending/family-spending-2012-edition/sum-headlines.html