Separated, how much should I provide?

JackRS

Wol2 wrote: »

Spousal maintenance should cover "all living costs" - yet despite agreeing to cover an (albeit negotiable) monthly sum for SM, for (an albeit negotiable) number of years ......you are also being asked to contribute an additional £185pcm for a car....:eek:

I honestly don;t think your barrister or the judge has twigged this "duplication of demand" yet..

Thanks for answering my question about monthly car payments - it's late now so I will PM my suggestion to you you tomorrow
xxx

Thanks for your views, it is complex and frustrating, believe me...
I believe the car is something of a unique privilege that is available to me. This is something I can provide at a lower cost than available to most. If I wasn't able to provide the car I would be expected to pay more maintenance and cash. As I wrote previously my barrister believed a judge may order SM around the £950/m therefore providing a car gives me an advantage in terms of lower total payment. It gives her an advantage compared to needing to buy a car and insurance etc. Obviously if the car wasn't a factor I wouldn't include it. I'm trying to maximise what I get in terms of cash to improve my LTV.

duchy

I think the car is been treated as an entitlement on top rather than a substitute.

I think removing it would give you a bargaining tool.

mgdavid

duchy wrote: »

I think the car is been treated as an entitlement on top rather than a substitute.

I think removing it would give you a bargaining tool.

No; I think the opposite.
It is being offered as a bargaining tool, to reduce the OP's cash outflow, as it is worth more to the ex than it actually costs our OP.

wannabe_credit_free

This is the longest drawn out affair, I have ever come across. I sincerely hope that you Jack and Mrs ex Jack can reach a fair outcome and move on with your respective lives and be happy...life is too short as it is...

Marisco

JackRS wrote: »

Thanks for your views, it is complex and frustrating, believe me...
I believe the car is something of a unique privilege that is available to me. This is something I can provide at a lower cost than available to most. If I wasn't able to provide the car I would be expected to pay more maintenance and cash. As I wrote previously my barrister believed a judge may order SM around the £950/m therefore providing a car gives me an advantage in terms of lower total payment. It gives her an advantage compared to needing to buy a car and insurance etc. Obviously if the car wasn't a factor I wouldn't include it. I'm trying to maximise what I get in terms of cash to improve my LTV.

But why? Isn't it about time she stood on her own two feet? Let her buy her own car, that's what I did when my marriage went south, it didn't even occur to me to expect my ex to shell out for one. God, what a leech! :mad:

kelpie35

My final offer as posted earlier was £210k, no pension share £650/m and car for 3 years. Or no car and £215k. To which she couldn't agree and felt under pressure so wanted time to consider. My barrister suggested we put the offer in writing then she has 14 days to respond. If no agreement then final hearing which will be 3 - 6 months away and cost between £10k - £20k. My barrister said if it went to final hearing and the outcome was similar to the offer I could claim costs against her.




If this offer is refused, and it does take another few months:mad:

Your csa payments and car lease will have finished, what will she do then?

Are you forced, by law, to pay her anything until a judge decides at a final hearing what amount you have to pay?

JackRS

mgdavid wrote: »

No; I think the opposite.
It is being offered as a bargaining tool, to reduce the OP's cash outflow, as it is worth more to the ex than it actually costs our OP.

Yes that's how the barrister saw it when discussing although indicated the judge would see it as a total cost to me not its value. In the negotiations one option she suggested was for capital now she would go without the car, she wanted £220k with no car and 4 years SM at £650/m in response to my final offer of £210k and 3 years SM at £650/m and car for 3 years.

JackRS

Marisco wrote: »

But why? Isn't it about time she stood on her own two feet? Let her buy her own car, that's what I did when my marriage went south, it didn't even occur to me to expect my ex to shell out for one. God, what a leech! :mad:

Yes you'd think so but the guidelines the judge gave were, because she is unlikely to earn much more than the minimum wage and her pension pot is small that a clean break may not be appropriate in this case. The judge said if she was reviewing this at a final hearing she would suggest a lower portion of available cash, a pension share and SM until retirement.....

However at no point has ex requested pension share, she's wanted cash to maximise her house purchase fund.

harrys_nan

I fail to see, why you are still having to give her SM. Is she old or unable to work ( I know she just doesn't want to) I thought SM went by the wayside years ago. I appreciate she lived a certain lifestyle with you but come on, how much longer are you going to be tied to her?
I understand perhaps she has to have a certain amount of help to start a fresh, but nothing is stopping her from working and claiming if she won't/can't work full time, so why are you having to support her for x amount of years, if it was 12 months or so I could.
Can't understand some women at all.

JackRS

kelpie35 wrote: »

My final offer as posted earlier was £210k, no pension share £650/m and car for 3 years. Or no car and £215k. To which she couldn't agree and felt under pressure so wanted time to consider. My barrister suggested we put the offer in writing then she has 14 days to respond. If no agreement then final hearing which will be 3 - 6 months away and cost between £10k - £20k. My barrister said if it went to final hearing and the outcome was similar to the offer I could claim costs against her.




If this offer is refused, and it does take another few months:mad:

Your csa payments and car lease will have finished, what will she do then?

Are you forced, by law, to pay her anything until a judge decides at a final hearing what amount you have to pay?

No I would not be required by law unless a maintenance pending suite (sorry if wrong spelling?) hearing was held and an order passed. Obviously these take time and costs high so it would not be likely to be held before a final divorce hearing.