The Sex was amazing??

notanewuser

VestanPance wrote: »

Yes, I'd say it was.

Although once again I'm happy to admit that is my personality type. I've never been taken with the thought of casual sex or multi-dating, so I'll openly admit I'd be intolerant and incompatible of getting involved with someone who lead that lifestyle.

So you'd only consider an ex-nun then.

VestanPance

notanewuser wrote: »

So you'd only consider an ex-nun then.

I'm not considering anyone, as is well documented on these forums I've settled for the single life from here on in.

Hypothetically if I was looking then I'd be looking for someone who didn't have casual sex or multi-date.

Marshflower

Ladyhawk wrote: »

I think that one of the positives about stranger/ random sex is that you ca n be utterly free to express yourself, do whatever you want to do and not be inhibited by what your partner thinks. You can be selfish and not worry about anything except the pleasure.

The emotional connection makes things special, but it's not what makes you scream!

Interesting. Is it the norm to feel inhibited by ones partner? I honestly don't think I could have married my husband if I didn't feel completely sexually free with him.

bitemebankers

VestanPance wrote: »

I'll openly admit I'd be intolerant and incompatible of getting involved with someone who lead that lifestyle.

Fair enough, but don't you ever wonder what you're missing out on by imposing such rigid criteria? I know you're not currently seeking a relationship but are you at least open to the possibility of that changing in the future?

peachyprice

olias wrote: »

Was it THAT exciting!!!!:p

Olias

I just didn't see it coming

VestanPance

bitemebankers wrote: »

Fair enough, but don't you ever wonder what you're missing out on by imposing such rigid criteria? I know you're not currently seeking a relationship but are you at least open to the possibility of that changing in the future?

No, I don't feel I'm missing out on anything by dismissing casual encounters. I know this is not considered normal amongst us men folk but they never have interested me in the slightest. I need to feel an intellectual and emotional pull to someone to gather sexual interest in them.

I have no plans to change my stance on relationships. I lost trust in people and as you can see by my posting in this thread trust is very important to me, so I don't see me altering my stance on that particular subject.

lostinrates

VestanPance wrote: »

No, I don't feel I'm missing out on anything by dismissing casual encounters. I know this is not considered normal amongst us men folk but they never have interested me in the slightest. I need to feel an intellectual and emotional pull to someone to gather sexual interest in them.

I have no plans to change my stance on relationships. I lost trust in people and as you can see by my posting in this thread trust is very important to me, so I don't see me altering my stance on that particular subject.

S at what stage would you have expected me to divulge everything in all its minute detail to someone? It seems inappropriate for a new relationship where I am not sure I want to proceed to a sexual one for example.

Your stance is fine, it's your choice and I for one fully favour people having freedom of choice in how they conduct themselves so long as it hurts no one else.). But it might be your stance that has contributed to a situation that has obliquely lead you to lose trust in prove or relationships. If that ultimately makes you happy, then I think it's fine, regretfully, your posts often imply this has made you far from content. I don't think it's 'your stance' or 'mine' either. I think it's possible to be fully open about all detail of casual relationships and cagey about previous committed ones.

i am happy in a relationship and have no loss in trust of my partner (in fact I would suggest our living arrangements require large amount of trust ) so I am content that for us our approach is successful.

Fwiw, if this relationship ended for any reason I would hope to find another one I think. It's hard to imagine because the idea of this one ending is pretty heart stopping.

Person_one

bitemebankers wrote: »

This saddens me. Don't you miss being able to be truly open with someone, in the safety of a serious relationship?

Sometimes, no matter how much you love each other, one partner's most erotic sexual fantasy is a complete turn off for the other. It doesn't mean you're failing at your relationship to accept that there are some things you can't do within that relationship because it isn't a pleasant experience for the other person.

Person_one

SuzieSue wrote: »

No, perhaps the OP has always had amazing sex and considers it to be the norm.

Unless you have had unamazing sex then you wouldn't know what amazing sex was.

I strongly suspect that everybody who's had sex more than once has had unamazing sex! Probably far far more often than the amazing kind too. :rotfl:

VestanPance

lostinrates wrote: »

S at what stage would you have expected me to divulge everything in all its minute detail to someone? It seems inappropriate for a new relationship where I am not sure I want to proceed to a sexual one for example.

I'm not saying there's a time frame of questions, just that if any arise then that they are answered honestly. My original comments in this thread where made on the basis of at least one contributor stating that there were aspects of their lives they wouldn't let their significant others to know about.

A partner could ask me what they want at any time about my past. I've nothing to hide and if there was something about my past or present day actions that bothered them I'd be happy to talk through it with them.