MSE Newborn to 1 year (& beyond!) baby club 2

vic3

Hi claretsgirl!

LO has got cattarh. I'm trying to fathom out whether it's in his nose or not. It doesn't seem to be causing him any discomfort. He has the occasional cough though.

*Nutella*

claretsgirl wrote: »

Hi all. Not sure of the etiquette around here but is it ok if I join you? I have my DD 6months old.

Welcome to the thread and belated congratulations on the birth of your little lady! Of course it's OK for you to join - we're a friendly bunch with babies and children ranging from a few weeks old up to almost two years (and beyond for those with more than one child), so there's always someone who can give advice and support. That said, we're also happy to be subjected to rants, shopping tips and discount codes, and anything else you feel like sharing!

katiechoc_2

Welcome claretsgirl, make yourself at home.

Oh no fluff hope you feel better soon. I've seen a few on fb that have had that too, and once LO gets it mummy often gets it too.

Nutella I'm all in favour of online shopping too, I've bought one thing in town this year so far, everything else has been off Etsy or Amazon. I hate making the effort of going to town and then the shops not having what you want! Give me the iPad and a cuppa (and napping LO) any day!

Hope you all feel better soon cake. I've not tried G with any cough syrups - it's so hard getting medicine into him I was loathe to spend the £ on stuff that a) he probably wouldn't take and b) doesn't have an awful lot of useful stuff in. A bath in a nice steamy bathroom has always helped though. And prop the end of the cot or mattress up too.

continualdiamond

Hello everyone. Coming on for a rant I'm sorry to say. Will do me the world of good to type away and get cross at the keys, lol.

Does anyone else's husband seem to think this parenting thing is just a breeze and not actually get how hard it is being a stay at home mum (well on maternity leave at the minute mum)??

Last night we went round to friends for a take away, 4 couples in total all with babies as we're all from antenatal class. So my husband rings at 5 pm to say he'll be home for 6 pm and can I have everything ready to take....thought in my head 'why the bleep wouldn't I have everything ready' but just politely said 'yes'.

So off we went. Arrived just after 7 pm and got Scarlett out of her car seat and he held her for all of like 2 secs it seemed, she was hungry so I said 'do you wanna feed her (big mistake), he said, you can, I'll do the night feeds' that really annoyed me as it seemed he said that to look good because Scarlett for the last 2 weeks does not wake in the night she normally has a bottle at 10:30 pm, asleep just after 11 pm and then wakes between 5 -6 am.

So here I am, again feeding her and having my own drink at the same time. Not like I've not done this on/off all day already.

So we order chinese and we all places our babies in the living room in carry cots etc and not once did my husband get off his chair to check on her. I was like a yo-yo and really didn't have much to eat.

After tea she was awake so thought it wasn't fair to keep her in the lounge so I picked her up and bought her into the kitchen. Sure enough she wanted another bottle, this time my husband fed her for a bit, before passing her back because she was tired.

So back into the lounge with her where another mum/baby were already. Scarlett was over tired at this point and when she is like that she really cries, so took me awhile to calm her down and get her to sleep. This was at 9:45 pm, not once did my husband come and check on me/ask if I wanted anything.

All the other husbands did for their wives.

At 12 am everyone decided it was time to leave and whilst I was getting the changing bag my husband said 'you didn't drink your cup of tea'.

I replied 'well no, how could I, I was getting Scarlett to sleep' I bite my tongue as really wanted to say 'you could of offered to help or bring the cup of tea through to me'

So all day and all night I did 99% of the looking after our daughter. I had wrongly assumed he would of let me had a bit of a break last night as this morning he left here at 11 am to go to Sheffield with a mate to see a band and is stopping at his mates over night.

It just make me soooo mad and then he wonders why Scarlett is a better baby for me and not him.

fluffnutter

katiechoc wrote: »

Oh no fluff hope you feel better soon. I've seen a few on fb that have had that too, and once LO gets it mummy often gets it too.

Don't they just. Although I'm not sure he's actually had it! He's still on the boob so perhaps he's getting my antibodies and ended up with a mild dose.

