First time post - wwyd and wdyt?

AnnieO1234

Hi all,

Long time reader, occasional commenter but first post so please bear with me

Basically in a few weeks time DH, DS and I have a picnic planned with one of my oldest friends to meet their new partner for the first time - for once she seems like someone who will stick and their future seems like it could be rosey.

However she's got a list of (I am told) allergies which I am happy to accommodate for the food but the more I have tried to plan the more it feels like she's fussy not allergic. And more importantly I am also thinking that were it me with the allergies etc I would take my own food and drink to not inconvenience the other person.

What do you all think of this?

Peanut allergy but doesn't bother to read packaging ever.
Egg allergy - can't have cakes or quiche but can have mayonnaise?!
Sulphites - basically can only drink fresh chiller or home made fruit juice or water, all sodas etc are off limits. But it's okay in sandwich meats even though according to allergy charities it's carte Blanche if you're sensitive.
Processed food like pastas and white bread are off limits too.

Am I just being sensitive or is this a fussy eater trying to make everyone jump for her????

Thanks in advance!

Ax

go_cat

It depends how serious these allergies are. The most serious being the nut one which in serious cases can cause anaphylactic shock.

Even nut traces can set this off so if she is severely nut allergic you need to be careful

Why don't you say you are struggling to find bits for her to eat and she can recommend some items, that way you are taking the lead from her.

Having said all this is sounds a bit like she thinks that some foods maybe don't suit her body and so she excludes them

Edit allergies and intolerances are completely different things


Good luck

burnoutbabe

Just let her bring her share of the picnic?

(is the new girfriend the fussy one or the friend)

It just seems simplest to say "I'm worried I'll get it wrong so best you bring stuff you like and know you can eat"

Annisele

I think I'd go for "I'm really sorry, but I'd never forgive myself if anything happened to your partner - so this time I think it'd be best if you brought the food."

The only thing I can think of that I would dare feed the woman is raw peeled fruit. You can end up with sulphites in pretty much anything that's been processed - either as an ingredient, or used somewhere along the packaging process. I'm sure there's more than that she can eat, but I'd expect somebody with that list to have a pretty good idea of what that is - and I'd also expect them to share what they can eat, not just what they can't.

I suppose it's possible to have a reaction to something that's in cooked egg but not in raw eggs, thought it seems very unlikely.

Person_one

It doesn't really matter if she's actually just fussy. You've been told she's allergic so you have to take that seriously, the consequences if you decide to make your own diagnosis could be tragic. Either take safe food or ask her to bring her own.

It does really bother me when fussy people claim allergies though, because this is the result. People start disbelieving which is very dangerous for the genuine cases.

bagpussbear

I would ask your friend to either bring her own food as you're scared you might pick something that doesn't agree, or get her to tell you exactly what she does want/can eat.

Or just say you'll bring meats, cheeses, and salad and she can bring along things that she is able to eat with that sort of thing?

neverdespairgirl

Person_one wrote: »

It does really bother me when fussy people claim allergies though, because this is the result. People start disbelieving which is very dangerous for the genuine cases.

My sister's suffered from that - she's not allergic to anything, but she's a Coeliac.

She'd far, far rather bring her own grub, then she knows it's safe. People who insist on catering and take offence worry her, as she's then not absolutely sure.

neverdespairgirl

Annisele wrote: »

I think I'd go for "I'm really sorry, but I'd never forgive myself if anything happened to your partner - so this time I think it'd be best if you brought the food."

That's a great line to take - go for it. Couldn't possibly offend, and would probably be safer anyway.

sassyblue

Well she can't have a serious peanut allergy if she doesn't read packaging as lost of things are made in factories where nuts are. :eek:

I'd do as a annisele says and let them do their food and you do yours, you can always share.

AnnieO1234

That's sort of my point and why I am getting annoyed. If you really had all that list, and like has been said you could die, you would bring your own stuff surely??? It feels like a power trip.

Yes it's the new girlfriend xx

*max*

I get WWYD, but what does WDYT mean?

Edit: just got it as I was posting...d'oh.