I thought Id buy you a gift, but didnt.....

time2deal

This_Year wrote: »

Reminded me of a mahoosive row we had on one of my birthdays. A birthday ending in a 0.

On the day he said that he hadn't got me anything as he thought we might go out so I could choose. Marginally disappointed that there wasn't a giftwrapped box to open on the breakfast table, I agreed.

We went into town and wandered around some jewellery shops as I was considering a necklace. I didn't know how much he wanted to spend, so I asked what the budget was; he replied "whatever you want you can have." I would have much rather he said, up to this amount as at the time we were in goldsmiths and everything I looked at and said, "that's nice" he said, "if I had known you wanted to come here I would have got tesco vouchers to make it cheaper..."

So I took it that his budget wasn't that high after all and looked at the lower priced items, he was by then looking at necklaces and bracelets costing £000's. Baffled, I asked him again how much he wanted to spend and he said "I told you whatever you want but you obviously don't know what you would like or you would have chosen by now".

I replied that I wasn't about to choose something costing a thousand pounds only for him to say he wanted to spend fifty, and likewise I didn't want to be looking at the cheaper ranges if he really intended to spend a lot more and he said "forget it then. You don't want anything". And walked out of the shop.

Much later he did buy me a necklace but tbh it was too late.

Wow - did I write this?!? :rotfl: We had exactly the same experience last year. DH said - go and get ANYTHING you want, then we went to a massive mall and he said 'ok, choose something'. I was annoyed, he could at least say 'I wanted to buy you some jewellery/clothes/homewares, but not sure exactly what you wanted so lets go look at x,y and z.' Not just basically walk me to the shops and make me decide, without knowing budget or ideas. Buying a gift is about showing you have thought of someone, not just the money.

So I got nothing in the end, except an argument and a mood from him for days. I'm maybe being a bit precious (which I am not normally) but once a year he could make more of an effort. Its not to do with money. A nice meal, or a thoughtful Groupon voucher, or just doing a job that he knows I need done would be enough, but just sending someone off to 'shop' isn't a gift in my opinion.

phew... end rant!

But you have reminded me that I told my mum recently I meant to get her flowers but forgot. I promised I would surprise her sometime instead, so I have ordered them today for delivery tomorrow.

Treevo

Dunroamin wrote: »

You are allowed to wear earrings.;)

Not if I didn't want to be thrown out of the !!!!!. :eek:

System

I have a friend who used to buy her own birthday and Christmas presents out of their joint account. Apparently it saved her from receiving something she didn't like.:(

I haven't made my mind up whether she was wise or just down right ungrateful!.... However, she is no longer married (to the same man anyway).

Dunroamin

Treevo wrote: »

Not if I didn't want to be thrown out of the !!!!!. :eek:

The forum censorship opens some interesting possibilities as to what you actually said!

shop-to-drop

Haven't you heard 'it's the thought that counts.' LOL!

My DH has always done things like that and it makes me laugh more than anything. He just lets me buy myself anything I like though as long as we can afford it so that's what I do. Better than him getting it wrong and then either wasting money or hurting his feelings.

Dunroamin

We buy things that for each other when we see them and don't particularly worry about tying them in any specific occasion.

Pollycat

This_Year wrote: »

Reminded me of a mahoosive row we had on one of my birthdays. A birthday ending in a 0.

On the day he said that he hadn't got me anything as he thought we might go out so I could choose. Marginally disappointed that there wasn't a giftwrapped box to open on the breakfast table, I agreed.

We went into town and wandered around some jewellery shops as I was considering a necklace. I didn't know how much he wanted to spend, so I asked what the budget was; he replied "whatever you want you can have." I would have much rather he said, up to this amount as at the time we were in goldsmiths and everything I looked at and said, "that's nice" he said, "if I had known you wanted to come here I would have got tesco vouchers to make it cheaper..."

So I took it that his budget wasn't that high after all and looked at the lower priced items, he was by then looking at necklaces and bracelets costing £000's. Baffled, I asked him again how much he wanted to spend and he said "I told you whatever you want but you obviously don't know what you would like or you would have chosen by now".

I replied that I wasn't about to choose something costing a thousand pounds only for him to say he wanted to spend fifty, and likewise I didn't want to be looking at the cheaper ranges if he really intended to spend a lot more and he said "forget it then. You don't want anything". And walked out of the shop.

Much later he did buy me a necklace but tbh it was too late.

Can you use Tesco vouchers in Goldsmiths?
If you can, the bit in bold actually makes sense to me - and is, of course, very much in the MSE spirit.

If you can't, I would have seen the remark as unnecessarily sarcastic.

Treevo

Dunroamin wrote: »

The forum censorship opens some interesting possibilities as to what you actually said!

:rotfl:

M a f i a.

Though I was almost tempted to leave it as is!

poet123

Pollycat wrote: »

Can you use Tesco vouchers in Goldsmiths?
If you can, the bit in bold actually makes sense to me - and is, of course, very much in the MSE spirit.

If you can't, I would have seen the remark as unnecessarily sarcastic.

Yes, I think you can, change them and get 3 x face value I think but I am no expert.

gt568

Jinx wrote: »

Okay the word 'hint' here is obviously misleading.

I saw the earrings and said I was going in the shop. Had a look round and a chat with the owner. Asked him for a business card so I could give it to hubby (who was in shop with me) to note the earrings for future purchase. The owner was out of cards and he actually said the website is pretty poor - heyho. Hubby noted the shop name and I knew he would ask our daughter to go get the earrings at some point as she works near there. I do it this way so I get what I want in general knowing men find it hard to choose for us women. Daughter always gets sent to collect.

We left the shop and I didn't give it another thought because I don't spend my life expecting my husband to just add to my jewellery collection on every day out.

ETA - I don't play games with my husband - well not head games anyway lol

I am not annoyed I didn't get the earrings.

I am annoyed he brought up the subject at all. If he had wanted to buy me a gift he should have done or not mentioned it. To say oh I thought about it but didn't is just stupid -as I say zero brownie points.

And I would not have asked for the earrings, Im saving for a special holiday and we're having work done on the house - not the time to splash out on luxuries so again, why even mention it?

Fruitloop.