In hell: the B.W. Fox debt journal

B.W._Fox

Seaxwyn wrote: »

HI BW

Oct 2009 is a fantastic result! Lucky you!

You could maybe make it even sooner if your wife would lend you the money to bring you into credit, so you could switch to the A&L account sooner. You only need a statement showing you were in credit for one day, so you could pay her back straight away.

You seem really sorted now and your wife is bound to be impressed by your new focus.

I think that's an idea that she'll really go for! She seemed pleased about the prospect of moving my overdraft to 0%.

I've just sent an e-mail to see if she's willing - as soon as I've been paid at the end of the month the total bouncing between accounts will be less, and she'll be more comfortable with that.

Many thanks!

B

B.W._Fox

catewithers wrote: »

So was it the sofa or a proper bed last night?! How are things?

Proper bed!

Things are more civil, my 'credit rating' is still abysmal, but I do get use of the car to drive to the interview today. A little bit of dosh to park, but better on the pocketbook short-term than taking the train.

B

dreams_R_free

B.W._Fox wrote: »

I think that's an idea that she'll really go for! She seemed pleased about the prospect of moving my overdraft to 0%.

I've just sent an e-mail to see if she's willing - as soon as I've been paid at the end of the month the total bouncing between accounts will be less, and she'll be more comfortable with that.

Many thanks!

B

Good Morning B.W. I'm so glad that you seem much more optimistic and cheerful now.

Just one query though. Do you communicate with your wife regularly by e-mail? Maybe that's why you sometimes misunderstand each other's feelings about financial matters etc . There's no substitute for face-to-face communication even if it results in an argument sometimes:eek: .

Good Luck anyway. Keep up the good work:beer:

catewithers

B.W._Fox wrote: »

Proper bed!

Things are more civil, my 'credit rating' is still abysmal, but I do get use of the car to drive to the interview today. A little bit of dosh to park, but better on the pocketbook short-term than taking the train.

B

So glad things are settling down a bit. Hope she'll be well impressed with your efforts. She should be!

B.W._Fox

Storm wrote: »

Glad to hear you a bit more positive - having a debt free date really brings things into focus I find, and seeing how the small overpayments add up and bring the date closer makes such a HUGE difference too.

Being able to show figures like the snowball to your wife may help with the discussions too - if she can see that loaning you the money to stay in the black so you can change bank a/c will mean saving X amount on interest and possibly even bring your DFD forward it will hopefully encourage her to do so.

I've e-mailed her that if I get the A&L account that my DFD will move from October '09 to July '09. And that's a lot of fees and interest that will go straight into the student loan ... there's a chance that I could move it up further. Dare to dream!

I'm already over the moon. If I get the credit card and she says yes to the one-day loan, I may burst. :dance:

catewithers

BURST?!!!! Don't make a mess! You might get fired!!!!! :rotfl:

B.W._Fox

Impomdasp wrote: »

Do you communicate with your wife regularly by e-mail? Maybe that's why you sometimes misunderstand each other's feelings about financial matters etc . There's no substitute for face-to-face communication even if it results in an argument sometimes

We do have face to face time at home, but it's usually on the fly. I would like to schedule a 'sit-down and discuss' session every month, but we'll wait and see.

And I do like positive arguments where I can get my point across, have ammunition to fight back with. At least it's out in the open and maybe there's an idea or two I can bring up that she may not have thought about.

The longer I spend on this site, the smarter I get.

bobbadog

catewithers wrote: »

As a childless person I'm always happy to babysit for those friends of ours who do have sprogs and payment in wine is always very much appreciated!

Same here - am sure, Mr Foxy, that you have friends who'd love to look after your nippers - just one night a month is all it'd take to make you both feel a bit special. I'm easily pleased - midnight drive and a bag of chips and i'm anyones (well, my other halfs anyway). Failing that, as you live in Croydon you could leave the kids in Ikea for an hour or two x

Seaxwyn

I hope she says yes! My sister did the quick loan thing for me. I think my account was in credit for 3 days, and that was enough. A&L matched my overdraft limit of £3,750!

I can't tell you how wonderful not to live in my NatWest overdraft at 18 point something per cent any more. I actually EARN interest on that account now (OK, only pennies, but it still feels like a big achievement).

Good luck with the interview

B.W._Fox

misspoppy wrote: »

Hi

Half way through I started to remember your first post with your SOA and there was a lot of critisism of your wifes attitude. I take it nothing has changed because really unless you both accept that marriage is a partnership and you pool resources or at least split it fairly you are always going to have money problems and therefore tensions within your marriage.

The bottom line is that nothing will change if you both don't change.

I'm more confident that we're making strides towards this. If I cowboy up and get out from under the debt, it may set the tone for cooperation later on.