Son quit job

tesuhoha

Personally I would try to persuade him to beg for his job back, for a second chance if at all possible.

My son has been like it for years and hes now 23. This evening he asked me what I would do in his shoes after being unemployed for years to go about getting into work. He wants to do charity or volunteering work and I advised him to get out there and take any opportunity that presents itself. He is not unintelligent but the truth is he has made it very difficult for himself and there is very little I can do to help him now.

There is so much competition and many people who would give their right arm for an opportunity like your son had.

suze200

Wilma33 wrote: »

Has he actually handed in his notice and is currently working his notice period or has he just hold you he is going to? Is there any chance you can persuade him to stay?! Or did he just walk out?

Told them he wanted to leave yesterday. He should work 2 weeks notice. He went in today and said hed been hasty and tried to pursuade his boss to give him another chance. He said sorry but no. Got called to HR for a meeting and was given p45 and they said they would pay him in lieu of notice and not to go back.

suze200

Welshwoofs wrote: »

Does he picture himself as some romantic figure, wandering the countryside, sleeping under self-constructed branch hides and hunting/foraging to feed himself? If so, does he know anything at all about foraging or hunting? There's also only one person in the UK who's managed to survive a year on 100% foraged food - the guy's name is Fergus the Forager (he's a professional forager of many years' experience who supplies high end restaurants) and even he struggled...and we're talking some days there was only very ripe Badger roadkill...

You've hit the nail on the head there tht is exactly how he see himself. He knows nothing about foraging, hunting or anything and camping experience is limited to a few trips with cubs and scouts as a kid.

Spirit_2

suze200 wrote: »

Told them he wanted to leave yesterday. He should work 2 weeks notice. He went in today and said hed been hasty and tried to pursuade his boss to give him another chance. He said sorry but no. Got called to HR for a meeting and was given p45 and they said they would pay him in lieu of notice and not to go back.

Well that is one life lesson learnt or has it not sunk in?

Treevo

Blackpool_Saver wrote: »

That is WAY over the top, we don't know the background/circumstances or anything. Many young lads don't get as far as this one has by 19

As far as what? Unemployed? I think you'll find they do.

Treevo

Joons wrote: »

Do you have kids? If so, is this how you would treat them? He may be an `adult` but he's not a waster - he's a 19 year old who knows mum and dad will cover his back, that doesn't make him a waster, just a normal teenager.

Yes. Mine wouldn't walk out of a perfectly good job without a damn good reason, and if while living under my roof, without discussing it with me. If they did, they'd be expected to have a new job within a fortnight, and if they didn't, they wouldn't be living in my house.

Walking out of a perfectly good job on a whim is not normal teenage behaviour - it's pathetic irresponsibility.

Anyone who walks out a job on a whim is a waster.

Treevo

suze200 wrote: »

Thank you Blackpool Saver. The bank doesn't employ idiots. He got his job after a full day assessment with apptitude tests, group activitities, making a presentation and one to one interview. 200 applicants were interviewed, in groups of 40 per day over 5 days. Out of the 200, 20 were taken on.

And he walked out on a whim. Actions speak louder than words.

FBaby

I think if it was my son, I would be worried that something wasn't right with his mind and be concerned he was depressed and confused with life. That's on the assumption that he is a clever child and one who hasn't given you tons of trouble with laziness before.

I can totally understand your frustration and worry, but have you tried to analyse why he would have given up college and a good job? Saying something is boring is a very poor excuse for an intelligent hard working kid, so something must be going on with him. His desire to go and live of the land also hint to me towards a lost kid who just has enough of life pressures and expectations.

I think what I would aim to try is rather than going on about what a bad person he is for doing what he did, I would make it clear that I am disappointed in his actions but try to work with him to get him back on his feet. That doesn't mean avoiding the tough love because he does indeed to learn the consequences of his actions, but also being there for him to try to help him find the way out of his confused state, help him getting inspired and motivated again, because without it, any tough love will only just bring him down further.

thunderbird

Maybe he just isn't cut out for this type of work. Never a good idea to quit a job with nothing else lined up, but you live and learn.
Maybe he would be better off going off on a gap year

busiscoming2

How about him going into one of the Forces?