seperated....holidays with kids

FatVonD

janninew wrote: »

OK, so we are calling the OP a liar now?! We only get one side of the story on all threads on forums like these, we have to make comments on what the poster says, otherwise what is the point of commenting? None of us know the couple and kids so do we make our own assumptions, or do we listen to the OP and give suggestions on the facts they tell us!

That's very true, it's very rare that anybody gives both sides to a situation as they rarely want to know what is actually right, they just want everyone to tell them that they are.

The OP, like many others, has only given 'facts' that back up thier side of the story but I think we all know nothoing is ever that clear cut.

jayII

peachyprice wrote: »

All we can do is comment based on is how our relationships work and how we would feel. Having separated from my first husband when my boys were 18 months, I have never seen us as anything other than equal parents with only our son's best interest at heart, just because we don't love each other doesn't mean we don't love our children, and based on that I don't see that time spent with me is any more important than time spend with their dad, just because I am their mother. I certainly would never have stopped him taking them anywhere at any age, and why would I think I had the right to?

Not at all, we can also comment based on our life experiences, an awareness that there are usually two sides to every story, our personal and professional knowledge of human nature and so much more!

I too would never have had issues with my children's father taking them away for a week or three, I do and always have seen him as an equal parent to me.

However, that does not mean that the OP here is definitely telling the whole truth. They may be, they may not be, who knows.

All we can do is read and try to interpret/understand the OP's posts, then give our personal perspective on our interpretation.

FBaby

Let's not forget that there are some mothers, who even in a happy relationship with her kids' dad, would have serious anxiety issues at leaving them go away alone with him on holiday. The only difference is that it is unlikely to happen. The point though is that such feeling is not always the result of the separation but of the protectiveness one feels when they are the primary care giver.

broonbear

Here's hoping they don't need a lawyer. As i understand it they have already thrashed out who pays for this and that and they have a rota of when each has the boys it's that the mother has always wanted to go to Florida and i mean always and to think the boys will be there without her is too much for her to bear.

FBaby

Well surely that's fair enough isn't? Or is he doing to spite her? Does he really need to take them so soon after the separation? Who are you in relation to him. You do sound very one sided indeed. I'm not saying that he shouldn't be allowed to take his kids away, but it sounds like the circumstances are such that he is not helping the matter himself.

claire16c

broonbear wrote: »

Here's hoping they don't need a lawyer. As i understand it they have already thrashed out who pays for this and that and they have a rota of when each has the boys it's that the mother has always wanted to go to Florida and i mean always and to think the boys will be there without her is too much for her to bear.

How amicable is the split? Or is that a stupid question? Is the ex wife still friendly with the extended family?

Just wondering if she could go along with them, stay in her own room but still partake in the holiday?

FatVonD

broonbear wrote: »

Here's hoping they don't need a lawyer. As i understand it they have already thrashed out who pays for this and that and they have a rota of when each has the boys it's that the mother has always wanted to go to Florida and i mean always and to think the boys will be there without her is too much for her to bear.

How terribly convenient. I rest my case :rotfl:

Seriously, I knew somebody who took his ex wife to Disneyland, Florida with him and the kids. His view was why would he want to deny his ex the chance to see the look on their kids faces on a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Thoroughly decent move.