Lose Weight 12

victory

daysieblue wrote: »

Ah Victory - I don't suppose that's helpful at all is it? You've done so well to get to your goal, I only wish I could achieve half as much.

You look as if you're laughing it off, which is great. I can see how comments like that could knock your self confidence, especially if made while you were younger.

Just remember you have done AMAZINGLY WELL, give yourself a bug hug in congratulations

db xx

Thanks Days when I was growing up I was always put down, if I was wearing trousers should have been a skirt, my hair was too long too short, nails too long or short, legs too long, arms too short, it was always wrong but now because of it I do the same in my adult life, I compare myself to everyone on the street and automatically think they look better than me, their hair looks nicer, their make-up lovelier etc, shame because I have done so well but I can't seem to appreciate the full value of it.
I have two boys, my mother passed her insecurities on to me and now I make sure that no way will go to another generation, my boys have a secure, happy free of insecurities upbringing and they are blossoming into lovely kids...
My mother still in her 80's and me old! can reduce me to an insecure 2 year old that gets lost and can't think straight:D

victory

Thanks suggs no my mother is not Irish:D she says she has earnt the right to say what she wants as she is in her 80's but she has done that all her life:rotfl: seems to take some kind of secret pleasure in the put downs and then when you question how could she say so and so she gets defensive and says that she meant nothing by it and that I am touchy, have no sense of humour and it is all my fault:eek:

I can't even think about my swimsuit (def will not be a bikini!!!) as cannot get past the stomach issue so have not in any way been shopping for one, I have to have one but I am struggling with it....

I have been this weight once before but covered it up with trousers, long tops etc however many comments were to the positive and vowed next time if there was to be a next time I would enjoy it and life live to the full in nice clothes etc but that has not come with it and I am a mixture of annoyed with myself, disappointed, tearful, exasperated at myself, all this self confidence and the strutting and the at ease with yourself has to come from within however much anyone else says, like the prog says how to look good naked, it has to come from you....

Thanks Jo it is always nice to know that I am helping someone else, can't be all that bad eh:D

I did tell my mother exactly how much weight I had lost (she asked how much I weigh but told her that was a secret!!) I put it in stones and kilos and she never said oh well done that is masses, clever you, no nothing like that just oh you are still fat then!!!!!

I am married , have 2 fab kids, lovely house, food on the table, good life, not so much seeking mother approval but one nice comment before she dies would not be so bad!!! She has far too much influence on me and can make me vulnerable and quiver at what she says and I get even more determined to seek approval only to have it crash around me again, I never dieted for her only for me and my health and my BMI diabetes etc but now it has been done a smile and a kind word from her would not go amiss but no....

Suggs

victory wrote: »

I can't even think about my swimsuit (def will not be a bikini!!!) as cannot get past the stomach issue so have not in any way been shopping for one, I have to have one but I am struggling with it....

I will if you will Remember you promised when you started that we would all be in our bikinis this summer

Lois_Lane

victory wrote: »

This will make you laugh....last night phone call from my mother (we only contact when absolutely necessary, I blame her squarely for my huge lack of self confidence) chatting away saying she had heard of my weight loss and how it was about time, then...."so then do you look like victoria Beckham a size 0?" When I said no that I did not have the bone structure for that and did not think that I would be able to get to a size 0 plus it is not particularly healthy to look so skeletony she interrupted and said.....oh I see so you are still fat then?:eek: How much self confidence can you get when all you get is that eh?:D

Hi Victory - you did well to laugh, I'd have been very tempted to give her a mouthful! :mad: So according to your mother, anyone over size 0 is fat..? Is she size 0? Does she even know what size 0 is, or has she just picked up on this latest trend from the tabloids? The only people that can achieve a size 0 are those with very very small frames, and they would be underweight.

I know she's your mother, and you probably feel some loyalty to her, but as a parent she deserves to be shot. My mother can be as subtle as a sledgehammer and once, I proudly told her I'd come second in my class for English, and the response was - 'why didn't you come first?' - no well done, just a put down. People don't realise the lasting impact that comments like that can make on a child, and you may be an adult now, but you're still her child and it still hurts.

You've done really well, give yourself a huge pat on the back and forget her thoughtless comments. And I'm sure no-one gives your tummy a second look, so learn to love it! Find parts of your body that you do like, and wear clothes that emphasise them, that will take the focus away from the bits you don't like. Wear low necked tops and show off your cleavage, wear short skirts to highlight your legs, or cropped trousers to show off your ankles.

