Separated, how much should I provide?

harz99

That's all good news Jack. Small steps but all in the right direction. Fingers crossed (and everything else) that it all happens as per plan.

sidefx

Any news Jack?

JackRS

sidefx wrote: »

Any news Jack?

Thanks for asking, not so much but I'll give an update.

Settlement order:
ex has approve order that her solicitor has created, she had to sign and post back a 'statement of information' before they could send it to mine. She posted it last Thursday so the order should be with mine I'd hope by today but not heard yet.

Solicitor bill:
Yes I got another one for the 2 weeks of June that was basically emails and the phone call about the agreed settlement that came to £480, so I'm guessing there shouldn't be much more to do as her estimate was £750 for the remaining work!

Complaint letter:
I have 11 examples documents which vary between 1 and 8 pages each as I've copied in all the relevant emails and documents. I'm not sending in just yet as there will no doubt be some additional examples in the next few weeks.

Son got a apprentice position
Not sure with who or what , he was looking at banks. I heard on the grapevine? I'm really pleased for him but obviously he doesn't wish to share it with me so I can't really tell him. Actually I was going to send him a card (in the post) to congratulate him.

House purchase
That's all gone a bit slow chasing the sellers solicitors for contracts at the moment but end of July move in is looking less likely which is a shame as I have a week off work (compulsory shutdown) at the end of July and wanted to move in. I'm just looking into house insurance as that needs to be in place when the money exchanges.....

Ex's car
She collects her new one tomorrow. We had a bit of text debate as the latest time they let her change is 4pm which caused her a problem with work. I did congratulate her on getting a job but she didn't respond, as predicted. She's managed to arrange to leave work early but appreciate it's not ideal when you've not been there long but she's got 6 weeks holiday coming up.

Rental eviction hearing 9th July
I suspect I will have to get out soon but hopefully I can link it to the move timing. Now I need to start being ruthless with the little bits of junk I've brought with me, so I need to take some stuff to the tip, put some clothes in charity bags (I get about 5 a week) and box some stuff to take.

Fathers day
Got a card and gift from my daughter which was lovely, but as expected nothing from my son.

Think that's about it?

ampersand

Some good things there, Jack, even if interred to some degree.

Try to freecycle before dump? You'd be surprised...

Thankyou for the update. It can feel intrusive posting nomb politesses.

kelpie35

So pleased you received a card and gift from your daughter, I'm sure that must have warmed your heart.

I would send a card to your son, it shows you are the bigger person and also that he knows he is in your thoughts. Don't expect it to change how he feels at the moment. I have faith to believe that it will come in time.

Another thing you might like to think about, is that when you move into your new pad, just drop him a line with your new address and an invite to visit, call or write to you. Then it is a matter of time till he responds. Hopefully very soon.

Hope that the time passes quickly for you till you are settled.

That light is getting even closer.

Take care

sidefx

Thank you for the update Jack.

It seems that the end is in sight for you at long long last.

So lovely you got a card and present from your daughter.

I would definitely send your son a congratulations and good luck card for getting an apprenticeship. Even if it isn't acknowledged your son will be reminded that you are there and you care for him even if from afar.

justme111

I do not know what I would if my grown up child refused contact as I have not been in that situation. Trying to imagine it - may be a year or a few years down the line I would have written him that I my life is badly affected by this rift and that I cried on many occasions due to it , that my life is not going to be good until we reconnect - not being worried that I will appear weak in doing it and ask him to get in touch.

Angry_Bear

justme111 wrote: »

I do not know what I would if my grown up child refused contact as I have not been in that situation. Trying to imagine it - may be a year or a few years down the line I would have written him that I my life is badly affected by this rift and that I cried on many occasions due to it , that my life is not going to be good until we reconnect - not being worried that I will appear weak in doing it and ask him to get in touch.

Just my 0.02, but there is no way I'd do this. It might not be the way you meant it to come across, but that sounds incredibly emotionally-blackmailing (you've ruined my life, get in touch or my life will stay ruined). Sounds very selfish.
If anything, "I love you, I miss you, I'm sorry things turned out the way they have. Please get in touch, you're always welcome."

justme111

It would be just stating the facts. As "i love you i miss you " are quite cursory words , they do not give him information to which extent it affects the father. And if son does not know to which extent it affect father then son will not have all the information relevant to his decisions. From my experience people often chose to "play it cool" with minimal emotions manifested which is often misleading to ones on the receiving end and results in crossed wires.

JackRS

...Well I put a congratulations card in the post today to him