BeNiceToMySelf

continualdiamond it's really hard, anytime you want to rant we are here. I think ranting at your OH might help too so he realises. It's hard to strike the balance between screaming at them and having a polite conversation that might be ignored. It's best to do it before you are burnt out and ready to put LO in the bin. I have cussed my OH a few times over the past few weeks and he's been really nice today. He was on the phone to his mum saying that looking after LO 24/7 is really hard and EBF. I read 'babyproofing your marriage' when I was pregnant and they suggested doing a 'training weekend' where you leave LO with OH for a whole weekend and you go away I'm quite tempted...

fluffnutter so sorry to hear you are so poorly. It must be so hard taking care of LO when you are that ill. hope you get better soon.

hi claretsgirl, welcome to the thread

AFM considering the routines like EASY in the hope of getting more sleep but I do think I'm pretty lucky that LO sleeps for a block of 6/7 hours. I think I'm going to try and get him to go to sleep earlier and hope he wakes up at the same time!

Mrshaworth2b

Evening ladies, I'm exhausted.

I've had a whingey teething baby for the last two days, I can cope with the clingyness but I cannot cope with the constant moaning noise he does all day long. I'm so jaded today mentally.

Welcome claretsgirl and congrats.

Fluff I really do hope you start to feel better soon. Hate being ill it's horrible.

Continual I completely know where your coming from, it's taken a good few sharp conversations and me going back to work for oh to realise how hard I have it some days. I'm at work tomorrow and although I've had two days of hardship with lo what's the betting he'll be all sweetness and light while I'm gone.

Afm once lo has gone to sleep I'm off to wrap his presents and have a large glass of wine while watching X factor final. Then I have work tomorrow, I've worked everyday this week! I'm knackered!

Here's hoping lo stays asleep for a while tonight rather than waking every hour! Please all cross your fingers!

katiechoc_2

continualdiamond ah that sounds hard . Being a sahm (or on maternity leave mum) isn't all it's cracked up to be sometimes. I think you need to tell him straight out what you need from him, men are idiots (sweeping generalisation, I know, I'm good at those!) and need it spelled out for them. for instance next time you're in that situation rather than asking if he wants to feed her just say "your turn to feed her this time" as you pass her over with the bottle and there's really not much he can do about it! It's been said before on this thread that dads are generally more use when the LOs are a bit bigger but that doesn't mean I don't still have to ask mine to do things sometimes. A lot of the time it's not that he's deliberately avoiding doing it, more that he just doesn't notice. Having said all that I think your OH could do with a kick up the !!!! right now. Hope you've got some wine and chocolate .

minimuffin12

Evening all, cd- big hugs, rant away, its good for the soul! Men just dont get it do they? Would def be having a word with him, its not fair for you to do all of the work then he goes away for the night! always hand ds to my dh when he comes home from work. I know he is tired but im tired too and the work doesnt stop when ds goes to bed, I only start the housework at that time!

Welcome clarets girl! Hi to everyone, sorry im knackered, ds has been waking up at 4am for the past week, rolling over!. He had previously slept through so no idea why, ah well just have to hope its a phase, prob one that will last 3years.lol

continualdiamond

Thanks all, felt this was the place to air my feelings.

I didn't say much to him in the car on the way home, however he said he needs to spend more time with her as he noticed that the other babies were just as happy spending time with the dads where as Scarlett isn't.

Don't get me wrong, he helps out around the house and whilst I appreciate him getting a bottle ready when I am changing her, it doesn't do Scarlett any good to not have her dad give her the bottle.

She's 10 weeks old tomorrow and whilst she does smile at my husband she's definitely not as comfortable with him as she is with me. Only just the other night did my husband say 'what do I do with her'.....

She had been changed and had a bottle and he just assumed that = sleep next. So when I walked into the bedroom and took one look at her and said to him 'she's not tired, she won't sleep' the look on his face was as if to say well what now.

I had to then explain that he could read to her or get her toys out but he had no clue on what to do. So I sat with her and showed her a book that has black and white pictures in it and I just talked about them.

I'm definitely not saying I'm a know what I am doing mum but I can only assume I don't feel silly doing stuff like that or being silly around her as I work in a school. He clearly is uneasy about it.

He visited some relatives on Wednesday with her and I decided not to go, purely because I wanted some 'me' time as I have never been in the house on my own since she was born. He was gone all of 1 whole hour and when I heard the door open I was really peeved off. He couldn't stay any longer he said as she was starting to get unsettled and knew that she wanted me.

Next time, I'll have to go out of the house so then he can't come and find me, hahaha.

I have enjoyed a chicken casserole for my tea, a ginger bread latte and a chocolate eclair, it's been bliss...