Changing my name - undecided

Lovelyjoolz

notanewuser wrote: »

That's what we've done with our daughter's name.

Fab. How lovely that she has all her history in her name. I hope she carries on the tradition with her children.

Peanut2013

Ill be taking my OHs but mainly because we have a son together who has his daddy's surname and I want the same name too!! Lol.

LO does have my surname as a middle name, which is something we've agreed to do our future kids

Turtle

I'll be changing my mine to my H2B when we get married soon, it's never entered my head not to. I have no idea whether he'd be upset if I didn't want to change it, I've never asked. I'm really looking forward to being Mrs so and so, the only downside is it's the same name as his mother, who some of the time can be a complete pain and totally unreasonable though a lot of the time is fine.

My maiden name is very normal and so is H2B name. If I had a more unique name or if H2B name was horrible then I suppose I might feel differently.

A friend of mine wanted to keep her maiden name, her FIL2B said he wouldn't go to the wedding if she didn't change it to theirs :-( So, she changed it under duress but kept her own name as a middle name as she didn't previously have one.

lisajane8482

I'm not sure what I am going to do yet as I have a daughter from a previous relationship who's surname is the same as mine. We did talk about changing it to OHs but I've already changed her surname once by deed pole (she had her fathers surname but when he decided he didn't want to see her anymore I changed it to mine). I don't like the idea that when she gets married and has to put previous names she would have to list 2, then 3 after she is married. She has a different name to the rest of our family (my mum remarried and I don't see my "biological" fathers family) too. She's not bothered if we have the same name or not as long as the cats still have the same surname as her :rotfl:

Faith177

lisajane8482 wrote: »

I'm not sure what I am going to do yet as I have a daughter from a previous relationship who's surname is the same as mine. We did talk about changing it to OHs but I've already changed her surname once by deed pole (she had her fathers surname but when he decided he didn't want to see her anymore I changed it to mine). I don't like the idea that when she gets married and has to put previous names she would have to list 2, then 3 after she is married. She has a different name to the rest of our family (my mum remarried and I don't see my "biological" fathers family) too. She's not bothered if we have the same name or not as long as the cats still have the same surname as her :rotfl:

Your animals have a double barrled surname lol their registered as my surname-OH's surname but because we have a silly tradition of giving our cats full names one of ours is Princess Sophie Marie Five-Fingered Death Punch (she has extra toes and a mean right hook plus we love the band FFDP) my surname-OH surname. Certainly raised a few eyebrows with the vets when we registered her :eek:

I wouldn't do this to my kids though I want them to be part of a family. I will miss my old name but I see it as a sign of moving forward with my new husband to our new life and I can't wait :j

notanewuser

Faith177 wrote: »

Your animals have a double barrled surname lol their registered as my surname-OH's surname but because we have a silly tradition of giving our cats full names one of ours is Princess Sophie Marie Five-Fingered Death Punch (she has extra toes and a mean right hook plus we love the band FFDP) my surname-OH surname. Certainly raised a few eyebrows with the vets when we registered her :eek:

I wouldn't do this to my kids though I want them to be part of a family. I will miss my old name but I see it as a sign of moving forward with my new husband to our new life and I can't wait :j

Are you implying that my daughter isn't part of a family?!

How strange that you apply such different ideas to children and pets!

Mojisola

Turtle wrote: »

A friend of mine wanted to keep her maiden name, her FIL2B said he wouldn't go to the wedding if she didn't change it to theirs :-( So, she changed it under duress but kept her own name as a middle name as she didn't previously have one.

As you don't change your name until after the ceremony, I would have "changed my mind" about taking on my husband's family name afterwards.

Faith177

notanewuser wrote: »

Are you implying that my daughter isn't part of a family?!

How strange that you apply such different ideas to children and pets!

Sorry I typed it quickly and didn't word it correctly doh!

What I meant was I wouldn't give my children double barrelled surnames because our double barrel isn't very nice.

I want us all to have one surname wherever possible is what I meant I don't like double barrelled surnames personally.

Especially when they sound as naff as mine would. So it really isn't an option for us.

As I said I see it as a mark of a whole new life for me and OH and I would want our kids to be part of that not tide up with my old surname as well it all gets too confusing. I am traditional in most aspects and always knew that my maiden name wasn't for keeps. My name does not make me I will still be me even if I was called Nellie The Elephant.

Pinzy

Faith177 wrote: »

My name does not make me I will still be me even if I was called Nellie The Elephant.

I really like that thought. As has been said, it is the 21st century, and the tradition of taking your husbands name is only a tradition in a few countries. Fundamentally OP, do what feel's right for you. Being so close to your family means you'll never be less a part of them, but I can see the quandary.

Taking my partner's name means I will miss my old name. I've really grown to like it over the past few years. Our names wouldn't suit double-barreling though, and to be honest I'm looking forward to being Mrs Partner's-name more than feeling sentimental about the old name! :grinheart

Also, this
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katie1812

I think it's entirely up to the individual. There was no way that I wouldn't take his name, I wasn't overly bothered about keeping my maiden name. My mum has remarried and my brother will always have 'our' name so it's not like it will just stop (providing he has children lol!). To me, changing name is starting your new life as one, as the same identity.

At least with a double barrelled name you have his surname.. it doesn't necessarily mean he needs to change his too as you still have his included. Someone I work with got married last week, she is going double barrelled and he's staying the same