Separated, how much should I provide?

Gigervamp

To be honest, she sounds quite controlling and emotionally abusive.

She's saying what she is, because she's losing her control over you and she doesn't like it. She wants you to kowtow to her every demand, so she's trying to make you feel small and worthless so you'll eventually give in to her demands.

I suspect that when you were together, she wore the trousers, so to speak.

But, I see a hint of anger in you Jack! That's good. Get angry. It will help you to stand up to her.
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msb5262

JackRS wrote: »

Thank you for your views. Her argument that she has been fed by her solicitor is due to the length of the marriage, coming up to 28 years, she is entitled and no party should be worse off than the other.

How about the argument that one party through working would be entitled to be better off than the other party? It's not as if she's home looking after the kids; she should be doing something...I'm 48 and about to start a 3 year nursing degree; I'll be qualifying when I'm around your ex's current age and I won't be saying that I need to stay home and do nothing! I totally agree that she is entitled to perhaps 60% of the house value but she should have no further claim on your income. Some solicitors live in la-la land if you ask me.

supersaver2

Flippin heck Jack, I've been following your story and I'm losing my patience so you must be a saint!

Her demands sound quite outrageous to me, surely no court will agree that she needs a house buying outright in an expensive part of the country which is big enough to house your 2 adult children!

Please do keep updating us and I really hope this comes to a fair and swift end, it must be consuming your life.

burnsguitarman

You also have your own future to look to. Hopefully you will meet your soul mate, and maybe even contemplate marriage again, your outgoings and needs then would be completely different from todays.
Your wife is looking after her future, but giving no consideration to yours!

JackRS

msb5262 wrote: »

How about the argument that one party through working would be entitled to be better off than the other party? It's not as if she's home looking after the kids; she should be doing something...I'm 48 and about to start a 3 year nursing degree; I'll be qualifying when I'm around your ex's current age and I won't be saying that I need to stay home and do nothing! I totally agree that she is entitled to perhaps 60% of the house value but she should have no further claim on your income. Some solicitors live in la-la land if you ask me.

Thanks completely agree

JackRS

supersaver2 wrote: »

Flippin heck Jack, I've been following your story and I'm losing my patience so you must be a saint!

Her demands sound quite outrageous to me, surely no court will agree that she needs a house buying outright in an expensive part of the country which is big enough to house your 2 adult children!

Please do keep updating us and I really hope this comes to a fair and swift end, it must be consuming your life.

Thanks, what life it's consumed!

JackRS

burnsguitarman wrote: »

You also have your own future to look to. Hopefully you will meet your soul mate, and maybe even contemplate marriage again, your outgoings and needs then would be completely different from todays.
Your wife is looking after her future, but giving no consideration to yours!

Yes very true

Caroline_a

I wonder how she would react if Jack got himself a new lady and decided to start a new family........

Sorry, just am frustrated that some women in this day and age think that they are entitled anything they ask for! Whatever happened to working?

kelpie35

‘I can’t believe that you’re treating people you once loved so badly, you’re a shadow of the man you were, shirking your responsibilities to your family, I never thought you could be so selfish’.

This is abuse and I have no words to describe how anger this makes me feel.

JackRS

kelpie35 wrote: »

‘I can’t believe that you’re treating people you once loved so badly, you’re a shadow of the man you were, shirking your responsibilities to your family, I never thought you could be so selfish’.

This is abuse and I have no words to describe how anger this makes me feel.

Well it did me, I said if that’s the case you are well rid of me and good luck in finding a better man.