The Sex was amazing??

lostinrates

bitemebankers wrote: »

Why ever not? If you can't share you deepest, darkest fantasies with your SO, who can you share them with? For me, having a LT relationships is about being able to share all this stuff. If you find your partner isn't accepting of what you are, it's time to find a new partner IMHO.

Long term, sure. But there are times in relationships where ones own needs or wants come second because of other 'baggage'.

VestanPance

lostinrates wrote: »

Long term, sure. But there are times in relationships where ones own needs or wants come second because of other 'baggage'.

I completely disagree with this sort of thinking. In any relationship complete and total honesty is required.

You can't hide who you are or what your experiences in life have been from someone who is supposed to be a life partner. Of course there will always be some things that will not please the other partner, but these things are there to be discussed and accepted not hidden.

EDIT: I consider myself a very closed off and cold person to most people. I'm very much not a "people person", but I can't understand hiding things from someone you plan to share a long term relationship with.

notanewuser

VestanPance wrote: »

I completely disagree with this sort of thinking. In any relationship complete and total honesty is required.

You can't hide who you are or what your experiences in life have been from someone who is supposed to be a life partner. Of course there will always be some things that will not please the other partner, but these things are there to be discussed and accepted not hidden.

That's just your view, and certainly not likely to be shared unanimously amongst the general population.

I, for one, couldn't disagree more.

Out of interest, are you single or in a relationship?

bitemebankers

notanewuser wrote: »

I don't know why it should sadden you.

It saddens me because you're missing out on so much, and it appears you're in denial about it too. Still, if you're contented with your lot, I guess that's the main thing.

VestanPance

notanewuser wrote: »

That's just your view, and certainly not likely to be shared unanimously amongst the general population.

I, for one, couldn't disagree more.

Out of interest, are you single or in a relationship?

Was married, now divorced and single through choice with no plans to get involved with anyone else.

bitemebankers

lostinrates wrote: »

Long term, sure. But there are times in relationships where ones own needs or wants come second because of other 'baggage'.

Sure, but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about being truly open and honest with your partner - about both of you feeling able to do this. This isn't about putting yourself first, it's about being open, and that's at the heart of any good relationship, for me anyway.

notanewuser

bitemebankers wrote: »

It saddens me because you're missing out on so much, and it appears you're in denial about it too. Still, if you're contented with your lot, I guess that's the main thing.

How patronising!

I'm more than content, thank you.

I have a very loving relationship with my husband. I don't need to know everything about his life before me, nor he mine. It's almost like they were previous lives, if that makes sense? No ghosts, no baggage. It's only our world that matters.

If you don't like it, I don't care!

notanewuser

VestanPance wrote: »

Was married, now divorced and single through choice with no plans to get involved with anyone else.

Has your viewpoint changed through those experiences?

Have you managed to find anyone who shares your view?

peachyprice

notanewuser wrote: »

Completely agree. Had I not experimented with casual partners before meeting my now husband, I'd have never have even tried anal sex.

Cheers, juice all over my keyboard now.

notanewuser

peachyprice wrote: »

Cheers, juice all over my keyboard now.

Sorry! :rotfl: