Less than 12 weeks pregnant club! Part 3

Birdie85

The letter didn't say but the people at work who've been to 'my' hospital say that the partner went in first, saw everything was OK then Mums were allowed in.

Oh isn't mad on the idea so I suggested we have a private scan further down the line and invite the Mums to that. Might be the best (if expensive!) option!

Faerie

Ooh! A private scan is a good idea, I want a 3D/4D scan at some point. My mum and nanna would LOVE to come! I might book it as a surprise

TeamLowe

Birdie i wouldn't like to have my mum there, lovely as she is i just want DH there, espcially if things go wrong, I'd need time before I could tell anyone else.
Plus my gut feeling is it's a private thing between me and DH and baby but each to their own.

Faerie

TeamLowe, I've already had to tell our mums that they are NOT being in the delivery room with me. My mum said, you might change your mind later on. No I really won't!

Birdie85

Well TBH TL that's how I felt, about it being something special between your little family, but it's just that talking to the other people at work who thought nothing of having Mums along, and it actually being a bit strange not to have them there, made me doubt myself!

I do wonder though if it's down to a maturity thing? I mean, OH and I have been married for 2 years (together for nearly 7), we're very independent and whilst we're close to our Mums we've definitely cut the apron strings. The people I was talking to at work had their children out of wedlock (to use a very outdated phrase!), hadn't been with their partners as long as I've been with OH and they seem a little too attached to their Mums still... so maybe it's just that I've a more mature outlook? I don't know...

I'm not mad on the thought of having any parents at the birth either. Just OH please, thank you very much! Have the impression that my Mum will turn up though! When we first started talking about this I said I wanted my Mum as OH is so bad with anything remotely 'gross' he won't be much use to me but then he said 'If your Mum is there my Mum should be' but I *really* don't want my MIL getting a good look at my nether regions! :eek: Will do without anyone there in that case! God, it's so difficult having to fit in 2 families all the time, isn't it?! Baby's not even here yet, it's going to be a nightmare sorting our birthdays, Christmasses and first family holidays etc!

Jox

Can anyone imagine being on a programme like One Born Every Minute, that is a bit too public for me!

I like the idea of a home birth but for a first baby will probably need medical professionals around me (I don't like thinking that far ahead yet though!)

I've taken the last 2 days off work to be with OH, he's not working and feeling down, the pills might take a couple of weeks to kick in, I know I'm selfish but I'm usually the "strong" one and would like to lean on him sometimes! We sat in the park yesterday and I took loads of food with us and managed to eat most of it! Must get the thought of eating for 2 out of my head.

We were thinking of funny names to call the baby (I won't say incase I offend anyone )

My bras are too small too, I've got a quite a decent cleavage today for a change!

firefly369

TeamLowe wrote: »

Birdie i wouldn't like to have my mum there, lovely as she is i just want DH there, espcially if things go wrong, I'd need time before I could tell anyone else.
Plus my gut feeling is it's a private thing between me and DH and baby but each to their own.

Totally agree with this. I think our long journey to get here and the ups and downs of the pregnancy are a couples experience. I understand why someone would want their mum there if they didn't have a partner but I think showing the scan photos is inclusive enough.

Faerie wrote: »

TeamLowe, I've already had to tell our mums that they are NOT being in the delivery room with me. My mum said, you might change your mind later on. No I really won't!

Already had this conversation with my mum. There was pouting and pressing together of lips. She was not happy but this is my and my OH experience. Probably sounds mean, I don't mean it to be I love my mum but these first moments with our much longed for child are very precious.

SmlSave

Hi everyone

Just had my Dr's appointment, blood pressure ok and weighed in at just over 11st. Seeing as I've not weighed myself for 2 years I didn't think that was too bad. First midwife appointment on the 30th July.

Not feeling too good with cramps and a funny tummy - I'm telling myself that its just bad luck and I've got a bug.

Birdie If you're already worrying about balancing things with the families then you might want to have a chat with your OH about your expectations and how you want to do things when you're further along.

At my hospital you're only allowed two birth partners. My OH was with me (he stayed at the top end) and my Mum was on call if I needed her. Poor thing was called out to help OH with DS at 1am as i was still in theater.

All family/friends had strict instructions that unless they had made an appointment with me to visit that no one was coming into the house let alone the hospital! We started as we wanted to go on, that we are in control of organizing our lives Don't I sound like a hard case?

To be fair DS sees my family a little more as Mum is more flexible with looking after him but we try and keep visits 50/50 as much as possible. Our first Christmas was lovely with just the 3 of us though and I want to have a 'just us' Christmas this year too, esp if I'm due in March

msmoneypennyplease

Birdie85 wrote: »

EDD and 12 Week Scan Lists:

FranO: (22-1-2014) - 18th July 2013
Firefly: (25-1-2014)
Mazzarati: (31-1-2014) -22 July 2013
TeamLowe: (3-2-2014) - 22nd July 2013
Samtoby: (5-2-2014)
Birdie: (8-2-2014) - 22nd July 2013
Faerie: (9-2-2014) - 24th July 2013
HungryKitty: (16-2-2014)
Jox: (17-2-2014)
CherryBomb: (17-2-2014)
Jenni: (25-2-2014)
Msmoneyoennyplease: (25-2-2014) - 6th August 2013
MrsBunny: (26-2-2014)
please-let-me-be-lucky: (27-2-2014)
Becca: (3-3-2014)
FaithHope: (5-3-2014)
Kynthia: (7-3-2014)
Lara: (7-3-2014)
Miffy Moo:
Magpie:

Thanks Birdie...think I've added myself-hope I've done it correctly!!

msmoneypennyplease

Like many of you, I hadn't even considered having our Mums at appointments etc. Our scan letter did stipulate however that only 2 people allowed to come to scan - me plus one other. Otherwise it would've been lovely to invite Mum. As for delivery & labour-the less people that see that the better as far as I'm concerned!!!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-23265810 was just reading this article about more babies being born outside of marriage relating to your comment birdie. Thought it was interesting. I work in a very deprived area of the city and it is the complete norm for parents not to be married there...lots of very young mothers etc. Crazy to think how different it was in 1938!