LL

victory

Thanks Lois yes she deserves to be shot:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

My mum has always been super thin, she is an infuriating picker, she will refuse food on her plate but when it gets served up she will just have a little from your plate, a little of that, a picker:D

My mum knows I have not got the frame for a size 0, it is just her way of showing me her yet again disappointment, I have often wondered if she is jealous of me and my determination to achieve but can't be that as she is pencil thin anyway so it should have been me envying her as she does not have to worry about what clothes will fit next month:rotfl: :rotfl:

Crumbs you have just reminded me of my school report, straight A's it was, just one B and she passed it to my grandad and said " look at that, that is why I pay for her to go to private school for her to get a B":eek: no mention of all the other A's:rotfl: :rotfl:

I have analyzed my problem (very analytic mind, like to know why, when where etc) and have decided my main prob apart from an insensitive mother is this holiday in 7 weeks, the packing, what to wear, how to wear it, the swimsuit, how to basically disappear into the background but have a happy hol also, jumping into the pool or the sea fills me with dread.... plus my mother will be there (going back to my home town in Spain and she will be there in her flat while I have rented a flat at the bottom of the hill, my brother will be there also) My mother, my kids, my Spanish friends, no one knows I am going over there for 6 weeks it is meant to be a surprise for the boys, for my friends and it sure as hell will be a surprise for my mother:rotfl: :rotfl: 6 weeks of attacking me verbally for her it will be bliss:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Lois yes I have other parts of the body apart from the tummy that I quite like so do emphasise those but unfortunately for me and my mind when I look in the mirror all I see is this huge fat over-hang that has to go into a swimsuit soon and I can't bear it:D

victory

Suggs wrote: »

I will if you will Remember you promised when you started that we would all be in our bikinis this summer

I will be wearing a 1930's all in one head to toe swimsuit:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: tried to get a photo over but failed;)

dawnydee73

I've lost 1lb this week, so again not met the challange but I am pleased I have lost. Try again for next months. I go on holiday on Saturday so will not be weighin in next week, I hope the weather picks up, its cold here

peanutpie05

Hi, this is my 1st 'weigh in' ... from my start weight (On Friday) to this morning i have lost 1lb.

I'm hoping to do a minimum of 2lbs a week ... so 1lb in just over half a week is ok for me:)

I'm surprised tbh that I've managed to lose at all because I've really been tested this last few days. Amidst a house move (if I can ever find one to move in to!), starting a business, already self employed with another business, being asked to do some hours for my former employer, house like a pig stye, looking after my four young children (half term too), financial worries ....the list goes on. I have found resolve threatening to weaken on many occasions.

I know there are many others with more busy/troublesome lifestyles than me ... but it's just been a tough time. And if I get wound up .. I usually head straight for the chocolate aisle at my local shop:o

I honestly don't think I'd have stayed on track this week if it weren't for all your inspiration and support.

Thanks guys:grouphug:

peanutpie05

Was interested to know if anyone else had certain foods they used as 'diet savers' (when they are really peckish / in need of something) which were low cal/ healthy?

I know some people and diet plans probably don't allow for any snacking between meals ... but I find if I HAVE to eat something because I'm just so hungry, I find it better to have something healthy than try and go without and end up bingeing later.

These are my personal choices/experiences....

I find if I have any sugar early in the day ... I just fall off the wagon. I think it unstabilises my blood sugar levels as I just seem to be permanently hungry after eating high sugar foods. I used to have bran flakes with raisins sprinkled over (quite a few raisins though:o ) for my breakfast. But I would just be really peckish very soon after. So now I have a banana sliced up with plain natural low fat yoghurt and it keeps me going much longer.

I use Ainsley Harriott slim soups mid morning/afternoon if I need a savoury 'something'. They're about 75 cals each (not too bad).

Also, don't know if anyone else has ever made fruit bran loaf. Some might think it rather gross (it does have an acquired taste/texture:rolleyes: )
Anyhow I make it with All Bran, Sultanas, Cinnamon,Soya Milk,and S.R. flour. It is supposed to have sugar in too ... but I tried making it with splenda the other day and it is just as good. There is no fat in the recipe at all ... so I can eat it without too much of a conscience and it is quite solid - so very filling. I usually have a peice mid afternoon to keep me going till dinner time.

I also keep mullerlight yoghurts in (toffee:D ) and that's my evening treat.

I have a salad sandwich at lunch (2 rounds ) and whatever I am cooking for the family at dinner time (I always cook healthy meals for my kids so I don't worry about cals etc at dinner time).

Hope I haven't gone on too much:o

jojilufc

Hi all

Peanutpie, can you put some quantities on for your cake/loaf it sounds good to me.

Does anyone know how to work syns out for home baking?? Made some muffins for kids yest and dont know how to work it
If it helps it was 1 1/2 cup of flour, 1/2 cup artificial sweetener, 1/2 cup asda's new lighter butter (45% Less fat), 2 eggs, 1 cup chocolate pieces.

I know eggs are free, I know splenda is free but is Asda's artificial sweetener??? Kids love them, I've had 1 after a 1 1/2 hour gym session (thought I deserved one then:D )

I want to get into baking again, but just don't know how to fit it into SW:o

Jo