Bullying

Orville

flashnazia wrote: »

I don't think I have been 'toxic', just pragmatic.

If you think pragmatism = bullying then I'm starting to see signs of persecution complex maybe?

What are you hoping to achieve with this grievance?

You get worse as you post..

Orville

Funky_Bold_Ribena wrote: »

The best thing to do would be to give us some detail on the actual things she is doing, so that you can get help to back up your complaint and perhaps to out wit her.

Otherwise all that is happening here is that you are moaning about a bully and people respond with varying degrees of 'what are you trying to achieve in all this'...

Agreed, give some more info wheezy. If your scared of your employer reading this, then make up a scenario along the same lines as what is happening to you without being too direct..

Failing that you can pm.. :-)

ILW

Orville wrote: »

Agreed, give some more info wheezy. If your scared of your employer reading this, then make up a scenario along the same lines as what is happening to you without being too direct..

Failing that you can pm.. :-)

So far seems to have been the odd comment or "funny" look.

Orville

Daedalus wrote: »

You might be, but most rational people don't tend to take one side of the story as gospel. If that upsets you then you are kind of proving the 'May be you are too sensitive' brigade right...

I don't think so. She is probably worried that if she gives the exact info a colleague could well read this and put 2 & 2 together and work it out.

Saying someone is sensitive is all too easy. That is a cop out TBH, that alot of people who DO the bullying say and an excuse that management who aren't strong enough to deal with the situation use.

Dogger69

Orville wrote: »

That is the attitude that bullies hope for. Why should she leave her job because of someones actions..? The person who is causing the trouble should go.

The trouble with alot (most, if not all) workplaces is that people become too friendly. The friendship reaches a point where people don't do their job properly and they become biased. Because manager A goes out with HR lady, or Personel guy, or manager B, when it comes to a complaint against them they close ranks so as not to spoil friendships etc. They can't remain objective and unbiased.

I suspect if people acted in a proper professional manner then this bullying would have been dealt with a long time ago.

Yes, there are some situations that you are never going to win, and when this happens you are best to find an alternative course of action, which may be changing jobs.

What benefit is there to pursuing something that is never going to have a positive outcome?

Orville wrote: »

As has been said she did just that. It is the manager in her old department who keeps it going. It's the manager who can't let go.

Is it? No one else in the company seems to agree with this ...

Orville

ILW wrote: »

So far seems to have been the odd comment or "funny" look.

So if you were for instance a bit overweight and people started to call you fatty or lardy or something like that. They also gave you a nasty look or turned their faces at you. Do you not think that is a form of bullying..?

Say you were gay and someone called you a shirt lifter all the time and went round sniggering with people. Is that a form of bullying..?

It's like what goes on in the playground etc with children, name calling face pulling, while it may not seem too much for you, if your on the receiving end it can mean much more.

Orville

Dogger69 wrote: »

Yes, there are some situations that you are never going to win, and when this happens you are best to find an alternative course of action, which may be changing jobs.

What benefit is there to pursuing something that is never going to have a positive outcome?



Is it? No one else in the company seems to agree with this ...

I don't think anyone through no fault of their own should have to look for another job. If you think they should, i am glad your not my boss.

The benefit of perusing this is to work towards a time where this never happens in the workplace.

No-body would, would they as they have found in the managers favor before. You need to look at the wider picture.

Managers will very rarely uphold complaints against each other. I can tell you this for a fact as i work in a large supermarket and while one guy did something which was sack-able and he got just that, a manager did just the same and was not sacked, in-fact just a verbal warning. Any incident like wheezy's should be investigated by someone outside of the immediate workplace as they are not going to have a conflict of interest. (If it's possible).

I don't TBH think there will ever be any neutrality within the workplace where complaints are concerned. What would the answer be?. i Don't know but i don't ever think anyone should lie down and let them get on with it.

Dogger69

Orville wrote: »

I don't think anyone through no fault of their own should have to look for another job. If you think they should, i am glad your not my boss.

The benefit of perusing this is to work towards a time where this never happens in the workplace.

No-body would, would they as they have found in the managers favor before. You need to look at the wider picture.

The wider picture is that no one at work believes the OP. That is not going to change simply because she makes repeat complaints.

How long should you pursue something that you are never going to win? Taking your stance, a year from now the OP will probably have had a nervous breakdown. Or they could make a break and be happy in a new job. Which is the better outcome?

ILW

Orville wrote: »

Agreed, give some more info wheezy. If your scared of your employer reading this, then make up a scenario along the same lines as what is happening to you without being too direct..

Failing that you can pm.. :-)

Orville wrote: »

So if you were for instance a bit overweight and people started to call you fatty or lardy or something like that. They also gave you a nasty look or turned their faces at you. Do you not think that is a form of bullying..?

Say you were gay and someone called you a shirt lifter all the time and went round sniggering with people. Is that a form of bullying..?

It's like what goes on in the playground etc with children, name calling face pulling, while it may not seem too much for you, if your on the receiving end it can mean much more.

People tried in the past, you need to stand up to them one way or another. Sorry but life is like a school playground.

Orville

ILW wrote: »

People tried in the past, you need to stand up to them one way or another. Sorry but life is like a school playground.

Yes it is like a school playground and why that can be a very good memory for some, for others it can scar them for life.:(