Separated, how much should I provide?

Caroline_a

To be honest, Jack, if by any fluke the courts award her all this, I'd be taking any equity you get from the house and going off on a world cruise. Take a sabbatical, give up your job, work in a bar in the South Seas.... I would never have thought I would give this advice to anyone who is trying to work out a settlement, but that is all she deserves. Gaaah!!

SandC

I've been keeping up with this on and off over the time it's been here.

Jack, lifetime maintenance is the sort of thing that gets awarded when one party is, quite frankly, loaded! This just doesn't happen with your ordinary average family!

I actually hope it does get to court because it seems only a court order is ever going to work favourably in your direction as all this stuff is getting nowhere fast.

Remember her solicitor is trying to get the maximum for your ex wife. My friend was in a situation whereby on her divorce her solicitor was asking for far more than she required or felt she deserved but she'd been advised it was always a starting point and it's a bit of a game of back and forwards bargaining.

She is probably not being advised that she is entitled to all this stuff, but she's trying for it anyway.

JackRS

Caroline_a wrote: »

To be honest, Jack, if by any fluke the courts award her all this, I'd be taking any equity you get from the house and going off on a world cruise. Take a sabbatical, give up your job, work in a bar in the South Seas.... I would never have thought I would give this advice to anyone who is trying to work out a settlement, but that is all she deserves. Gaaah!!

Yeah someone said to me maybe worth getting early retirement...

suze200

JackRS wrote: »

Yeah someone said to me maybe worth getting early retirement...

make sure you keep your pension in the settlement then! Otherwise madam will be getting 50% of that too.

**Patty**

Ayup Jack

Mortgage capability: Yes, short term....you are a better bet for any lender. However.....How much would this be diminished by any Spousal Maintenance you may have to pay?

If the aim of the game is that no party is worse off than the other.....then where is your mortgage-free house coming from? Would you be able to find a lender that would give you a large mortgage over a short term with minimal deposit? Did you get a mortgage projection with this in mind?

I'd lay odds that one of the reasons she hasn't got a job yet, is so that her earnings cannot be used to offset any SM she thinks you should pay. IF you are going to be equal then surely if she has no mortgage + SM + part time wages = her income........then yours should match that in ££££s. Remove the pt wages and she hoovers up more of your salary to make it *equal*......does that make sense?

I'd also bet that she hasn't claimed JSA as she would have to *be actively seeking employment* in order to qualify. Which it seems she has no intention of. ESA would require her to have the support & paperwork from a GP. Same outcome.


Dude....she thought she had it cushty for life......and she's not liking the look of the Real World. Well this ain't Disney and she's no princess.

ecgirl07

She is 51 and looking to retire! Tell her her retirment age is 67 giving her 16years of a working life. She could at least take a small 10year mortgage. You could kindly advise she has wasted 18months of opportunity to provide for her own future...

JackRS

**Patty** wrote: »

Ayup Jack

Mortgage capability: Yes, short term....you are a better bet for any lender. However.....How much would this be diminished by any Spousal Maintenance you may have to pay?

If the aim of the game is that no party is worse off than the other.....then where is your mortgage-free house coming from? Would you be able to find a lender that would give you a large mortgage over a short term with minimal deposit? Did you get a mortgage projection with this in mind?

I'd lay odds that one of the reasons she hasn't got a job yet, is so that her earnings cannot be used to offset any SM she thinks you should pay. IF you are going to be equal then surely if she has no mortgage + SM + part time wages = her income........then yours should match that in ££££s. Remove the pt wages and she hoovers up more of your salary to make it *equal*......does that make sense?

I'd also bet that she hasn't claimed JSA as she would have to *be actively seeking employment* in order to qualify. Which it seems she has no intention of. ESA would require her to have the support & paperwork from a GP. Same outcome.


Dude....she thought she had it cushty for life......and she's not liking the look of the Real World. Well this ain't Disney and she's no princess.

Yes this clearly is the plan and situation, I am very aware of the tactics and plan...and if you and I can see it so could a judge, you'd think?

Yours, Walt....

JackRS

ecgirl07 wrote: »

She is 51 and looking to retire! Tell her her retirment age is 67 giving her 16years of a working life. She could at least take a small 10year mortgage. You could kindly advise she has wasted 18months of opportunity to provide for her own future...

Yes I did mention that a few times, she always says that I only seem to be interested in finding ways for me to pay her less, what awful person that makes me...

justme111

Don't treat her as a sound mind person so you are not going to be offended by her stunts like that. Of course you do look how you could pay her less !!!!!!, its far betterorally than looking how to take most from you !

RAS

"I am not a meal ticket for life."
"I am not a meal ticket for life."
"I am not a meal ticket for life."
"I am not a meal ticket for life."

Repeat ad nausem

If you were run over by a bus, she would have to get her act in gear, unless you have some stonking pension in place. Even then, I doubt she could support her lifestyle long-term.

My mother thought she had a meal-ticket for life. He proved very much otherwise. She did really well despite debts and small children.

What destroyed her was her resentment of the fact that the meal-ticket proved to be an illusion. If she had just gloried in her successes she would have been so much happier and her children might have wanted her company.