📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!

Husband wants to loan step-brother 600. How to make sure we get it back?

13468912

Comments

  • Dimey
    Dimey Posts: 1,434 Forumite
    Arnie123 wrote: »
    Funky it is a sole tradership and I transferred my drawings to him nothing dodgy in that

    I know it sounds thick with hindsight but I transferre the drawings to him as I constantly am losing my cash card (I have bipolar that massively effects my concentration) I thought if I transferre it to him he would keep it safe

    Oh no he lost 360 on the ppi scam and he had never even bought ppi!

    You might have thought you were doing the right thing to help your bipolar but clearly its proved to be the wrong thing. Husband is worse than you. Actually I think you sound sensible and streetwise.

    Get control of the finances back for the future. Husband really cant be trusted on that front.

    I bet he didn't even tell you he was thinking of doing the ppi scam so you had no chance to save him. Your husband has to start telling you things and working as a couple. His thinking is completely awry.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    "Any more posts you want to make on something you obviously know very little about?"
    Is an actual reaction to my posts, so please don't rely on anything I say. :)
  • Arnie123 wrote: »
    Funky it is a sole tradership and I transferred my drawings to him nothing dodgy in that

    I know it sounds thick with hindsight but I transferre the drawings to him as I constantly am losing my cash card (I have bipolar that massively effects my concentration) I thought if I transferre it to him he would keep it safe

    Oh no he lost 360 on the ppi scam and he had never even bought ppi!

    I have given you a legit argument to enable you to make the point that the business can't start becoming a moneylender...thus giving you a legit way of getting out of this predicament. If you don't use it then that's your lookout. If you do have spare drawings then by all means do what you want with it but there is enough business argument there to get you out of this hole...
    Sanctimonious Veggie. GYO-er. Seed Saver. Get in.
  • Voyager2002
    Voyager2002 Posts: 16,332 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    As has already been posted, the Social Fund will make a payment directly to the Funeral Director. So there is no need to pay up-front. End.. Of... Story.

    I really do not think that your husband should have access to the business account: was the money lost to the PPI scam taken from the business? If so, he has demonstrated that he does not have the financial skills required to accept such a responsibility. I can understand how frustrating it must be when you keep losing your cash card: I suggest you have a meeting with your bank, explain the problem, and ask them to suggest a way for you to gain access to your money. They are legally obliged to find some kind of a solution for you (disability discrimination act).

    Under normal circumstances I would have said that helping out with the funeral for someone close to the family was simple decency. However, it should not be done if that puts your business and your livelihood at risk. I think it would be nice if you could work out some way you could contribute: making cakes sounds like a good suggestion. And of course, the failure of that side of the family to acknowledge your own sad loss is inexcusable, and must affect how you respond to this situation.
  • mcjordi
    mcjordi Posts: 4,238 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    the funeral director will allow installments. once the invoice is raised the dwp will make a cheque payable to the FD not the family/halfbrother
    this is what happened when my mam died when i was at uni and only had my student loan coming in.
    Luckily my dad paid the funeral costs (they were divorced)
    Sealed pot challenger # 10
    1v100 £15/300
  • Dimey
    Dimey Posts: 1,434 Forumite
    edited 13 July 2013 at 12:09PM
    There you go Arnie 123....

    If you both don't want to give the £600 to the family then use Funky Bold Ribena's reason than you can't legally take it from the business.

    If you both want to loan/give the £600 till the DSS/DWP (sorry I'm not familiar) money comes through then use Mcjordi's suggestion.
    You tell the family you'll speak to the funeral director on Monday yourselves. Then make arrangements for the funeral director to get the payment from the DSS/DWP via application from either your husband, his Mother or his stepbrother.

