Bullying

wheezy57

I was suspended a few months ago and posted on here all the ins and outs of what had happened to me. After a rather silly and unnecessary investigation (two months) I was allowed back to my job but in another department. The new job is stressful but I am getting there and I am just about holding it together.

Because of what happened to me I have been very deeply affected by the actions of one or two bullies who were hell bent on getting me sacked.

On Friday I heard two pieces of gossip that kicked me in the stomach. The manager who had had me suspended is still bullying me even though I am not in her department anymore. She has reported me for something so petty that I couldnt exactly comprehend it at first to my new line manager. She wanted to escalate the situation and felt duty bound to report me - this time in front of reliable witnesses. She has been interfering, poking her nose in, strutting (as only a carbon copy of Miss Trunchball can) and smirking whenever she sees me. When my new line manager mentioned it I couldnt believe what I heard but it was fine and I forgot about it. It was Friday when I heard what she had done and how she was involved.

I have now been to HR 5 times to get some help about this womens bullying. 5 times I have been ignored. Now, I am going to go down the Formal Grievance route. I have been to HR (again) and I have to do yet another statement (the first one I did was rubbished by the investigator as a pack of lies).

I was so upset that I couldnt concentrate, I just couldnt focus on my work and was duly sent home. This woman is using overt use of power and would appear to be still grinding her axe about me. I cannot tell you in words what it like to be in this situation. Once again, my life is now on hold again (although I am still working thankfully) and I have to go through the due process all over again because they closed ranks before and made me suffer and basically threw it out due to lack of proof.(against me, not for anything in my defence which was the truth)

I am seeing a counsellor as well due to the effect that her behaviour is having on me mentally and physically and he said I was like a volcano ready to erupt. He used words like brutal, rage, anger, and severe pain over what had happened to me. And now this.

I am so very very upset, but at the same time my new department are absolutely wonderful. Breath of fresh air and I am not walking about with so many daggers in my back - only the one that I know of.

I am wondering what will become of me for once again being a thorn in the organisations side. I wonder if it will all blow over again and this woman will be allowed to continue her hate campaign against me. This gratuitous negativity towards me is slowly and surely ruining me.

I am not optimistic at all, but I feel that it is the only course of action I can do to get her to just bloudy well stop. I have to be seen to follow procedure at all times otherwise it will just get chucked out and be a blot on my record. But they do not have to have to do anything (except follow the law) and I suspect that the worse will happen.

I am so tired of it all. So is my family. Thanks for listening.

Southend1

I know how awful you must be feeling, I've been through it myself.

Counselling helped me a lot.

Are you in a union? If not, join first thing on Monday. They will be able to support and advise you.

Be wary of HR. They aren't there to help you, they work for the company. Often it's easier to remove the complainer rather than the problem itself.

Good luck!

gibson123

Stop doing the same thing hoping for a different result. Rather than talk about bullying start talking about your health and safety and the employers duties towards you, this is making you ill, the employer has to take action. is there a health and safety advisor in your organisation, if there is have a word. see this link

http://www.hse.gov.uk/stress/furtheradvice/legalresponsibility.htm

ohreally

wheezy57 wrote: »

I have now been to HR 5 times to get some help about this womens bullying. 5 times I have been ignored.

Wheezy, you appear to be failing to grasp the function of HR. They exist to protect the employers back, not take on your fights for you.

Based on information on previous posts, I would not be surprised if your grievence fails.
You need to pick your battles, for the sake of your sanity and health try and let go of past issues and keep your head down, at least until the dust settles.

ILW

Sorry, but have you wondered why you seem to atract this sort of behaviour?

Southend1

ILW wrote: »

Sorry, but have you wondered why you seem to atract this sort of behaviour?

Bullies usually select their victims because they are successful/attractive/strong/rich etc

They believe they are deficient in certain areas and have learned to make themselves feel better by attacking someone they perceive as better than themselves in some way

flashnazia

Southend1 wrote: »

Bullies usually select their victims because they are successful/attractive/strong/rich etc

They believe they are deficient in certain areas and have learned to make themselves feel better by attacking someone they perceive as better than themselves in some way

Not always.

Sometime people become 'bullies' in response to being bullied first. Not saying that is what is happening here but pointing out that many so called 'bullying' cases are not usually straightforward.

Southend1

flashnazia wrote: »

Not always.

Sometime people become 'bullies' in response to being bullied first. Not saying that is what is happening here but pointing out that many so called 'bullying' cases are not usually straightforward.

True but it sounds like OP is just minding own business in new department

falko89

Southend1 wrote: »

Bullies usually select their victims because they are successful/attractive/strong/rich etc

They believe they are deficient in certain areas and have learned to make themselves feel better by attacking someone they perceive as better than themselves in some way

Hmm, I beg to differ, I am probably the opposite of successful/attractive/strong/rich and have went through this carp, I think some people just give out a vibe or something that attracts it.

wheezy57

ILW wrote: »

Sorry, but have you wondered why you seem to atract this sort of behaviour?

Ive asked myself this same question over and over again. Still cant come up with an answer. Only that this person seems hell bent on ruining my life.

I dont believe I have 'attracted any sort of behaviour' at all. Why turn it round so its my fault that I am being bullied.

wheezy57

ohreally wrote: »

Wheezy, you appear to be failing to grasp the function of HR. They exist to protect the employers back, not take on your fights for you.

Based on information on previous posts, I would not be surprised if your grievence fails.
You need to pick your battles, for the sake of your sanity and health try and let go of past issues and keep your head down, at least until the dust settles.

Thank you for that. I have to follow procedure though and the first point of call in 5 times is to report these activities to HR. If, supposedly I went down a different route ie the press then I would have been pulled for not following their procedures. I cant win. And I dont expect to 'win'. I just want this woman to stop. Full stop. No more hiding behind corners, no more malicious rumours, no more inveigling other members of staff to do me down. Thats all. If it means going to the correct department first then thats what I have to do. If, though this still goes tuts up then I shall go down other roads. Not for ultimate air punching result, but for her to be made to stop.