children in communal changing rooms

MrsE_2

I go swimming at least once a week. I go to a swimming class on a thursday evening (7.30 pm).
There is often a lady (last week she was with a friend) & she has her son, this week the friend also had a son & they all use the female communal changing room.
The boys are about 7/8, at a guess. They also use the communal shower in the ladies.
The upper age for opposite sex use of the changing room is 8, this seems very old to me, to be exposed to unknown naked ladies & for those ladies to be stripping off in front of.
I wouldnt be nearly so annoyed about it except that our swimming baths has at least 6 (maybe more) family changing rooms, with showers in them.
Sometimes you may have to wait a few minutes for these to become available, but Thursday at 7.30 doesnt have lots of children so you probably wouldn't wait too long
Not only does the mother(s) bring their sons in their, they make no effort to hurry up, they often hang about with the boys just chatting.
Last week I decided to tell her I find it inappropriate from both my pov & for the boys. She said he was too young for the mens on his own & there wasnt usually naked women he didnt know in the changing room!!!! Thursday night is swim club night so there are lots of women in & out. I told her she should use the family facilties.

What age do you think is too old for a boy to be in the female changing room?
I think the presence of dedicated family facilities means there is no excuse for any boy older than a toddler to be in there.

Fire_Fox

Ask the centre manager what their policy is, and for notices to be put up to that effect - it's irrelevant what we think tho 8 seems old IF there are females who feel uncomfortable. This is more likely in a multicultural area.

Pigeongirl

I don't think eight is too old at all and it wouldn't bother me.

pigpen

It is 10 here!!!

Maybe you should use the family changing facilities if you are upset by their presence.

MrsE_2

Fire_Fox wrote: »

Ask the centre manager what their policy is, and for notices to be put up to that effect - it's irrelevant what we think tho 8 seems old IF there are females who feel uncomfortable. This is more likely in a multicultural area.

I did ask them, thats how I know its 8.
Its not really a multicultural area, but I still think 8 is too old.
Especially as their are private family changing rooms, they even have showers in them.

BitterAndTwisted

It's whatever the children's mothers think is appropriate. If I was a mother I certainly wouldn't want 7 or 8 year olds using the men's changing room on their own.

Of course, if we were Scandinavians or Germans we wouldn't be having this conversation. Even grannys get completely stripped off at the beach in those countries and no-one takes any notice, and I've never heard of kids being scarred for life about it.

MrsE_2

pigpen wrote: »

It is 10 here!!!

Maybe you should use the family changing facilities if you are upset by their presence.

Do you think its appropriate for a 10 year old to be changing & showering with naked female strangers?
It would feel selfish to take a family room for myself, but I guess its the answer.

marisco_2

I take my sons aged 10 and 7 swimming regularly. As at your pool OP, my local one has family changing areas. I always used these as it gave myself and the boys some privacy and also didn't make other swimmers feel uncomfy about their presence.

My eldest now likes to go and change in the male changing rooms. I trust him to do this. He has a strong pair of lungs on him and would call out for help if any problem arose. The youngest doesn't feel ready to do this just yet and still likes to come in with me, as he is lazy and expects me to dry him. Thankfully they have installed one of those machines that you stand in and get blown dry in moments which he loves. Saves me time so win, win

When they were really little I dont think people would have minded so much if we had all been in the main female changing area. However I respect that as they are so much older now and more aware it isn't really appropriate. It is all about having an awareness of how your actions make others feel and adjusting what you do to show some consideration to them really isn't it.

mrcow

If you're bothered by it, then use the private changing rooms that you have said are availabe.

Problem solved.

memoryoftrees

If there are family communal changing rooms then there is no reason whatsoever why the mothers cannot use these with their children. I'd speak to the manager about it I think.

MrsE_2

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

It's whatever the children's mothers think is appropriate. If I was a mother I certainly wouldn't want 7 or 8 year olds using the men's changing room on their own.

Of course, if we were Scandinavians or Germans we wouldn't be having this conversation. Even grannys get completely stripped off at the beach in those countries and no-one takes any notice, and I've never heard of kids being scarred for life about it.

Actually I disagree, I'm also a user & I feel its inappropriate for me to be stripping naked in front of 8 year old boys.
Totally agree about using the mens, thats why they have family rooms.