    If the funeral director wants your £600 as a deposit till the DSS money comes through then pay to the funeral director by credit card or a cheque stating "deposit to be returned" and with a covering letter stating the terms that you'll get it back, no one else, when the DSS/DWP money comes through. Get the funeral director to sign your letter in agreement. Keep the family out of it unless you need Mother or Step son to fill in the DSS/DWP application form.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    "Any more posts you want to make on something you obviously know very little about?"
    Is an actual reaction to my posts, so please don't rely on anything I say. :)
  • Arnie123
    Arnie123 Posts: 41 Forumite
    I am washing my hands of the whole thing I will not be speaking to mum in law again who has a blinking cheek asking for this cash and on no circumstances will I be attending the funeral

    Just to add once my mum in law looked after my hubby's cash card as he was afraid he was going to get burgled. She went down to the cash point and emptied the account. The police were called but she said he had asked her to hand him some cash and draw it out for him as he is blind and cannot use cash points.

    Also when he was sick in hospital his pregnant pedigree dog have birth to seven pups. She sold them all for cash and never gave him a penny
  • Arnie123
    Arnie123 Posts: 41 Forumite
    Just to add I am a self employed cleaner And 600 is 100 hours of having my head stuck in an armitage shanks
  • Dimey
    Dimey Posts: 1,434 Forumite
    Arnie123 wrote: »
    I am washing my hands of the whole thing I will not be speaking to mum in law again who has a blinking cheek asking for this cash and on no circumstances will I be attending the funeral

    Just to add once my mum in law looked after my hubby's cash card as he was afraid he was going to get burgled. She went down to the cash point and emptied the account. The police were called but she said he had asked her to hand him some cash and draw it out for him as he is blind and cannot use cash points.

    Also when he was sick in hospital his pregnant pedigree dog have birth to seven pups. She sold them all for cash and never gave him a penny

    Even more reason to take control of your finances Arnie 123. I don't understand why your husband doesn't see it. Is he scared of them?

    Get an appointment with your bank manager and explain what's been going on now and in the past. Explain how you want to protect your business and private funds. Explain the problem with you losing cards. You should be able to work out a safe way to move forward.

    I know how frustrating it is but if your husband wants you to support him at the funeral, please consider going or you might regret it in the future. Your husband might sulk that you didn't support him - ironically in a similar way that he & his family haven't supported you in your loss.
    Be the bigger person.

    If you go - Don't get embroiled in discussion about the money. You've made your opinion known and offered alternative solutions. End of story.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    "Any more posts you want to make on something you obviously know very little about?"
    Is an actual reaction to my posts, so please don't rely on anything I say. :)
  • DCFC79
    DCFC79 Posts: 40,641 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    edited 13 July 2013 at 12:12PM
    Arnie123 wrote: »
    Just to add once my mum in law looked after my hubby's cash card as he was afraid he was going to get burgled. She went down to the cash point and emptied the account. The police were called but she said he had asked her to hand him some cash and draw it out for him as he is blind and cannot use cash points.

    Also when he was sick in hospital his pregnant pedigree dog have birth to seven pups. She sold them all for cash and never gave him a penny

    See now that is just taking the pee/liberties, just makes me angry someones own mother would do that.
  • JuicyJesus
    JuicyJesus Posts: 3,831 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Arnie123 wrote: »
    Just to add once my mum in law looked after my hubby's cash card as he was afraid he was going to get burgled. She went down to the cash point and emptied the account.

    She couldn't have done that unless he told her the PIN.

    And he couldn't take money from your business account unless you told him the PIN.

    Here's a simple solution to any future issues: change your PIN, never tell anyone else your PIN ever again. Tell husband to do the same.

    He is credulous beyond words.
    urs sinserly,
    ~~joosy jeezus~~
This discussion has been closed.
Meet your Ambassadors

🚀 Getting Started

Hi new member!

Our Getting Started Guide will help you get the most out of the Forum

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 351.3K Banking & Borrowing
  • 253.2K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 453.8K Spending & Discounts
  • 244.3K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 599.5K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 177.1K Life & Family
  • 257.8K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 16.2K Discuss & Feedback
  • 37.6K Read-Only Boards

Is this how you want to be seen?

We see you are using a default avatar. It takes only a few seconds to pick a picture.