I'm in a bit of a pickle can you help?

poltergeist

Thank you very much for all your replies, it's sure appreciated.

Yes, it is interesting to read how different people have different ways of handling this situation, I wanted everyone's opinions very much thought though someone would come on that had been in exact the same position and say 'oh do this, this worked, this is the way to go, foolproof' there is no such thing, I know that.

I have read this a few times now and I don't know what is going to happen, what is ultimately the very best thing to do to guarantee my marriage to be back on track, with there not possibly being such a thing I am left with trying a bit of everything.

I will not be going for the underwear, just not me, the holiday I mentioned but I am not sure that is such a good idea just now as we are on such dodgy ground putting him in a place where he has to be with me 24/7 for x amount of time might be a bit over whelming and not what he can do.

Be unavailabe, well yes but with no games, not prepared to play games, trying to get the' want to be close' as someone said yes, I was out all day yesterday and he was also and we met later on at the end of the day, so I never over crowded him, never phoned or texted etc and he seemed to be happy when he returned.

I never asked for sex last night as someone said, I just gave him a kiss, turned over and said goodnight like someone else said.

I have not asked for long winded emotional chats as I think that is the worse thing we could do, I am leaving him to be, I don't think he is sulking and having no balls as has been said, I think he is hurt and coping the best he can.

As for treating like a spoilt child and buying his love, true, I wanted to show him that I was sorry, the tickets I have now will stand but have not bought anything else, he is looking forward to going to his concert next saturday.

As for my health that someone also asked, I had a few weeks of constant breathlessness with a barrage of tests, no actual results could have been panic attacks, with medication and time that has calmed down, I also lost my job, the wages and someone off the internet hacked into my account and took all my money(the bank returned it when they got proof it was not me) all lthat paled into insignificance of having to arrange 2 funerals, the sibling feuds that went with that, etc etc, it was a horrid time.