Nice people thread part 8 - worth the wait

lostinrates

Spirit wrote: »

Feeling really screwed up.

DD has been asked to make an address at our friends funeral on Tuesday.

It is an honoured but painful responsibilityand I have puposefully have steered clear of offering contributions, commentating or asking her about it as it her personal reflection. I can verge towards controlling so I do try to keep myself in check as she is an adult (reading Nikksters posts has really helped me think how an adult woman 'child' might perceive my natural style.

DD has written what she will say tonight. Just a few minutes ago she came down seeking "something" from me, I did not jump in but in answer to teh points she made gave my suggestion and some examples. WRONG.

We have immediately clashed and she has fled from the room telling me my input was not wanted.

I know we are all a bit fragile but that includes me. I cannot do right for doing wrong it seems.

Fragile is key here.

For the sake of what is important stick a piece of paper under her door. '8'm sorry I upset you. I love you. Il know you will do it perfectly in your way'. You might not feel like that just now, but ultimately, You know more than most ATM what is important.

My love to you spirit, I'm sorry its so grim for you right now.

PasturesNew

Spirit wrote: »

I know we are all a bit fragile but that includes me. I cannot do right for doing wrong it seems.

Of course it's all your fault ... it's in your job description as a parent.

PasturesNew

lostinrates wrote: »

Hmm. Frequent male error, confusing not ignoring you with encouraging you. .

Frequent michaels error too

lostinrates

We need to get a tv engineer in soon too. Our reception is not too bad apart for
M in the new kitchen. We have an Arial in the loft for it , but that doesn't work so we have rabbit ears but have to move them about quite a bit.

lostinrates

PasturesNew wrote: »

It's an aerial, unless you do your washing in the loft

That's one of the differences between renting and owning. If the TV aerial's !!!!!! and you own it you'll get a little man onto it and pay whatever's needed. As a renter, that's the last thing you'd do.

I was just going to use the cr4ppy indoor aerial forever more

Yep. We wouldn't have bothered when renting either. But then, we haven't sorted it in the last few months either!

I wondered why I couldn't make the word look right. . Thanks. .

Spirit_2

michaels wrote: »

You did your best and what you thought best, is there anything else you think you can do?

lostinrates wrote: »

Fragile is key here.

For the sake of what is important stick a piece of paper under her door. '8'm sorry I upset you. I love you. Il know you will do it perfectly in your way'. You might not feel like that just now, but ultimately, You know more than most ATM what is important.

.

PasturesNew wrote: »

Of course it's all your fault ... it's in your job description as a parent.

The wisdom of NP.

Invaluable.

Thank you

CKhalvashi

PasturesNew wrote: »

I was just going to use the cr4ppy indoor aerial forever more

I think it centres round whether a TV is a right, or a privilege, and I personally believe it's the former in this day and age.

As a LL, if there's a problem that could affect the TV, I will pay for it and get it sorted with reasonable speed (I think on one of our properties, I've adjusted the Sat dish several times now for a T in 5 months), however she's retired, and will probably stay in the property until she dies (she's 66 now), so bearing in mind she'll probably be paying my mortgage until then, I'd rather look after her.

This was a sale and rentback, done on a 7 year tenancy agreement, with automatic right to renew as long as I don't put the rent up by more than 2% a year on this agreement, and she pays the rent, as she wanted to get her sons onto the property ladder whilst properties are reasonably cheap. For £600/month, I've given her a property worth about that, plus free Sky TV, as the mortgage is about £300/month and I was feeling a little generous :cool:

CK

Nikkster

CKhalvashi wrote: »

I think it centres round whether a TV is a right, or a privilege, and I personally believe it's the former in this day and age.

I disagree, I don't think it is a right.
Don't get me wrong, it makes a huge difference if the only person you speak to is the person on the till in the supermarket (from experience), but with internet catch up etc there are other ways round (bandwidth allowing).

If it is more the background noise, a radio could do the same job (and can still catch up on news).

The tv in my room here is working off a very crappy indoor aerial (cheapest in Argos 10ish years ago), and I do find that esp in bad weather I have to move it sometimes (I think perhaps BBC comes from a different transmitter to other stations around here?).

Nikkster

Spirit, sorry to hear about emotions running so high. There was probably not a 'right' answer. Perhaps she was just looking for a way to release some emotion without knowing it - or being able to stop and think that you are also feeling the strain. I hope all goes as well as possible on Tuesday, and that the days until then are as calm as can be hoped for x

Nikkster

misskool wrote: »

Well done on getting tv again PN.

Anyone seen nikkister? She had a deadline with her thesis. Ahem.

And today, I went on my flying lesson. Was very enjoyable but can't get hooked as its expensive. Would love to have that much money though

Shhh... don't tell missk I was here...

Deadline schmedline.

Seriously though... I completely cleared last weekend of distractions (apart from crisp-based ones). Didn't even leave the house on Sunday. Didn't get much done though. Then was out and about yesterday (work), and another long day in the office today.

Taking stuff to do on the train (3 hours tomorrow, same on Sunday). Have given myself until end of Monday.:o