Separated, how much should I provide?

kelpie35

that is a step in the right direction Jack, I hope the paper work from your ex does not make any delays for you as I do not know how these thing work.

Keep strong

quidsy

Your solicitor I assume means January 2015 not 2014

JackRS

quidsy wrote: »

Your solicitor I assume means January 2015 not 2014

yeah she also managed to get the name wrong in the email, I pointed these out in a reply plus some other aspects relating to costs and efficiency etc, her reply below:

My apologies! I did mean ex Mrs JackRS – don’t worry, you don’t have a bigamous marriage to Joy!

If you can get together as much of the information as you can, and present it to me in n organised format, then that will indeed help you to reduce your costs. Unfortunately, updating financial information is not ‘optional’ but is a requirement of the court prior to an FDR hearing, and that is especially relevant given the time that has elapsed between the preparation of the Form E and the date of the next court hearing.

Let me reassure you that I am as mindful of keeping your costs limited as you are. That said, she has changed solicitor, and I have had a preliminary chat with her new solicitor, who appears to be very reasonable, and I am hopeful that real progress can be made in discussions between us.

Ames

I think I heard ex Mrs.RS's scream from here!

Well done for being strong, stick to it.

ampersand

Good email to ex, Jack. Another time, 'the former marital home' rather than 'our home'?-says &, not with wooden spoon. I actually think it's sensible to emphasise this onward move in your thinking, if not hers. You did in #1905.
Anyway, that's minuscule.

Had you wind of her change of solicitor ? reason? I hope dealings with this new lot are stronger and more realistic....which ex won't like, I dare say.

One can only speculate who initiated this shift. Is it possible she was advised she was being unreasonable, even that prolongation and fees to Jack diminished pot?...as my late mother would say, 'cutting off her nose to spite her face'?
#
'"Andrew is extremely diligent. His preparation and written work is first-class, and he is tenacious and determined, with a real attention to detail." "He has a good, clear and concise manner with clients and a very tenacious demeanour in court."'[/I]

We all hope for this. Mr Day writes up well, notwithstanding in-house source/purpose.
#
He tweeted this case:
http://www.bailii.org/ew/cases/EWHC/Fam/2014/2263.html
[heard on Independence Day, I note]

Interesting reading: ex-wife as petitioner, used to working/minded to work, pre-school twins, reasonable cause, sensibly judged.

2 other names in those Chambers are known to me in a good way.

Are you feeling better on basis of his resum!? When might you meet him and get a real reading?

Tomorrow's focus must also be your [temporary]new roof, which returns us to RAS's #1906.

It's been a beautiful day here today. I hope you've felt some of it by being outside and also by gleaning something hopeful in reading about Andrew Day.

'Andrew Day is very able and very good at pushing difficult or unpopular points.' and
'Andrew is proud to have won praise for his diligence and tenacity. He also recognises the key importance of frank, pragmatic advice and of client care. He works hard to achieve an advantageous negotiated settlement as swiftly, amicably and inexpensively as possible, wherever appropriate, but will not shy away from a heavily contested final hearing, if one is required to achieve the right result for his client.'

Gives me heart - you, too, I hope.
Will he know of this Thread?

GobbledyGook

Make sure you keep on top of everything Jack. You don't want the excuse of a new solicitor needing time to delay everything more.

Also as well as looking into your Mr Day it might be worth having a look at her new solicitors to see who she has gone with now (although probs best don't post it here, that would be too identifying.)

JackRS

The reason she changed solicitors is because her previous one retired. The new one is from the same firm and based on opinions offered at mediation is actually of similar mind set. I do feel that both solicitors seem to want to make the most of any case to generate income. I try hard not to contact mine as it generates cost to me with no real value. Today arrive home to find this month’s bill from my solicitor for £380. This was for a few emails and 2 phone calls with me adding up to 36 minutes. I will keep all the evidence and make a complaint at the end.

In terms of Andy the barrister reading the thread at his daily rate I hope he doesn't! I’ve lost a lot of faith in the process and the people who work in it. We all know that the legal people are the only winners in these cases.

ampersand

Fair enough.

Bonfire77

To be fair, the fact that she is still living in the former FH is a huge contributing factor to her not moving on and wondering why she can't live the like the good old days. It's hard for a woman when her young ones grow up and leave home and don't need her anymore, so there is that as well. She is still in her own kitchen, but has no one to cook for! Every time she cooks a meal she remembers how you all used to sit around that table together, every time she soaks in the bath she looks around that bathroom and dwells on the fact that she never used to pay her own water bills so why now? As she goes to sleep in the bed you both used to share she softly sings to herself, "those were the days...."

Clearly Madam Leech is just not very bright (why is that rich spoiled girls are generally lazy and dumb?) and is allowing herself to constantly be faced with her past. Personally I think the best thing you could do for her and for you is to help her get out of the FH and off to the south.

I would like to offer the positive angle to renting. I know everyone else has advised you against it Jack, but there is also the other side! It could be a good viable reason to get her out of that house so she can move on, be closer to Mum and Dad, get a job in the south like she says she is gonna do (yeah right...magic...!!!!!!!), be closer to son, etc.

There are such things as good tenants!! There are many, many good folks that rent every day and care for homes as if they were their own...not all of us can afford mortgages! And plenty of times L.L's have given notice to their tenants of the home being sold. I know so many cases of Land Lords keeping tenants for a 3 or 6 month contract while the house is waiting to be sold! But then when it's bought the renters simply move on. Its a contract. Simple.

In fact, you could have one of the rooms for yourself in your own home and rent out the other rooms or parts of the house! It might be sold if you were there in that house trying to sell it. And then at the same time you and the Ex would be making some money off of the house. Right now it's not being sold and not making any money!!

As we all know -- a happy X is just a huge weight off of the shoulders! We don't have to live with our former husbands or wives, but when they are not happy and are constantly still "in our lives" (whether through email or phone calls or nagging or needs etc etc) because of their complaining --- it's just hell. Let her be happy in the south so she can stop sucking the life out of you.... even if it means sacrificing some more money for now. It will be better in the future for you if that house gets sold! Sacrifice now so she can just go live near Mom and Dad and you can sort of wash your hands of it. This will also filter down to daughter as Mum will be happier, making daughter feel better about Mum.

I know I'm rambling, I'm sorry... I'm off on a tandem! ha! I just feel very strongly that your ex wife needs to move out of that house as it's one of your biggest financial assets and its bringing you both nothing, it's just losing value. You need a place to live as well... so till it gets sold you could live there and rent it and try to sell it. Land Lords who rent often get very good results and it's a good source of income.

quidsy

Clearly Madam Leech is just not very bright (why is that rich spoiled girls are generally lazy and dumb?)

wow, really?