Best way to deal with colleague making nasty personal comments?

jess1974

I had a similar sort of problem myself for a few years, except the comments were aimed at one of my children and not me, anyway she went too far a few months ago and i fell out with her, i really really wish i'd had the guts to comeback with some witty comments myself, i still feel like i did'nt stand up for my son xxx

sassyblue

jess1974 wrote: »

I had a similar sort of problem myself for a few years, except the comments were aimed at one of my children and not me, anyway she went too far a few months ago and i fell out with her, i really really wish i'd had the guts to comeback with some witty comments myself, i still feel like i did'nt stand up for my son xxx

Don't feel too bad Jess, you gave her a chance and she blew it. She won't make that mistake again.

The reprobate who works here is going to get a mouthful in a minute, he's really pushing the limit today.

bacardi66

Thanks for all your replies I really appreciate it.

I haven't seen the unpleasant person much this week as she has been on a course and I found out yesterday that in a few weeks she is moving to work on a different project in another office! So I shall be free of her until we work in the same office again, which hopefully won't be for a good few months

I have decided that if she does say anything rude to me in the meantime, I will just look at her and say "oh that was rude" and carry on with whatever was going on before she said anything.

Much as I would like to give her a rude response (and I would have done if it was a situation outside work) I don't want to put myself in a position where I could be seen as the baddie or the bully. And I don't want to take her aside and speak to her one to one as she could then go round saying I had said all sorts to her and turn things back on me.

So hopefully I can rise above it and in a few weeks I will be shot of her

andygb

duchy wrote: »

A pitying look and the slightly at a tangent "Oh bless you dear" will confuse the heck out of her and make her look really stupid if she's nasty back when you've been super nice when she's made a biatchy comment.

If she doesn't get a reaction and you appear oblivious she'll soon give it up.

An excellent suggestion.
Maybe the pitying look, accompanied by a thoughtful up and down appraisal of the offender, then a slight shake of the head and - "well, well, where do we start with you?";)

ailuro2

If people at work are going too far with me, in a way that indicates their boundaries are misty, I reach out with my pen and draw a line on their hand.... then I tell them that they have just found my "line" and I don't want them to cross it again. Alternatively you can draw a line on a bit of paper and hand it to them.

( I work with blokes, have done for years, and some of them think they can say anything in front of me - they can't!)

I do it in a light hearted manner and it usually lets them know where they stand.

I'd hang off though, if you know she's moving on!